problem with colleague, want to be more resilient/tougher

[ManyBlessings]

Feeling utterly deflated and vulnerable today. I have started a new job and love it. Wonderful colleagues, friendly place to live (we are new in the country). Just one recurring/mounting problem. I have a colleague who has been 'off' with me from the start and things came to a head yesterday when she was quite aggressive twice in comments. I am new and finding my feet and really working very hard, and I've been in this sort of work for a long time so consider myself experienced and competent. I'm at the top of the career ladder (if that means anything!). The comment that really floored me yesterday was, when I asked advice (and I try not to lean on her if I can) she responded' I've told you this 27 times'. I don't think she has, but even so it was the tone and aggression - I don' t remember ever being spoken to in the workplace like this, felt infantilised and was completely wordless. Just crawled away. I think I am quite a soft person and my great failing is in some ways that I really want too much to be liked. I don't know what to do to make myself a little tougher. I don't think I can do much about the immediate situation apart from some avoidance but I wish I could be a little less affected by this sort of thing. Trying really hard to see things from her perpsective. I have a feeling she might feel undermined by my arrival as she is early in her career, she is quite unwell so may be the pain etc is not helping, I think part of her self identity is that she is a bit of a bruiser and may not mean it personally, but on the other hand I think I am a classic candidate for bullying, aggression. I never ever answer back or confront and am a conflict avoider but I really need advice about how to toughen up? I am sitting sobbing at my desk today feeling really broken which is terrible as I have every reason to be happy, grateful and thanksful for a very good life and all my luck.

[HamPortCourt]

OP I cannot claim credit for this, I am the sort of person who thinks of a witty comeback 5 days later if at all but a friend of mine is brilliant at this sort of stuff.

She started a new job and someone kept being bitchy to her. She just said to them, quite dismissively, "Christ I am surprised you keep your job if you are this nasty and rude to everyone" and just walked away. It did keep the bully off her back.

Agree with PP to take notes of incidents and log with manager if she persists being a bitch.