To not expect my 13 month old to feed himself?

[Dietagainmonday]

My ds attends nursery twice a week. He is now in the group 1-2 year olds and is now expected to feed himself. I've always encouraged him and he usually grabs the spoon off me but I try to make sure he has a decent portion before he takes the spoon and gets dinner all over his face, hair, the walls floor. Have I babied him to much or is the nursery having to high expectations? he is the youngest in this group at the moment. Yesterday they had beef dinner for lunch and chicken curry for dinner and was told he ate it all but this morning I gave him Weetabix he managed about two spoonfuls with difficulty then the rest went on the floor. He's fine with finger food but not great with a spoon.

[HappyAgainOneDay]

Better weather coming. Feed your youngsters outside and they can 'help' you with their own spoon. Leave it to them sometimes and don't worry about the mess because the birds will clear that up for you.

[noblegiraffe]

My 14 month old has been feeding herself with her fingers since she was 6 months, I used to feed her yoghurt by loading the spoon and giving it to her to put in her mouth. The last couple of weeks I have been giving her the spoon and the pot and she can feed herself it now (some still goes down her front!)

She has on the odd occasion stabbed some food with a fork, but is still mainly picking it up with her fingers. For breakfast she has shreddies rather than Weetabix because she can pick them up, although she will have a go with a spoon.

Perhaps you could start by loading the spoon and giving it to him, rather than directly feeding him?

[ThisFenceIsComfy]

Managing to spoon feed well at 13 months? God no I wouldn't expect that at all. Managing to feed himself with fingers? Yes totally. I wouldn't be spoon feeding a 13 month old all the time and I would let him have a go using a spoon where possible. If he only manages two mouthfuls of yoghurt for example then help him after. Weetabix could always be given with less milk so it's not so mushy and give him a spoon. Is he good with finger feeding?

[ChishandFips33]

I guess it depends on the child and their previous experiences. You might need to chat further with the nursery, maybe by saying you'd like to follow their lead at home to help his skills and ask them to walk you through what/how exactly he eats - this may then flag up that it's not all cutlery feeding but fingers are used too, food over the table etc

Out of interest, would anyone think a 21month old is capable of pouring their own drink into a cup from a small jug?

[grabaspoon]

I used to run the 1-2 room of a nursery and yes when you have 10 1 year olds at a table you can't feed them all, however they all copy eachother and have a good go at feeding themselves, obviously we help them scoop up food and encourage good manners but basically at 14 months we expect them to try and feed themselves.

Breakfast - wheetabix, rice crispies or toast is easy enough
Lunch - we would chop everything down so they were basically scooping it onto a spoon
Dinner - sandwiches, soup, beans on toast, again all easily to feed.

[3DcAndMe]

As above poster said, on a 1-3 ratio you cannot feed each baby

My dd is just turned one and feeds herself all meals. She mainly uses her hands. Yes she flicks it about a bit but I just make sure I give her enough so that if she throws some on the floor she still has some to eat

[grabaspoon]

Yes Chish and Fips I would be encouraging this - some wont be able to = but a small bit of water in a childs jug and a big cup it's doable :)

[ThisFenceIsComfy]

ChishandFips yeah I think they would be capable but I wouldn't expect it to be 100% spill free

[80sMum]

Grabaspoon if you have 10 one-year-olds in the room, should't there be at least 5 adults in there too? Feeding 2 one-year-olds each is doable surely?

[grabaspoon]

80's Mum ; Regardless of how many staff you have - children of this age are developmentally able to attempt to self feed themselves.

With 1 year olds you have a 1-3 ratio so you would have 4 members of staff - 1 will be setting up the sleep area, another will be changing nappies of the children who have finished, 1 may be dealing with parents and helping the last supervise the meal.

[3DcAndMe]

10 one year olds would be 4 staff not 5

You might have a baby needing a bottle which takes over one member of staff. Someone will likely have a quick tidy round the room too

Learning to self feed at 13 months old is not ridiculous

In my setting we start bits of self feeding from 6 months and by about 9 months they are usually very good at picking up and eating food

[OohOod]

Ds is 12 m and using a fork/spoon quite well now but still uses his hands to help. Started BLW at 6m just using hands he managed to eat a lot.

[DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen]

Chis-yes, but I'd expect done spills if the cup was a plastic beaker.

As far as I can remember ds didn't want my input at all at meal times