Earlier this year I was ‘ghosted’ by a close friend and colleague. He has form for it and has caused me a great deal of hurt over the years but like a loyal puppy I’ve kept letting him do it again and again because I thought we were such good friends. Now we are in a situation where he will avoid me at work, blank me if he has to pass me, and if we’re in meetings together he won’t even acknowledge my presence. I don’t understand what I’ve done to bring on this bizarre behaviour, there was no argument, just a sudden overnight cease of contact. As I say, he has form, so at first I just waited until he decided to contact me again but that was 6 months ago.
I’ve recently discovered he has been off sick for a time and is looking to leave the company (I know this because he is on my LinkedIn, and it had gone from being dormant to suddenly having his CV, photo and full history/skills on there). Something tells me he was off with stress – I am massively reading between the lines but it's also based on other info I’ve got. Now I’m feeling guilty that perhaps I should’ve done something, or could still do something, and that maybe I just need to talk to him and be a mate. I’d hate him to leave and neither of us get the chance to ‘have it out’ or discover we were both just being deeply paranoid and stupid. I’m not really bothered about rekindling the friendship – I think I’m better off without it – but I can’t help feeling some sense of responsibility to him.
Everyone else I’ve spoken to about this has told me to just leave it. I’ve got a pretty difficult life myself and he hasn’t exactly been ‘there’ for me. WIBU to approach him in some way before he leaves for good? Or shall I let it lie and leave it up to him if he wants to speak to me?
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AIBU?
AIBU to approach this 'ghost' friend? (not an actual ghost)
12 replies
PetiteMere · 17/11/2015 13:05
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