to not like people swearing in public?

[carlajean]

We had lunch outside a pub today. There were three guys at the only other table, which was very close to ours, and there was a fair amount of 'fucking this' and 'fucking that' going on. It was just me and my partner, no children, but I feel uncomfortable when people do this, and it spoilt what was otherwise a nice meal.
I swear myself, but not in those circumstances.
Perhaps we should have said something- but we didn't because we didn't know how they'd react.
Aibu to not like this, and would you have challenged them?

[ouryve]

I don't mind it in an adult environment. It bugs me when there will be kids around eg outside school.

[ArgyMargy]

Chances are if you'd said something they would have looked baffled. Some people have absolutely no idea that they use the f-word in every phrase and equally have no idea why it would cause offence.

[LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726]

I don't like it. It sounds horribly aggressive but I realise that for some, it's just a form of address and the words don't mean very much. When it's said with real aggression it makes me feel sick and cold inside.

I don't understand how people who swear manage to temper that in front of children. How does it not slip out sometimes? Also, people don't seem to mind swearing in front of children-at-large but they hate it and think it very wrong if somebody swears in front of their children. Somebody is always swearing somewhere so it's just going to be one of those thing.

[Bifauxnen]

I'm indifferent. Can't stop others but have taught dd it's not appropriate within my earshot or anyone who'll grass her up , so what can you do?

[ithoughtofitfirst]

I needed to read this.

I really REALLY want to stop swearing. Especially in public and especially if it makes people feel like OP did at the pub.

Mid year resolution.

[SqueakySqueak]

I'm of the opinion that if you're going to swear, mean it. Don't just use it as a filler like "Uhm" and "like".

[MysteriousCircusZebra]

I hate it, especially when I've got the kids with me. I wouldn't care so much if they weren't there. Theres not much you can do though. Is there?

[deepest]

ithoughtof....same I swear loads as a filler - rarely in anger - but I really want to stop but it is so hard I am a bit overly expressive and giddy and it just comes tumbling out -- need to try harder

[sykadelic]

It makes me wince. God forbid we actually care about how other people feel and limit our "freedom of expression". :S

[GoshAnneGorilla]

YANBU, I wouldn't like it either.

[OldLadyKnowsSomething]

NannyOgg said, "Not that long ago language would be tempered due to the setting and the audience." I agree, I don't swear in front of my mother or my dgs, and I would never swear in (the) Church (I no longer attend) but not that long ago a pub - even a pub garden (which is, of course, where smokers are now sent, and that pisses off parents too, but only on nice days) - was not viewed as a "family-friendly" place. The pub, even 30 years ago, was an adult place, where adults did adult things, like drink and swear. Now, practically every establishment has to be open to practically everyone; this is a step forward, but equally means that sometimes dc (or even adults!) are going to hear sweary words.

They'll also hear them in the street, on the buses, on trains, and anywhere else that isn't exclusively for young dc (and they'll probably hear them there too, sometimes, by accident.)

If you find yourself with elderly parents or young dc, sitting close to sweary people, move.

[GoshAnneGorilla]

Pubs are one thing, but as for public transport, the clue is in the name: public. They are for everyone to use and the language used on it should be generally acceptable. Is that so hard?

I don't see why I should have to move because someone's got the vocabulary of a Viz comic

[MissBattleaxe]

YANBU.

I tell my children that people swear "like that man in the street" because they can't think of any better words.

It also sounds very aggressive when its used constantly throughout speech. Me and the kids were sitting on a bench recently and a gang'o'lads stood next to us and the language was terrible. The thing is, he was just telling a normal anecdote.

"So I fucking said to him, fucking buy the other fucking car, don't just fucking hang on to it" etc.

Forgive me for saying this but he sounded pig ignorant, aggressive and thuggish. I hate that its sort of become normal and I hear it all the time.

I've no objection to someone hissing "FUUUUCK" when they bang their head on the tumble drier door though when the kids aren't around. Ahem.

[CatKisser]

I used to a see a bloke when I lived in a Not Naice town down South and he used Fuck as punctuation like the chap in MissBattleAxe's post. I never noticed it down there as it was just the norm.

I moved away to a smart town and he came to visit. We went out for some lunch and he was talking non stop with a Fuck every other word. Whereas it hadn't bothered me before, I was DYING in my seat, I could see people looking over. Not good.

Surely almost everyone swears, but most have,got the common sense to know here it's hugely inappropriate.

[Pagwatch]

I don't like swearing as punctuation. I don't like 'like' as punctuation.

[FatherDickByrne]

Flipping is the default swear word on Coronation Street.

[mrssnodge]

My Dp swears a lot, but does 'curb' it in public and with my mother lol! However Iv noticed when hes had a few drinks he stops- my son in law is a terrible swearer and I cringed at my last bbq, as the neighbours could over hear all the bad language,( Im not a snob honest) but as the time and the booze flowed, they both stopped swearing?/ Is it a lack of confidence thing, dont know what other words to express themselves, and with a few drinks they found it easier to express themselves but with a few drinks they both stopped swearing completely!!!

[dawndonnaagain]

MissBattleaxe
I can think of plenty of words to use, and frequently do, they also include the swear words that have been used for centuries. Sometimes a swear word is the better word.

[Smilesandpiles]

Earphones. Honestly, plug yourself in to a set of those and listen to music instead.

[SirChenjin]

The odd swear word to enhance humour I have no problem with - so long as there aren't children within earshot. I'm a potty mouth, happy to swear with the best of them.

What I cannot stand is the mindless, pointless, ignorant use of swearing in everyday conversation without any consideration for anyone around you "so I was like, that's too fucking expensive mate, and he was fucking like, well, don't fucking buy it then, go down the fucking street and see if they've fucking got it cheaper" - or even worse, the screeching parents to their young children "Kelsey, ah'm nae fuckin' tellin youse again, get fuckin o'er here noooo, righ', or I'll fuckin bel' yer fuckin arse"

[WorraLiberty]

What SirChenjin said. It's fine to enhance humour, or if you're really angry.

But people who can't get a whole sentence out without swearing, just come across (to me) as very unintelligent.

[LePetitPont]

Yy to missBattleAxe. My DH an I swear quite a bit, but it will be carefully chosen / timed for comic effect, used to exaggerate or emphasis a specific point.

It's the causal every other word that can come across as aggressive and uneducated. Which is what sounds like the op was sat next to in the pub garden ( Nb pub = public house, surely? Not private adult space house?).

[LePetitPont]

Cross posts with worra and SirChinjin

[WorraLiberty]

My ex FIL drove me mad like that. If you took all the swear words out of the English language, he literally wouldn't be able to speak.

He'd even pronounce 'fucking' in the same way you'd say 'and then errr...' if you're trying to remember the next part of the story.

So...

The fuck- ing mechanic said the car needs new fuck- ing brake pads. It's going to cost fuck- ing shit loads on top of the fuck- ing other repairs.

[blueshoes]

How is it not 'common' to be unable to string a sentence without profanities in it?