First wedding anniversary.

[Germgirl]

Ok I know I'm BU and probably horribly grabby and mean and spoilt and all those other things.
But.
It's our first wedding anniversary in April. The paper one. I have ordered DH a personalized paper cut thingy with our wedding date & location, our names etc on it. It's £120.
DH has been looking increasingly worried for the past few weeks about what to buy me. By his own admission he's crap with presents. So yesterday he said 'do I really have to buy a present? I can't think of anything, what do you want?'
I don't really want anything, I want him to think about me & get something, I don't care how much it costs.
I said that he could buy me something when we go on holiday in May but then I felt all sad that he can't be bothered to try to think of something.
Am I BU? I know I am. But I just feel a bit sad. Silly I know.

[Germgirl]

I think in future we'll either buy something together for the house or just do cards. I think I'm just being a bit precious because it's the first anniversary.
I never thought I'd get married, and when I did, at 40, it was just brilliant & I never want to forget it.
Anyway, he's much happier now the 'pressure' (that he imagined! ) is off.

[LtEveDallas]

DH and I agreed at the start that we would buy token gifts only on anniversaries, but that we would try to follow the Paper/Leather/China thing.

Our first anniversary he bought me a cookbook (that I happened to point out I would really like "and oh, look, books are made of paper" ) and I got him a sudoku book.

2nd Cotton - He got a welsh dragon towel, I got a pair of daps
3rd Leather - Him wallet, me belt
4th Silk - Him pants, me pants!
5th Wood - Him birdhouse, me wooden ornament (that is bloody lovely and one of the best things I own)
and so on (it's tin this year - I am firmly expecting a tin of Branston Beans because I complain about the nasty tesco beans he buys)

I let him know what the 'theme' is about a month before, and then leave it at that. I think knowing that I don't expect riches (in fact I'd be annoyed if he spent more than 10-20 quid max), makes it easier. He wouldn't bother at all I think.

[firesidechat]

If one person is freaking out this much about an anniversary present then perhaps presents aren't such a great idea. This may however be coloured by the fact that we never do anniversary presents, just a nice meal and maybe a card.

[frazmum]

For our wedding anniversary we either spend the money on doing something together or a joint present. The fun's in choosing together something you both like. And a lot less pressure.

[TheresLotsOfFarmyardAnimals]

Work back if you're following the years thing, diamonds while you're young enough to get a good wear out of them. Paper for when you're old and incontinent!

Yanbu, DH isn't especially thoughtful when it comes to gifts. It truly is the thought that counts isn't it.

[Choccywoccydodah]

We don't do anniversary gifts, we'd rather go out for a nice meal on our own or something. However, I bought dh a quite expensive personalised pen that he could use forever for our 'paper' anniversary. He loves it and uses it for everything.
I didn't get anything, but we agreed not to buy anything so I wasn't miffed at all

[Germgirl]

Why sooty?

[ilovesooty]

This isn't an implied criticism of you but I feel really sorry for him now.

[Germgirl]

Oh dear. More panicking apparently the picture we like isn't a big enough file size to be blown up into a big canvas.
He's just phoned me in a state
So I said we'll buy a Vegas print when we go to Vegas in May & have it shipped home. Relieved husband
Poor man. He really is awful at presents. In a few years time I'm going to be one of those ladies who gets told 'get yourself something nice & I'll give you the money' like in a 1970s sitcom.
But in every other way he's wonderful. So it doesn't matter

[Germgirl]

I think he will like the paper thing, I've made similar things (nowhere near as complicated) & he likes those.
He woke up at 5am and the first thing he said was 'what shall I do about your present?' I felt terrible!
We talked again about the Vegas print but he said he couldn't find a really nice one. So we looked through our honeymoon photos & found a lovely one there that he's going to try to have made into a print.
I feel awful for making him feel bad & I had said not to buy anything but hopefully now there's a solution & we'll get a nice picture for the wall & also know that we took the photo ourselves.

[edwinbear]

The fact he is so worried about it speaks volumes. Anniversary presents, when you are limited to a specific medium are hard, they put you on the spot. dh and I celebrate 10 yrs this year. Some years, I have had a brain wave, ie 1st year I bought him an F1 race ticket signed by Ayrton Senna as he is a big F1 fan, he bought me a book on origami . Then there was the year I got stuck with wood so bought him a box and put an Ipod in it = cheating - he bought me a beautiful trunk. On the years I do the better job, I just feel a bit smug!

[gamerchick]

Yanno no..just no. I'm In no way precious about presents for Christmas and birthdays, but my wedding anniversary I like the traditions.

There's no excuse.. We all have Google and if it's important to you then he can do some tapping for ideas.

It's not hard!

[KonkeyDong]

YABVU

I honestly don't get anniversaries though, and DH has to prompt me to get a card

[BeaLola]

OP I totally get it. But you need to get that your partner doesnt. My DH is the same ... He is an only child and he was brought up not celebrating birthdays that much and certainly not anniversaries or Mothers/Fathers Day. I have got used to it. I never ever get an anniversary gift. That said I get tea in bed at weekends on a very regular basis and breakfast too. He is also great at buying flowers when he does supermarket run and overall prettygood at buying me birthday and christmas gifts. For our first anniversary he looked horrified that we would buy presents for each other ... We go out for a meal always. Therefore on our first anniversary I bought a present to clelebrate .... a lovely mirror for our downstairs loo. In subsequent years I have bought either something for the house or the garden and I no longer get miffed by it.

[Musicaltheatremum]

What about an eternity ring. ??

[AmandaTanen]

That's a lovely gift but my DH wouldn't appreciate it at all, it's probably something that I would buy for a keepsake but not a gift IYKWIM. We did a card and dinner on our first anniversary.

[Sicaq]

You're not being grabby; there are a few martyrs on MN who like to say that anyone expecting a little, y"know, kind gesture from their partner is being "grabby".

It would not kill him to think of his own kind gesture.

[Germgirl]

Fut. it's this. Papercut thingy

[FutTheShuckUp]

How do you buy someone a paper cut? Dont you just get them from doing shredding/filing

[ButternutSquish]

It's our 1st wedding anniversary on Monday and I didn't think we were doing presents. My parents never did so never though of it. He just happened to say he'd ordered my present online so now I'm panicing!

I'm looking at getting tickets to a gig although he has very different musical tastes to me. Kylie goes on sale on Friday and if we don't get tickets I do have a back up in Lady Gaga or Katy Perry.....

[Germgirl]

ArsePaste. Those are lovely presents. Like I said, I suggested the Vegas print because we got married there but he didn't seem keen.
He does know I spent that much. Now he thinks he has to spend the same. But it's absolutely not about the money.
I make cards so I'll make his & he said he'll make me one.
I'm being grabby. I must stop.

[ArsePaste]

The OP does say paper.

I got my husband a print out of one of the lyrics of the songs we played during the ceremony as his first anniversary present, even with a graphic designer involved it cost less than 50. He got me a watercolour of the wedding venue. Very sweet, and again, very cheap.

[Fresh01]

We are the same as cbeebies. We get each other a card and then buy something joint for the house. A picture one year, another was patio table, another a new BBQ.

My DH has his birthday, father day and our wedding anniversary in the one month. I am usually not to bad for present ideas but I struggle with 3 in a month. It is hard especially when kids are young and you have to think of things from them too.

[ViviPru]

Are you in the US? Isn't it paper in the UK? (It's my 1st year anniversary in May, now I'm confused)

[Pobblewhohasnotoes]

I think we got each other cards and went for a meal when he had a baby sitter.

I agree a bit of thought is nice. You spent £120?? Does he know you've spent that much and is worried about what on earth to buy you?