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AIBU?

To be antisocial on holiday

74 replies

Dollymixtureyumyum · 07/02/2016 20:05

Just got back from a week away in Yorkshire with DH and Ds in a caraven/lodge.
The family in the next lodge tried to keep latching on to us, don't get me wrong I don't mind an hello and a bit of chat but everything we saw them they tried to make friends with us.
They were a very brash couple who tended to come out with racist and ignorant comments and when I challenged them they just laughed Hmm. Their DD took a liking to trying to pinch and nip our Dd. The husband thought everything he said was funny.
They kept asking us round for a drink at night
Came and sat with us in the club, even dragged a table over when we sat on a small table trying to avoid them so after a four nights and we stopped going in only for them to bang on our door on the way back and ask why.
They turned up in two locations we said we were visiting and suggested we spend the day together. We didn't as they did not want to pay to go in anywhere thank god, we soon learnt not to say where we were going.
They kept saying we must keep in to touch when we went home as they only lived in the next town, so the night before we were due to go home DH quietly packed the car under a cover of darkness and we left quickly first thing in the morning without seeing them.
This kind of thing has happened to us abroad as well, one women once grabbed my book off me on the sunbed and said it was rude not to talk to herHmm. I was doing the hmmmm and ummmm and one word answers thinking she would get the hint and shut up. This couple even sent the kids over to us to play (we were childless at the time)
I just want my holidays to enjoy with my family, I don't want to make friends with people. The odd chat and hello fine but I don't go on holiday to find a best buddy. I know some people love to make new friends and that's fine but I wish they would realise that some people don't.

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Dollymixtureyumyum · 07/02/2016 20:06

Also the women is on mumsnet Grin

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Arfarfanarf · 07/02/2016 20:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

rosieliveson1 · 07/02/2016 20:15

Some people can't get the hint. Others don't actually get on as a family so need to cling to others. In this situation, where you're not already friends or family, I think it's ok to be polite but direct and say "I'm sorry but we want to be alone tonight/today etc" People may be surprised but surely can't react badly to that!

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iklboo · 07/02/2016 20:16

I used to hate 'getting in' with people when I went on holiday with my folks. They still do it now. They there's a few awkward emails / texts / phone calls when they get back because they insisted on swapping details. Awful.

DH's parents were the same. Now when we go away it's polite nods & smiles, but of chat at the dinner table then everyone off to do their own thing. If we bump into each other during the days it's a quick chat, 'see you at dinner'. Definitely no swapping details!

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QuiteLikely5 · 07/02/2016 20:17

Grabbed a book from you? Hmmmm

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iklboo · 07/02/2016 20:17

bit of a chat

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Dollymixtureyumyum · 07/02/2016 20:17

We did say that but they just tried again the next day. They had the hide of a rhino

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Dollymixtureyumyum · 07/02/2016 20:19

Yes grabbed a book Hmm

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SparkleSoiree · 07/02/2016 20:21

YANBU.

Going on holiday for us is much needed rest and relaxation with the kids or ourselves. We are always polite when people make conversation with us but we generally like to keep ourselves to ourselves.

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AnyFucker · 07/02/2016 20:25

I never speak to anyone on holiday. I actually refuse to let anyone hijack it. I will be actually rude if need be.

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bertsdinner · 07/02/2016 20:34

I don't make friends on holiday. I say morning and stuff but have no interest in meeting up/arranging trips with strangers.
I think I come across as an aloof/miserable cow, so people tend to leave me alone.
I once semi made friends with a Norwegian woman on holiday in Greece, she was really friendly and always said hi. There was a language barrier though, so it was confined to smiles and hellos.

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PlummyBrummy · 07/02/2016 20:35

This happened to us once and I was furious. The couple latched onto us for a whole week and we couldn't get rid of them. They were a right pair of dickheads - the woman made us sit on the front row during the comedian's set (all-inclusive) and heckled him and got all grumpy when she was the butt of his jokes for the rest of the night, FFS. We had another week to ourselves after they'd left but between them and the screaming family who got pissed by 9am, that was just a brief recuperation!

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ghostyslovesheep · 07/02/2016 20:37

YANBU - I holiday alone with my kids - people 'take pity' on me and try and be my holiday friends - I hate it - I'm not a fan of people anyway - much less so when I just want to read my book in peace

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AnyFucker · 07/02/2016 20:39

My DH is superfriendly and I am a curmudgeonly ole cow. I leave him to it.

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edwinbear · 07/02/2016 20:39

DH and I once went to a small tropical resort, where they used to put couples together on tables of four for dinner. DH and I used to hide behind a bush outside the restaurant to see if our allocated couple had eaten and left before we would go to dinner. We both loathe forced holiday friendships.

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whatsoever · 07/02/2016 20:50

That sounds like hell, YANBU.

We have made friends on holiday before (pre-kids) including a couple we visit/have to stay a couple of times a year who we consider good friends now.

However we'd NEVER try & get chatting to people unless it happened naturally and feel quite lucky we've never been set upon like this.

We did meet a couple on holiday in Greece about 10 years who had been latched onto by another couple. We went out for a meal with them one night & I remember them arranging to meet us really early so the other couple wouldn't be out yet and try to join us.

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ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 07/02/2016 20:52

This is why I wouldn't go to a park or resort with other people!

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rookiemere · 07/02/2016 20:53

I quite like striking up a chat if the people seem nice - and more importantly have children that DS can play with.

However I'd never intrude and force my company on others. Even when we go away with other families and share a villa, we all do our own thing during the day.

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Iwanttokillthem · 07/02/2016 20:53

Im antisocial too although not just on holiday.

Thankfully for all concerned Im blessed with a bitch resting face so no-one comes near to even try to make friends.

I can if I want to turn on the charm and make polite bus-stop conversation. But my inner bitch creeps out and the other party is usually happy to end our connection at that point. Im very happy at this .

Practice letting your inner bitch out. Its most refreshing.

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ootsideinbacktaefront · 07/02/2016 20:55

At home I am very friendly , on holiday I am so antisocial and would even be a bit rude if need be to preserve my peace Grin

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MrsGradyOldLady · 07/02/2016 20:59

You must have a friendly face.

I on the other hand must have more of a "fuck off" face.

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whattodowiththepoo · 07/02/2016 21:00

"I don't mind an hello" YABU you god damn communist heathen.

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LogicalThinking · 07/02/2016 21:00

I have absolutely no difficulty in ignoring people I don't want to socialise with.
I also find "no thank you" to be quite effective.

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vulgarbunting · 07/02/2016 21:03

I think you mean 'unsociable'.

'Anti-social' would be spray painting their caravan.

(Sorry. Not sorry.)

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AcrossthePond55 · 07/02/2016 21:04

Did they have Pampas grass in a pot by their caravan?

We RV and tend to be a bit antisocial. Don't mind exchanging a word in passing or having a chat standing around but don't really want to become 'instant besties' with virtual strangers.

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