aibu to think this school should let my ds get the SCHOOL bus?

[Doubtfuldaphne]

ds was issued a free bus pass on the basis that the nearest school is full. Now it turns out the bus is for 6th formers only and they want me to tear up the pass and for him to get on public transport (new pass provided for this)
He's only 13, a little naive and shy. Never been anywhere without me really.
They want him to leave at 7am to get two connecting buses to school. He won't get home until 5pm as he'll have to wait around the town centre for the next bus back to our village.
Before moving to this village, we were told the bus would be an option as long as he had a pass.
I don't drive..I can't afford to. I have no other way of getting DS to school now.
The council are blaming the school and the school are blaming the council. Now the EWO is saying that getting a public bus is perfectly reasonable.
I'm pulling my hair out here!

[Berryglitter]

Oh it's one of those threads..

Op: Aibu?

majority: yes, yes you are being unreasonable. Here's some valid suggestions and questions.

Op: No I'm not, have some extra information. ×op ignores questions and suggestions*

... Enter one person who agrees...

Op: addresses every point the person agreeing say, still ignoring every other suggestion or question.

[bucketofbathtoys]

As far as I know all 11 year olds are deemed capable of negotiating buses, trains, tubes etc. I did 2 buses and several miles journey from 11 ...way before mobile phones etc. is this not an important rite of passage as they transition to high school ???

[DoJo]

It appears so Berry - makes me wish I hadn't tried so hard to understand the OP's concerns and offered helpful suggestions for ways to manage them. Them's the breaks though!

[MyFairyKing]

YABU. What are the specific reasons apart from timing (its 5 pm, not 10!) that he can't get public transport?

[Purplehonesty]

I don't agree with everyone else either so here's no 2!
I think that's a really long day for him and I wouldn't want my 13yo taking two buses to school and walking by himself. But it seems like you, I am in the minority.
Could you taxi share with the other 5 kids who take taxis? Perhaps negotiate with the taxi firm or something?
I agree its silly when there is a perfectly good bus going to the school from your village and I would rather my son went with older school pupils than random strangers.
6th formers in my school were also lovely and looked after the younger ones. If it was with younger teens then yes they aren't always so kind.
You may have to fight the school/council on this.

[Berryglitter]

Very true Dojo. You never know how the cookie will crumble. Hopefully your advice may sink in.

[LumieresForMe]

But this is NOT what the OP was told before she moved to that village. She was told there would be a bus.
Now she lives there but us told that actually no he has to use public transport with a very long journey, long wait in the town centre etc.
I rounding have an dude with my dcs doing that as such but the wait in the town centre at night in winter? I wouldn't be happy about it. Well not where I live.

And the OP also mentioned that one child is already using the bus even though he is not in 6th form. Why??

[MostWicked]

There are about five from this village going to the school. They've all raised similar concerns but they must be rich as they pay for taxis every day.

The why don't you discuss the matter between you and all club together to book a daily taxi. The cost split between you would be much lower.

[LumieresForMe]

Sorry.
i would have NO issue with my dcs using public transport as such

[Hakluyt]

So when you rang the school and asked why the bus was for 6th formers only, what did they say?

[ThatBloodyWoman]

I haven't read the thread, but if his catchment school is full, then it isn't the pupils choice to travel.

I assume public transport would need to be funded by the parents but the bus would be free.

So long as the catchment school was put as the first choice, and not allocated because of lack of places available, I don't think its unreasonable not to expect to make a complicated and expensive journey to attend school .

[ilovesooty]

never been anywhere without me really

At 13? Assuming he doesn't have SN , are you serious?

[ElephantsNeverForgive]

Yes I do wonder if the council want to do away with the contract bus or at least not provide any more fir younger pupils.

Sixth formers pay and generally behave.

If they have a reasonable deal with the oublic buses it may be cheaper, it's certainly easier.

If a badly behaved DC is thrown off a public bus, thats that. Contract school buses are a dreadful grey area.

No one wants at school wants to take responsibility for bad pupil behaviour or Bus company incompetence.

Even as an academy buses are the councils problem.

The council just want them to be cheap. The fact that a lot of the behaviour issues would go away if DC spent 15 minutes on a direct minibus not an hour on a ridiculously oversized coach doing a stupid route round tiny lanes doesn't bother them.

[magpiegin]

OP- have you spoken to the school or the other parents who send their kids from the village.

We also may be able to help if you tell us why he doesn't go places by himself and what you are worried about with the journey?

[SapphireMoon]

I think most people being very harsh on the op.
Definitely try and check what other villagers in the same situation do; taxi sharing may well be the answer here.

[steppemum]

in sept, ds, aged 11, will cycle to the station (10 minutes) lock his bike up at the station, get on the public train (30 minutes) and then at the other end walk up the road to school (15 minutes)

he will leave home at 7:30 and return at 4:40

yes, we chose this, knowing the transport issues, but it is fine.

The only thing in your posts that I would have sympathy with is the long day, which is hard, but do-able (I did it at his age) and the fact that another child has a pass on that bus, which I would use as a point to challenge the council (possibly legally?)

and I disagree with pp, I would rather he was on one bus than 2, just for convenience, but wouldn't be worried about the sixth formers

[Hakluyt]

Obviously, a NT 13 year old should be able to make a journey like this after a bit of practise. But the point is, why should he when a bus stops outside his door?

OP- what is the official reason you have been given for your child not being able to get the bus?

[TillyTellTale]

Why is everyone assuming a bus full of sixth formers will be awful? Things may have changed, but sixth form students who have chosen to continue at sixth-form are generally less hellish on a bus and mature than secondary-aged pupils!

I wouldn't want my child taking a overly long journey with lots of changes, when they could get a direct bus there, either. He has to leave at 7, get home at 5pm, and then do his homework? Not ideal, is it?

[TillyTellTale]

*and more mature

[PeterParkerSays]

OP, the other child who catches the 6th form bus who's under 16 is a red herring in this. There will presumably be some specific factor relevant to them that a) doesn't apply to your son or he'd have also been given access to the bus and b) is confidential to that child. It could simply be that their dad drives the bus!

I agree with other posters about you clubbing together for a taxi with other parents if you're not happy with public transport as an alternative.

[Nomama]

1. The bus the FE/VI formers are on is paid for from a separate budget and/or the kids on it pay for the service. The school may have no rights to claim a seat on it at all.
   

1. There are empty seats as it passes your village, it may well be full when it gets to the school
   

1. Kick up a fuss with both school and LA
   

1. The long days are a consequence of your choices, you may find that, as other parents seem to have, the school and LA aren't very sympathetic.
   

I also think that public transport and extended days are just part of growing up. I lived rurally at that age and my day was similar to your DSs.

[londonrach]

Unless he has sn I don't see the problem. He's 13 not 3. I'm surprised he hasn't been on the bus by himself. If concerned do some dummy runs with him and then on his own. I think you find this might be the making if him, giving him confidence. Dealing with buses is an important skill to learn and has a mother you should be encouraging his independence in a safe way which this us. Are they any others reading the public bus he can tag along with for the first few times.

[jacks365]

My daughter's sixth form has a minibus service which would exclude your son simply because it has to be paid for. It is mostly used by sixth formers because they aren't provided with a free pass by our council. It isn't arranged by the school but some parents who got together to arrange it because it works out cheaper than the public bus service for them. It is easier to think of it as a taxi rather than a bus service although it is a minibus. The children eligible to use it are issued a pass but the key thing is that the pass has to be bought you can not use it for free travel. Find out who arranged the bus service how it is funded and what the criteria are for using it.

[Heels99]

Are you sure the taxis aren't funded by local authority? Kids at our school who live far away get funded taxis. Can you speak to the parents of the children who get the taxis and find out if your son could join in the taxi arrangement, who funds it, what cost would be etc?