To ask about nursery or childminder

[Shiningdew]

I am looking round some next week and thought I'd throw it out there tonight - which do you use and why? :)

[missymayhemsmum]

Childminder.
I would put a lot of store by meeting the CM's own children. If they are friendly, confident polite and obviously well cared for and parented you probably won't go far wrong.
Advantages- usually more flexible, more continuity and bonding, more real life - children go to the shops, park, meet other people etc and good childminders go to toddler groups etc so you get the bigger groups too. And most childminders will cope with a slightly ill child (eg kid with a cold needing a day of cuddles and cbeebies) whereas a nursery won't.

[Writerwannabe83]

Lol - my DH is a teacher so thankfully we don't have that nightmare issue.

We still send DS to his CM during the holidays though (2 days a week) because we have to pay anyway, he loves going, and my DH relishes the break

[Shiningdew]

True, although I wouldn't be able to get rid of them during school holidays

[Writerwannabe83]

The problem I have is that my CM is not in the catchment area for our local nurseries or schools so even if we didn't opt for nursery we'd still have to remove him from her care, and put him somewhere else so when he gets a place at a local school our childcare will also be based in that area

[hookiewookiedoodah]

Not necessarily Writer.Nurseries that are funded by the government ( e.g those attached to schools) don't charge parents any extra. CM's charge because, for those couple of hours ( sessions are usually 2.5 -3 hours), they can't take on another child to fill the space. I charge half fees for when a child is at nursery-and at my rates that only works out at ??1.75 per hour. Not exactly a fortune! I also take into account the travelling time there and back.

[hookiewookiedoodah]

Didn't mean that as it sounded Shining- think I was trying to say that if you get your heads together when it came to holidays then you could reach the best outcome with the least amount of disruption-although if you're a teacher then many 'minders offer term time only care so you probably wouldn't be charged during school hols (although some may charge a retainer).Whereas with a nursery you would still have to pay all year round.

[Writerwannabe83]

I don't particularly want to put him in a nursery, I don't like the thought of it at all, but part of me thinks he needs exposure to that kind of environment so that school doesn't come as a shock to him.

I understand that childminders can take the little ones to and fro nursery sessions but doesn't that then mean parents are having to pay CM fees and nursery fees?

My DS goes to the CM two days a week from 7am through to 5pm.

[hookiewookiedoodah]

Writer why do you think you need to take your little one away from a CM to put in a nursery when he's older? Many CMs do both-I have a little one who does 5 mornings at nursery then is with me in the afternoon. He'll then go to the local school and I will drop him off and pick him up. Most of my mindees are long term, and are siblings of others.One family has been with me for 9 years and I've had all 3 siblings since they were babies. We have a great relationship and they see me as their second home!

[Iwantakitchen]

Some childminders are term time only so you wouldn't have to pay during your holidays whereas you would have to pay all year round for a nursery

[Shiningdew]

Unfortunately I am a teacher so my holidays are fixed - it isn't about being clever!

[hookiewookiedoodah]

I've worked in a nursery and have been a childminder for the past 16 years. There are pro's and cons for both settings. There are good and bad nurseries and Childminders.
A nursery-opens nearly all year round,has larger groups of children, won't close if a staff member is ill,cost more than a Childminder, are not as flexible as a Childminder, can have different/big turnover of staff, staff (in my experience) tend to be quite young.Some children can't cope with the bigger groups at nurseries and settle better with smaller groups.
A Childminder-closes for holidays or sickness HOWEVER clever parents will book the same holidays to take away the hassle of finding other care and reducing their costs. I haven't had a days sickness in 16 years-I only had 2 weeks off when I gave birth to my daughter-but I have a couple of childminder friends who are my emergency 'minders if needed.I do offer funding BUT the issue is that most minders charge less an hour than the minimum wage, and, as many councils then pay less than THAT per hour for funding, there are a lot of 'minders who don't offer it. Minders have smaller groups of children,so get to know them better and form good bonds with them-which is a good thing because no parent would want their child to be with someone they didn't like! I get to know my families well so I find it easier to discuss any issues with them. I get together with other 'minder friends so the children socialise with others. Childminders tend to be more flexible-many work until 7 or 8 at night to accommodate families-and many start at 6 in the morning. It's easier for minders to go out and about as they only have small groups of children.Childminders are inspected by Ofsted and have to cover the EYFS which is the same framework as nurseries.I hold two Level 3 certificates,paediatric first aid, safeguarding and food hygiene.I do observations, assessments, learning journals and individual planning.
At the end of the day,go with your gut feeling. Visit different nurseries and childminders, and recommendations from others are always a good way of finding what you want. I sympathise greatly with parents looking for childcare as it's extremely difficult to put your trust in someone to care for your little one.Ironically,the reason I became a minder was because I didn't want anyone else to look after my son-he's 17 now and I'd happily give him away lol!!

[Writerwannabe83]

My worry about putting DS in a nursery when he's a bit older (he's currently 17 months) is that I will be removing someone important from his life. He has a great bond with the CM and that will only strengthen over the next few years so how can I then just take him away from her and put him in a nursery??

[Rosie55]

We've used both and can see advantages to both, though I'd favour a childminder if you can find a really good one.

One misconception I had, though, which pp have mentioned, is that nursery is more reliable because it stays open. In fact, we had to cover lots and lots of the DCs sick days when they were at nursery, but they picked up far fewer bugs at the CM. In two years she only had half a day's sick leave herself, despite having young children of her own and a health condition.

[Iwantakitchen]

I'm a child minder so have a different point of view. I think parents choose a child minder for younger babies as we do offer a more homely, quieter environment (I do anyway) and I am flexible to whatever parents want to do - from very laid back 'he sleeps when he's tired' to a strict regime 'she must sleep in the dark from 9.30 to 10.45'. Yes it's a pain when a childminder has to take time off because of sickness but in my experience, babies are exposed to less contagious illnesses in a small setting. When my two boys were in nurseries they were very often ill with eye infections, colds, stomach bugs etc. So often that I quit my job to look after them at home.

All of the families that I work for have decided to move their child part time to a nursery/pre-school when the child turned 3 or 4, with my full support and encouragement as I also think children benefit from learning how to deal with a larger and more varied group of children before they start school.

Feedback from parents as to why they like it here I basically because the children like it, it's a calm environment, I have time to play (a lot) with the children, I spend a lot of time one-to-one or two-to-one with them.

[WankerDeAsalWipe]

you need to use your instinct I guess. At least with a childminder you are dealing with the same person and you know who it is who will be looking after your child. With a nursery that person could change frequently.

If pushed I'd say that it depends on the age of your child, mine was only 4 and a half months so felt a childminder was more appropriate and was lucky as she was lovely and her own children were at school and she only had my son. for an older child then maybe nursery would be better?

[SpicedGingerTea]

I put my DS with a childminder when he was 9 months and I returned to work 3 days a week. He settled well and I too was attracted to the ideal of a small homely setting where he could become attached to one carer.

As he neared 2 I moved him to nursery. I hadn’t planned on doing this and had hoped he would stay with the childminder until pre-school. However, the things that attracted me to a childminder ended up being the very things that weren’t working for us in the end!

• Her house was small and I could tell he was frustrated with the lack of space to run about, especially on rainy/cold days. The CM didn’t have a car and didn’t take the children out much, apart from pick up and drop off for the pre school.
  
  
• I think he became fed up with the childminder and there was no alternative carer for him to go to at those times. Ditto some of the children to be honest, it simply didn’t offer the variety of setting and people that would stimulate him. I could sense he was stressed if she was,…….
  
  
• The service ended up being too personal. My childminder would text regularly and even called me a couple of times to discuss things (minor really) to do with my son. I wanted to pick him up/drop him off and not have to engage with her ‘out of hours’ as it were unless really necessary.
  
  
• Sickness. I struggled to cover when my CM was sick, which happened quite regularly.
  
  
• Too much focus on his behaviour if he was having a bad day. As he neared the ‘difficult’ twos I used to feel downhearted when I got a blow by blow account of what he’d done/not done that day. When he was just one of three, it would obviously stand out more. At nursery if he has a bad day or a grumpy day then he’s probably one of several and it’s not focused on so much (plus he seems to have less bad days because of several of the reasons above!).
  
  He settled into nursery brilliantly. Loves the additional carers, I think he gets greater stimulation there – more space, an all weather outdoor play area, more children. He is much less frustrated. He is eating a greater variety of food too (CM gave basic stuff which is fair enough).
  
  Obviously my CM experience may not be a good one, am sure they’re some brilliant ones out there.
  
  Nursery costs a lot more though!

[LieselVonTwat]

I don't think people move their children just for the sake of it emerald. It's to get them used to being in a group setting with lots of other children rather than a handful, prior to starting school. Many of us feel that has benefits, some of us have observed them in our own children.

If mine were doing a lot of hours already at a CM's and were settled there, ideally I'd keep them there for most of the week and just go to nursery or preschool from age 3ish for a few hours a week. Maybe a bit older or younger depending on the child. If that's not possible, particularly if you know you're going to need a CM for wraparound and/or holiday care for a few years once the child starts school, yes it may make more sense to simply leave them with a CM and ask that they go out to group activities sometimes. Obviously sometimes this will be contingent on which provider offers the free hours/the most free hours. But I do know someone who has done this and is happy with her decision. Her CM goes to a lot of playgroups etc.

[Tashakuf4]

My twin girls started nursery at one, initially there were with a childminder, but I couldn't see their development as much as I can see now that they go to nursery. Being around other kids is helping them. They are two now and tho they pick up the bad habits as well as the good ones, all in all I am happier with them at nursery.

[Thurlow]

Emerald, I think by 3, when kids get there free nursery/preschool place, most kids are ready for some form of larger group 'education'. DD was ready at 3.5 for that 'education'. Not all CMs will be able to do drop offs and collection at nursery, especially if they have older children to do the school run with, so you're left with a big decision to make.

I suppose an ideal situation would be keeping your lovely CM and having them do wraparound for the nursery hours, but that isn't always possible. In which case, a lot of parents will then change to a nursery instead as they want their children to be in that larger group setting.

Also, most CMs don't take the 15 hours funding so you have a big financial decision to make too. If you had a pretty much f/t CM place, you have to continue to pay them while your DC is at preschool/nursery. If you move to a private nursery, most do take the 15 hours funding and that can decrease your overall childcare cost considerably. And given that many parents might have a younger DC who needs childcare, that can be a big saving/

[Girlfriend36]

Emerald I didn't move my dd 'for the sake of it' in fact in my case she continue with the cm until she started school but I increased my hours at work and the cm couldn't accommodate them. I felt that it would be the best of both worlds for dd to go to nursery on those extra days.

I imagine most people have valid reasons for moving from cm to nursery if that is what they decide to do.

[Duckdeamon]

With respect to your comment that it's important that your childcare is there reliably every day (eg a CM might be ill), whatever form of childcare you decide on you need to plan for possibly numerous sick days for your DC and have plans for covering this, eg you and DH sharing the time off and seeing if your employers are Ok with you taking unplanned annual leave. Also bear in mind that it's rarely just a day: even a simple tummy bug can mean several days off childcare while you wait til 48 hours has passed since the last spell.

nurseries and CMs sometimes close on snowy days, eg due to staff not being able to get to work.

Nurseries are understandably strict on DC illness and will phone you to collect DC. don't get me started on people who stupidly and selfishly send in their DC with or hours after vomiting/diarrhoea.

[duggiecustard]

I would always choose nursery over childminder.

[HSMMaCM]

Emerald - lots of people move their children from CMs at 3. It depends on the CM and child. Mine all stay with me until they start school. I follow the same curriculum as nursery, have the same resources and we go out and they mix with lots of other children and still have low ratios of 1:3. I am also a qualified teacher.

My parents all say their work colleagues tell them they are doing the wrong thing and their child must go to nursery.

[EmeraldKitten]

I'm a little confused by those that are saying 'cm for young kids, nursery when they're older'.

Why? If you find a fab cm, why move them when they're 3/4/5 (or whatever age you class as 'older') to a nursery, just for the sake of it? Presumably they'll be at school anyway, if you're concerned that they need to spend time in a big room full of kids. I don't get it tbh.

DS1 is 7 and two boys in his class go to the local 'nursery'/daycare centre. He would be horrified if I suggested he go there!

[Girlfriend36]

I think op you probably need to go and meet some cms and look around some nurseries, you will soon get a feel for what is right for you and your baby.