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AIBU?

To feel completely heartbroken.

15 replies

Adizzylass2014 · 08/12/2014 19:54

Apologies in advance, this is a little long.
My beautiful son of 15 has mental health problems and has been medicated since 2011 after being diagnosed with PTSD following witnessing his best friend drowning (they were both 12).
despite all hos various problems he has been doing ok and even achieved his bronze DofE award.
The last few weeks he has been acting bizarre and today had a complete mental breakdown, after an emergency appointment with camhs it is looking like he may be showing signs of schizophrenia, i'm heartbroken. He doesn't understand properly and I can't bring myself to tell him as he is already terrified of his own shadow.
We go back next week to get a firm diagnosis, it is the anniversary of my dad's death Wednesday and i'm struggling to hold it together, I feel so helpless, he is my baby. its so cruel that he was doing so well and then this has happened, he wanted to go to college to do carpentry but now his future hangs in the balance. Sad

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chinam · 08/12/2014 20:01

I'm so sorry that you are going through this. Some wise person will be along with advise soon but for now (flowers)

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Adizzylass2014 · 08/12/2014 20:02

Bless you, thank you x

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chinam · 08/12/2014 20:05

Crap, couldn't even get that right. FWIW my BIL has schizophrenia. He was diagnosed in his late teens. It was a very worrying time but he is married with kids now. He lives a really good life.

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KittyandTeal · 08/12/2014 20:10

How awful for all of you. That's quite a quick diagnosis of schizophrenia, are there any other possibilities?

Saying that schizophrenia is now very treatable, it doesn't mean medication for possibly the rest of his life but once they get the balance right he could quite happily lead a typical life.

It is cruel how life treats the innocent and the horrendous after affects of these situations.

Do you have support in place for now to deal with his breakdown and current mental state? One day at a time I guess.

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JaneFonda · 08/12/2014 20:12

Try not to worry too much OP - understanding and treatment of mental health problems are a lot better now than they used to be; he can still go to college and do whatever he wants to do.

It might take time for a correct diagnosis and appropriate medication to be prescribed, but this doesn't mean that things won't work out for him.

You sound like a lovely mum, and I'm so sorry that you've got so many worries at the moment - things will get better, honestly. Flowers

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littlejohnnydory · 08/12/2014 20:13

A diagnosis of schizophrenia must feel very frightening, it carries so many connotations - but please don't feel that your son's future is over. You are probably thinking that he will never recover or have a future involving a job, relationships, happiness and fulfilment but whilst I can't promise he will have those things it is definitely possible for many people living with this illness whose symptoms are under control. Having a diagnosis is a positive thing as it means your son can be treated appropriately. Many people respond well to antipsychotic medication. Young Minds have some good information and a helpline for parents.

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londonrach · 08/12/2014 20:14

(((Hugs))). You not alone in this. Do you have a friend in rl you can call. Sounds like your ds is getting the support he needs. One day at a time but you and your ds will get through this. Xxx

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Adizzylass2014 · 08/12/2014 20:17

His biological father is a schizophrenic and he has had issues with authority and school since reception. The catalyst was obviously what happened but he has diagnoses of adhd odd conduct disorder plus the ptsd, been on concerta xl and respiridone since 2011.
The doc is basing her findings temporarily on what he said today (hearing voices, convinced someone is coming to get us aĺl) and we had to fill in questionnaires.

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RaisingMen · 08/12/2014 20:18

I am so very sorry, firstly that your son went through such an horrific experience when he was younger, and secondly that you are both having to face a worrying and uncertain time.

As the above poster said, many people with schizophrenia lead full and happy lives and there is no reason your son will be any different. Although it must be terrifying, getting a firm diagnosis and a treatment plan in place as quickly as possible is extremely important and it sounds like you're in good hands.

You sound like an incredible mother, and your son is truly lucky to have you. Wishing you both the very best for the future Flowers

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Adizzylass2014 · 08/12/2014 20:20

Thank you so much for your kind comments, I shall look up young minds.
I have a fantastic OH and good friends, although I haven't told my friends yet I guess I'm worried that they may look at him in a different way!

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justmyview · 08/12/2014 20:22

This website has some helpful info - final paragraph on this page is quite encouraging. Good luck

www.youngminds.org.uk/for_parents/worried_about_your_child/schizophrenia/getting_help

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justmyview · 08/12/2014 20:24

Sadly, there is still quite a lot of ignorance about mental health although generally, people's attitudes are far better than they were in the past. They may look at him in a different way, but hopefully that would involve compassion and empathy

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Littleturkish · 08/12/2014 20:34

My brother had a schizophrenic breakdown and I can really appreciate just how terrifying it is. My heart goes out to you.

He has now at the grand age of 35 only had two episodes and manages without any medication at all. Treatment is truly excellent (although you do have to push to get it!) and his future is not all bleak, I promise.

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Greyhound · 09/12/2014 04:36

I'm sorry your son isn't well :(

It must be hard not to fear for him but all is not lost - I have manic depression and am able to live a normal life with thanks to my medicine.

Anti psychotics are very good these days.

Like your son, I have experienced paranoia, delusions and hallucinations - now, my illness is well controlled and I am well, happy, run my own business and love being a mum Smile and wife. I have a full social life.

Hope this gives you some reassurance.

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Out0fCheeseError · 09/12/2014 09:21

A close family member has schizoaffective disorder (some elements of schizophrenia, some elements of bipolar), has been psychotic, sectioned etc. Watching someone you love go through this is terrifying, bewildering, heartbreaking. BUT treatments are getting better, most people find some combination of medications that keeps them well and with the right support in place will go on to lead happy lives. Your son has the advantages of an early diagnosis and a supportive mother. We are now 10 months down the road and my family member is living independently, happy and thriving. I wouldn't have believed it was possible 6 months ago, things were so dark. But I hope my experience gives you some hope. Best wishes to you and your DS.

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