to think you shouldn't get a full night's sleep if you have newborn quads

[ReputableBiscuit]

This thing on ITV about Quads - the dad sleeps all night every night, while the mum and Grandma get 2 hours sleep a night in between feeding 4 babies. He's taking the piss, right? Apparently it's because he has to work in the morning. In sales, btw, not brain surgery.

[gimcrack]

You do what works for you. And remember, it's a TV show that needs to create a narrative for a one hour slot. It makes for better telly if they don't show the neighbours taking over daytime feeds so Sharon and Sandra can nap.

[Rosebug258]

The bloke seems to be doing his best, that's all anyone can do really. 4 babies must be exceptionally hard for everyone.

In our house Monday-Friday I do all the night feeds, getting up etc and Friday and Saturday my dh does it, it works for us I have a good nights sleep on Friday we are now coming to the end of that tho as ds sleeps from 7.30-5.30 at night so going back to being in the same room.

I would consider asking him to do all night feeds as selfish as he works very hard in a very demanding job (go to prison if he fucked up) also his wage means I don't have to work again till the kids go to school. I appreciate this doesn't work for everyone but it works well for us each to their own and all that.

I think I'm very lucky to have the set up I have. But again it's down to the families envolved I also think that with any tv programme it's editited in a way to make you think bad of people.

[PhaedraIsMyName]

Another vote for password I really don't think it's unreasonable the only person bringing in a wage should get to sleep on work nights.

[Szeli]

I wish I'd seen this; my friend had identical quads and her husband left her at six weeks (with two others) - that's a twat. This guy doesn't sound so bad.

My OH couldn't wake in the night if he tried - and he did, so for the 2 months before DS was sleeping thru we pulled shifts. I did 9pm-5am asleep whilst DS and OH were downstairs and after the 1am feed they came to bed and OH lyed in whilst I did morning feeds. Perfect for us, I imagine we'd have done the same with multiples because it worked in OUR house

[Koothrapanties]

I only have one baby, so clearly have no idea what it would be like with quads. However, dh and I have a similar arangement. He stopped helping with the night feeds when he went back to work. He works in quite a dangerous job and could seriously injure himself if he was sleep deprived. This would leave us without any income, and dh probably much less able to help with dd anyway!

You have to find what works for you. If I have a bad night with dd, dh will get up earlier than normal to let me catch up a bit, and I take back over when he needs to leave for work. It's all about give and take and compromise and i think they have done really well.

[TheFairyCaravan]

I don't get this thread at all.

I watched that programme last night and the family looked really happy, they had a system that worked for them and weren't bickering. So why are so many women pissed off on the mother and grandmother's behalf (when they weren't pissed off themselves) because the men were going to bed at night?

I've had 2 kids DH didn't do the night feeds because they were breastfed. In the very early days he changed nappies, got me water etc at night, but when he had to be at work at 7am I let him sleep. 'Twas nobodies business but ours!

[Bowlersarm]

Applauds password.

[balenciaga]

Applauds soon to be six.

[Dontforgetyourbrolly]

Someone has to pay the bills with all those mouths to feed.

[SoonToBeSix]

Password your post was rude I am not selfish I just believe dh and I should share the workload as we our both our dc's parents. Maybe you are happy to have your role as a mother under valued as less important than your husbands job but I am not.

[passwordchange]

So many selfish mums on here! I did all the night shifts when DD was a baby, as DH has a very stressful and hard job and he needed to not be tired to be able to do it. I never once thought he wasn't pulling his weight. He cleaned the house, cooked all the meals, looked after me and DD. much like the father of the quads on this program.

Just because some mums feel that because they are awake, then DH should be awake as well doesn't mean that other families can work equally well with the person who has to earn the money to pay for the roof over their heads being able to get a decent nights sleep.

[Artandco]

I think now they are 1 year though and from about 6 months they could easily nap in day. Get babies into routine so say 9-10, 1-3 daily the nap, then at least one person can nap properly each nap with one dozing incase they woke.

I don't have quads, but in my house right now 2 month old twins, 2 year old, 3 year old and 4 year old. Dh is having bath with 3 year old. 2 and 4 year old playing with duplo, and twins laying on playmat happily. I'm on mn doing nothing. By 9pm all will be in bed. The twins fed at midnight by one of us in 20 mins, and then first wake 7am ish. 5 children age 4 and under and we have time to ourselves daily.

Why does it take 4 hours for x2 people to feed the quads? Apart from when tiny and prem, surely one person just takes x2 babies each and feeds x2 at a time? So 12pm all babies are feeding. X2 with the mum, x2 with grandma. By 12.30/1pm everyone's back asleep until 4pm. So 3 hrs sleep between each feed. Just seems they made more work than neseccary

[Writerwannabe83]

I don't get a chance to nap in the day with 1 baby, let alone 4!

[SoonToBeSix]

Ilike hugs she has quads she can't nap in the day.

[ILikeWarmHugs]

I think the arrangement they had was fine and well thought through. Mum had the support of the Grandma over night so she wasn't having to sort 4 babies alone. Plus mum can nap during the day, dad can't if he's at work. It seemed like they both worked bloody hard, with dad even emptying the dishwasher at 3 am sometimes! Dad's job isn't more important than mums but it is still very important, if dad lost his job they'd be screwed.

[happycamper80]

I really enjoyed it. I think he was pretty hands on and as long as he was helping out at night on non working days than it's fine.
Although I do still hate the way the childcare role is devalued. A sahm can be too tired to drive apparently because she has no need to go anyway on a day she is too tired apparently. Well you can have appointments etc that you have to attend and waves of tiredness can hit without warning.

[Damnautocorrect]

As for the court case. Given that I wasn't involved, wasn't a judge or juror. I haven't had access the evidence it's really not for me to pass comment or judgement.

[ComposHat]

Ffs..it isn't like he's spending all day wanking and eating pot noodles. He's thwhole earner suppoting six of them.

He works in sales. I imagine a lot (if not all) of his income is commission based and may involve a lot of driving.

If he can't do his job and as a result doesn't earn a penny as he's too tired to sell effectively what happens then? Or god forbid fall asleep at the wheel. ..

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

new poster Scouser?

[Damnautocorrect]

I didn't think they looked broken. I thought they looked very well considering!!
I also don't think he's a twat he did weekends.
Thank goodness her mums able to help so much they are very lucky. Grandma looked like she was very much enjoying it to me.
Loved grandad just going on for the ride!! Also thought the sleep deprived spoon moan was quite funny.
Very lovely family I thought.

[SoonToBeSix]

It was 2008 there must be a verdict by now

[TwinkleTwinkleStarlight]

Scouser not scouts -stupid autocorrect

[TwinkleTwinkleStarlight]

Scouts we there is no verdict on that link

[Scouser78]

Because he still lives in the same house

[SoonToBeSix]

Twinkle the 3am dishwasher I imagine was at the weekend and it may well have been a one off.