22% of UK population...

[monkeymamma]

'Wouldn't attend a wedding if it was between a same sex couple' according to Newsnight. I mean what the actual fuck? I don't know a single person who would say this. To me anyway. Apart from being vile homophobia it's so... Illogical. I just don't get how anyone could have a problem with two people getting married. AIBU?

[Thumbwitch]

I'd like to know the percentage who wouldn't accept a wedding invitation at all as well. It might be a complete red herring, the "between same sex couple" - some of them might have just refused on principle because they don't agree with marriage at all.

[ComposHat]

If this is the case I want to go to a same sex wedding as soon as possible please. Imagine, a wedding where all the bigoted, boorish tossers actually opt out.

You can actually talk to guests safe in the knowledge that you won't have to listen to a rant about the EU, immigration or PC gone mad. As it will be a self selecting bunch of liberal fair minded types.

[picnicbasketcase]

I've only met one person so far who has said they object to gay marriage. They have no problem with civil partnership, just the word 'marriage' being used when it's not one between a man and a woman. Makes no sense to me at all, quibbling over what the name of it is. His argument was 'if they can have the ceremony and it's legally recognised, why do they have to use the word marriage?' Well why shouldn't they? It is one. Bizarre.

[ormirian]

Would 22% refuse to go to a random gay wedding. Probably. Would 22% refuse to go the wedding of someone they know or like because it is a gay wedding? I doubt it.

[scottishmummy]

Not,me.id go to any knees up,I'm great at weddings
Smile,cry,mingle

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

YABU for not seeing why some might have a problem with a change as radical as gay marriage. There's a serious moral objection from certain religious groups which probably counts for a lot of that 22%. Then there are quite a few (older) people around who formed their opinions at a time when homosexuality was not only frowned upon but illegal. Add another swathe of those who are prejudiced against anyone who doesn't look, sound or act exactly the same way that they do and 1 in 5 sounds reasonable. I'm sure the number will come down over time.

[C4ro]

I hope to Jeff none of those 22% are friends of mine. I would expect it includes a few of my "tolerant", "loving", Christian relatives though.

[Sunnymeg]

I have always believed that this nation isn't as tolerant as it makes out. Many people will quite happily ignore the subject of gay marriage because it doesn't effect them. However if an invite turned up on their doormat it would become a real issue and they wouldn't want to have anything to do with it.

[MsMischief]

There is a lot less than 22% of the population who class themselves as 'regular church goers' and all the surveys last year when it was being discussed in parliament showed that less than half of active church goers were opposed to marriage equality. Some of us are even LGBT ourselves. I know a few Christians who are letter writing oppositionists to equality and more who find it all unnecessary and think civil partnerships were fine but I don't think many in the latter group would actually refuse an invitation from a person whose wedding they would go to if they were straight. The former group probably isn't even 22% of the church, let alone 22% of the population. There are other faiths of course but Christianity is the biggest.

[Gileswithachainsaw]

It is shockingly high. It's usually friends and family invited to weddings are people really friends with that many people who wouldn't approve of their same sex marriage?

Makes no sense at all.

[thecatneuterer]

It doesn't surprise me. I'm a landlord and I specialise in offering gay houseshares. And the reason I need to offer specifically gay houseshares is that so many people refuse to houseshare with a gay person. So homophobia, in housesharing at least, seems to be alive and well.

However, from what I have gathered, those who object are much more likely to be male than female, and are much more likely to come from other countries - Africans, Muslims and Russians/Eastern Europeans particularly, or are second generation Muslim, and are more likely to be working class than middle class.

And probably (although they are unlikely to be in houseshare market), homophobes are more prevalent among the over 60s than the under 60s.

So if you take the UK population as a whole that percentage probably isn't that surprising. If though you tend to mix in a mainly middle class, youngish, British/European-born demographic, then it will seem to be remarkably high.

[Gileswithachainsaw]

Needless to say, I would NOT be among them!!

[Nancy66]

I'm not that surprised. Turn the figure on its head and it means that 78% would attend. That's a big majority.

[Chelvis]

I'm not that surprised to be honest. If it was, hypothetically, an imaginary cousin on my dad's side, I doubt very much that my grandparents would go. My uncles wouldn't. My dad probably wouldn't. My male cousin wouldn't, neither would either of my female cousin's partners I think, and probably not one of my female cousins. I suspect it would just be my sister, aunt and one female cousin attending, and probably not the cousins' children as their dads wouldn't be happy. So 9 wouldn't go, 3 would (out of the adults). So 75% of the family wouldn't attend.

That's edge of a rural area council estate though in an area where non-whites are not welcome. I imagine the responses were very different in a middle class, mixed, urban area though.

[Chelvis]

I apostrophised badly when referring to my female cousins' partners. I have two female cousins, each of whom has a partner. I don't have a female cousin with two partners!

[katese11]

Has anyone seen how many people they surveyed? 1007!! That's roughly the number of people on one rush hour tube train. How does that represent the UK population??

[ClockWatchingLady]

Yeah, this bemuses me, too.

What the hell do we (as a society) think marriage is about? Who has the right to decide who can and can't do it?

(on the other hand, I'm starting to think marriage and weddings are a bit bonkers in general, for any kind of couple, so a general boycott seems reasonable...)

[monkeymamma]

Katese thats astonishing. So many 'studies' cited by the media these days are absolute tosh. But it's still alarming anyone would have an objection to gay marriage. A lot of people have suggested this view is in the main that of the over 65s (think there were some stats to this effect too). I get that social attitudes and the law have changed a lot over their lifetime. But they have seen and experienced all the changes that have happened since which you'd think would make them more tolerant not less. In fact if you can remember homosexuality being illegal surely you'd have MORE sympathy/understanding of why we need to stand up for gay rights.

I don't think weddings are bonkers. I love weddings. Which is why I'm pissed off anyone would think it was the preserve of a specific sexuality or set of people, arrgghhhhhh!

[fluffyraggies]

At face value that is shocking and depressing. Nearly a quarter of those asked :(

But ... hmmm, yes, who did they ask? we must remember those figures were gathered with the intention of making a tv programme on the back of them. You could ask 4 grumpy 80/90 year olds if they would be perfectly happy going to a same sex wedding and if 3 of them said no you'd have a ''75% of people surveyed wouldn't go to a gay wedding'' headline for your show.

[HesterShaw]

It doesn't mean 22% of those invited would refuse the invitation though, does it? Because a gay couple are not likely to be friends with homophobes and therefore wouldn't invite any. So I don't think the bigots need to agonize about refusing an invitation....they won't get any.

[TillyTellTale]

I love ComposHat's point.

I'm not sure how I'll resist pressuring gay friends to get married now.

[nickymanchester]

I would very much agree with what thecatneuterer said above.

A lot of people on MN come from a very liberal, affluent or middle class background. A large part of the UK do not.

If anything, it's gratifying that it is such a small number.

To the poster that complained about the small size of the survey this is actually quite common. The figures they get are then weighted to match the overall UK figures.

So, for example, if they manage to contact a lot more pensioners in the survey than they are as a percentage of the UK population then the answers that those people give are given a lesser weighting so that the survey actually reflects the range of different people in this country.

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

You're easily shocked. I'm only late forties and, even in my lifetime, the types of marriages that have raised eyebrows and objections have included....

• being pregnant when walking down the aisle
• mixed (race) marriages
• divorcees getting married (in a church)

None of which apply today. Gay marriage is a new thing that challenges existing opinions. Give it 20 years and it'll be dead normal.

[Tanith]

Yes, I saw this and thought "Cobblers!!"

I was astounded when I saw that they'd surveyed just over 1000 people. So let's see - 20% of 1000 makes a grand total of: 200

Scarcely 20% of the population!

BBC Radio 5 Live should be utterly ashamed of themselves!

[Tanith]

So - I make it around 45 people replying to the thread, so let's double that and it nearly makes 100...
And so far, no-one's said they wouldn't refuse such an invite, so that's positive. And Mumsnet is pretty representative of the nation - more so than Radio 5 Live, anyway...

So my survey is worth just as much and it shows that almost 100% of the population would be delighted to accept an invitation to a single sex marriage!

So there!