DH nan is a cow

[PinkSlipperQueen]

DH nan at the weekend told me I need to shut my legs more as 3 kids is enough and before that said it's a mystery your so large with all the running around you do with 3 kids. All this after we paid for their lunch etc. Just feel a but shit about myself now. I'm a size 14 btw. She then invited herself and other family members for Christmas ar ours, all happened so quick I wasn't thinking and agreed to it. DH is an arsehole who said nothing.

[Birdsgottafly]

Would you say to someone "are you sure you haven't got Cancer?"
Because Dementia is as debilitating, if not more and is terminal.

[PinkSlipperQueen]

[Unreasonablebetty]

He dementia comments had me laughing out loud, maybe I could use them.
I have never described an old lady as this before, but she's a cunt. You are an angel for putting up with her.

[derxa]

Is she Catherine Tate's nan?

[PinkSlipperQueen]

Thanks guys x next time I see her which will be before Xmas I'm gonna say to her that she upset me and her comments were nasty. If she can apologies she can come on xmas if not she can fuck off

[Topseyt]

I would NOT have her round for Christmas.

Text or email her to rescind the invitation forthwith. Say you only want a quiet Christmas.

[Foslady]

'Yes cow bag nan, I am a size 14, but that's only because U've developed such a thick skin against your vile mouth'

[FluffyNinja]

YANBU. You really don't have to put up with such appalling rudeness.

Just ring her and say you and DH have decided to have a quiet family Christmas and she's (and any annoying hangers on) no longer invited.

No further explanations and no apologies.

[tobysmum77]

So DH now needs to step up and tell her she isn't welcome for Christmas.

[wowis]

yeah my nan was a nsty old cow too. Once when I was struggling with my first DC she said 'see...told you you should've had an abortion..'
so I totally get it.
I think you could absolutely pull out of christmas. Eventually my nan died so that was a relief for all. for you op. I found it helped to see the funny side . Nan-isms now are gold dust at a gathering.xx

[Strokethefurrywall]

Just call her out on it - she sounds like a vicious nasty fuck. Why would you allow that to poison your Christmas?
And, probably slightly harder, tell your DH that if he lets anyone disrespect you like that again then he can stay with his nan for Christmas instead of your family.

I have no witty comebacks because my response would be an immediate "what the fuck did you just say to me?" - and then it would be WW3...

[ouryve]

If she has a long history of being so unpleasant, then making digs about dementia are more than a little off, to be honest.

Tell her that you've had a think and you're still upset about her unpleasant and intrusive comments about our weight and sexual activity and that, on reflection she would not be welcome for Christmas day.

[ExBallerina]

Tell her you may be "large," but at least you're getting some.

Seriously, that's really mean and she should be called out.

[timelytess]

Start saying exactly what you think to her.
'DH's nan, you were a cow to me and you aren't coming for Christmas.'
Don't fall out with her about it, just be completely honest.

[AcrossthePond55]

I'd build on what Pico said: "Nan, I've been worried about you. After the terrible, nasty, awful things you said to me the other day I'm concerned that you may have the beginnings of dementia. Perhaps you should see your GP for a check?"

[helenahandbag]

That's outrageous! Why the fuck do some people feel like they can speak to people like that? Both of my grans are in their 80's and wouldn't dare come out with a comment like that.

[Pico2]

I'd suggest to her that this might be the beginning of dementia talking.

[Mypubesarestraight]

Put soap in a sock then wallop the cow!

On a serious note, your dh should have told his nan to shut up. Old age is no excuse for being rude!

[Whatevva]

Some people grow older and learn from experience that people are all different and become nice and understanding, and you can learn so much from them.

And some people don't.

As ppeatfruit says, I would forget it

[ppeatfruit]

She sounds like a mean drunk to me. Was she pissed? I 'd ignore it completely and 'forget' that you said that about Xmas.

[RedMapleLeaf]

Tell his grandmother that you're really hurt by her personal comments. Having got over your shock and able to tell her how you feel, you're sure she'll understand why you don't want to host them on Christmas Day.

Then tell your husband that you are hurt by his lack of concern and appreciation so he's in charge of Christmas Dinner this year.

[CreviceImp]

Personally I would fight fire with fire. She is choosing to be a horrible cah so can have a dose of being on the receiving end of it.

When she said you could shut your legs I would have responded saying it would be mightily preferable if she would just shut her mouth and keep the bile down.

When she went onto comment on the mystery of your weight I would have said the bigger mystery is how massive a cunt she is.

I don't think she would bother you after that and you wouldn't have to host the bitch either. Win -win.

[MackerelOfFact]

Start leaving care home brochures lying around and 'how to cope when a family member has dementia' leaflets.

If nothing else, it should remind her who will be choosing her nursing home...

[KinkyAfro]

Tell her to come by all means and that DH will be doing all the hosting and cooking - and take yourself off somewhere else.

Nasty witch!