To think that asking a Cleaner to do the dusting and hoovering would be pretty lazy on my part?

[Writerwannabe83]

I do not have a cleaner yet so I have no idea about Housework Ettiquette but when I return to work after maternity (in 6 weeks) the plan is for me to use one.

I'm putting together a list in my head of what jobs will need doing and I'm just wondering to what extent people go? Fair enough it makes sense to delegate cleaning the kitchen and bathrooms because they are time consuming jobs, but what about the little jobs? Surely doing the quick and easy things like polishing should still be something DH and I should be prepared to do?

So can I ask those with Cleaners how often you have them come round and what jobs they do for you?? And what general upkeep do you do yourselves inbetween their visits??

[whois]

One bed flat. Cleaner does everything in 2 hours. If we are away ask her to do something like windows or the inside of the fridge.

Why get a cleaner if you still have to clean?

[Doingakatereddy]

Me & DH both work FT, we have 3 bed semi & pay cleaner for 4 hours per week (£10 ph) and she does ironing, Hoover, dust, bathroom & kitchen. She's pretty good but the prospect of not having her fills me with fear.

We tried working without cleaner & spent weekends cleaning & evenings arguing about cleaning. Bloody awful

[raltheraffe]

writer what I used to do when I ran a domestic company was print the list out and then discuss it with the customer and then draw up a list of items based on the big list that they wanted and give it to the cleaner so cleaner was aware of what customer wanted.

[Writerwannabe83]

I like the sound of having a freshly made bed but I think we'd have to buy new pillows and mattresses before we allow anyone to see them uncovered

Don't get me started on the inside of the fridge. It is a 5ft high one and at its worst it is vile because of all DH's crap in there but it's always me who ends up cleaning it all out. Grr!

[bigTillyMint]

OP just hire a cleaner. If possible from personal recommendations from people you trust.

You will never look back.

[Writerwannabe83]

I don't know anyone who has a Cleaner unless people don't admit to it so I can't really go off recommendations.

I think I'm going to draw out a table containing the 24 hours of each day in the week and ask him to put a strike through the hours we can't do the housework I.e the hours we work, the hours we have got DS at home, the hours we sleep, thr hours where he goes to the gym three times a week, the hours where he goes to watch sport at the weekends etc - and then maybe he will see that realistically trying to find 4-5 hours a week to do all the housework is actually quite difficult.

Like I said, the only real free time we have is when we have the one day a week where we are all home together and I really don't want to waste that one precious day by spending it cleaning toilets and mopping the kitchen floor.

[Philoslothy]

Everyone on MN seems to have a cleaner and seems to assume that we can all afford one. We had one for the difficult stage of my pregnancy, but like most people it is not something we would normally choose to do. I don't like somebody else cleaning my home, I would be annoyed if my DH just hired a cleaner if I made clear that I did not want one. Howwver we have equal free time.

[Writerwannabe83]

I suppose my issue is that DH has made it clear he doesn't want a cleaner but at the same time he won't do any of the housework himself.

Therefore I think his wishes should be overruled

[vinoandbrie]

She (or he) will be working for you. Ask them to do whatever you need doing.

This can vary week to week as well, for example I always need full Hoover / mopping, all bathrooms cleaned, kitchen cleaned, all dusting done, bins emptied etc, but also tend to swap between getting some / all bed linen changed, and having ironing done, and having fridge / cooker / whatever deep cleaned.

They're your resource for the time they're on your home, don't feel 'I can't ask for this to be done' when it's a completely standard cleaning task, and you're paying a decent amount. Some don't clean the inside of windows, FYI.

[BallsforEarings]

You would definitely need to find out what their services include and what they don't at the beginning before you hire them - it's no use asking for things they don't include in their services.

They should be able to provide some kind of service list of what is included and what is additional and be able to let you know what is off limits within their services, some cleaners offer more services than others and they will all have different pricing structure.

[easylife73]

Like the OP I'm trying to persuade DH to consider us getting a cleaner, but he's not keen. We argue about cleaning more than anything else (and to be fair he does most of it!) Out of interest, what's the going hourly rate for a cleaner, and how many hours a week would it take to clean a largish 3 bed house?

[Writerwannabe83]

My DH is still having none of it

[Sparrowlegs248]

Hand him the pledge then writer

Seriously, what's his gripe with it? We don't have a cleaner, can't really afford one, but I def would in your circumstances (esp with only one family day a week)

As an aside, can't believe you're almost back at work! How time flies!!

[BallsforEarings]

easylife73 - There is no simple answer to what is the hourly rate since every cleaning business from the large franchise to the self-employed individual starting out must price as they mean to go on according to their business needs, if they price incorrectly for their business model they will not be around for long at that price as they will need to correct their error and price to stay viable as soon as they realise!

Comparing different models is like comparing apples and oranges as they all have differing pricing structures and different levels of service, its like comparing Mcdonalds with a 5 star restaurant but in the cleaning industry you dont always 'get what you pay for' there are many other variables at play.

Hourly rates vary from about £10 per hour per cleaner at the lowest end to around £25 per hour per cleaner (and upwards occasionally!)

You need to discern the value you will be getting versus the price quoted to you to find the right service for you, you can't just go for the cheapest and cross your fingers!

Obviously i am only including legal cleaning services here who are registered as self-employed, paying taxes and fully insured, the other kind are super risky to hire and more often than not cause damage to your property as have no training or insurance to their name!

[FrogIsATwatInASantaHat]

Why don't you book one for when you are at home? Then he won't know. I wouldn't normally advocate secrets and lies but tbh he sounds a bell end. Your husband that is.

[BallsforEarings]

Hahahaha I agree with Frogisa, book one OP! ;-)

[ElkTheory]

I'm all for joint decision-making in a marriage. But honestly, if he is not willing to pull his weight in terms of housework, I would insist on hiring a cleaner. It's galling that his solution to the problem is for you to do all the work. I would draw a line in the sand on this issue if I were you.

[DragonRojo]

my cleaners do everything: kitchen, bathrooms, hoovering, washing floors, polishing, window cleaning, ironing, put clean sheets on beds (i remove used ones)... Providing you pay him/her for the right number of hours, there is no reason why they shouldn't do cleaning related tasks

[BlinkAndMiss]

Ah Writer my DH was exactly the same as yours whilst I was on maternity leave, he seemed to think that once I returned to work then life as before DS would be reinstated and things would tick over. Only that didn't happen - of course. It wasn't until things got really bad that he agreed to a trial with a cleaner, we agreed that we would try someone for a month and then review whether or not it made a difference. Of course it did, he had no idea how much stress it took away until the trial. Once she started there was no way he was going to tell her not to come back.

Tell your DH you'd like to trial a cleaner to see how it works out, both practically and money-wise. Agree to a reasonable fee and find a cleaner who works for that fee and organise a list of jobs between you that you think you'd benefit from. Then agree on a timescale. Hopefully he'll be reasonable enough to agree to it.,

I'd second not going for a company. I got a quote from a well known company and I would have had to take on a second job just to afford it. I've got an independent cleaner who was just in the process of starting up her business when I contacted her, she was recommended to a friend on facebook who asked for a few recommendations. I just found her profile and sent her a message, she is amazing. Go for an hourly rate rather than a 'bespoke' service which charges per job.

[FrogIsATwatInASantaHat]

Fwiw i also run a cleaning company. I only do rental properties now but i started off on my own as domestic cleaner and i would do whatever was asked of me either housekeeping or cleaning. I was insured correctly too. Not all individuals are 'cash in hand under the table types '

[BallsforEarings]

No absolutely, I should have made that clear Frog - every legitimate cleaning business owner will have had to start up operating as an individual cleaner and some are happy to continue that way indefinitely as they don't want the headache of running a staff - these people earn a lot of money as they have few overheads and offer premium service, I have only just replaced the kind of income I earned back in the day when the money was all for me (and the taxman and insurance of course!!)

I think most people will know what I mean by the illegal side of the industry regardless of whether a person is running staff or not!

It is apparent when they need to be paid in cash, and cannot produce insurance documents for you that they are not legal, these would be unlikely to have a website and some will work for unrealistcally low rates, at the same time, some of these charge as much as we do much to my absolute horror!!

[frustratedashell]

I am a cleaner.I would say you ask your cleaner what she will do .
I do all the usual things plus put washing on,hang out washing,ironing. Changing beds and clean ovens.

[Writerwannabe83]

He keeps saying he doesn't want someone else in the house but I can't work out whether he means it or if it's an excuse.

I like the idea of an ultimatum with a months trial though.

I asked him yesterday when exactly all the household jobs would get done when I returned to work and he said he'd do them on the weekend day that he has DS whilst I'm at work. Yeah right. The reality is that he will clean the kitchen and think that constitutes 'doing the housework' and all the other jobs that need doing on a regular/daily basis will be left to me : hoovering, polishing, bathrooms, cleaning up, mopping floors, all the laundry, stripping and changing the beds and basically anything related to DS.

I think I will sit him down and do the rota and say that as soon as he stops doing his jobs or the MINUTE I feel like things are being left to me, then we are getting a cleaner