to not have realised that so much of childhood would be taken up by illness?

[toomuchillness]

Before I had DC, I knew that obviously DC would be ill at times but I genuinely didn't realise how much of their time they would spend in illness. I have one at school and one at nursery. Their noses seem to run for 6-7 months at a time virtually constantly from September to when the weather starts to get warmer. Colds, chest infections, conjunctivitis, diarrhoea, vomiting, molluscum contagiousm, chicken pox, coughs which last for a month a time - it just doesn't seem to end

Everyone says it will get better when they get older. The annoying thing is I end up catching quite a few of the illnesses too

[myitchybeaver]

I think it's bad luck, for whatever reason.

3DC and I've barely touches wood had a day off work (bar 4 days with chicken pox) with my kids.

Constitution? Maybe. It's not diet - DD2 is a food refuser and lives on chicken nuggets!

[Creamycoolerwithcream]

When my 3 DS were pre school they all got really ill about twice a year each where they couldn't eat, slept all the time, DS3 also had croup a few times. We then had quite a few good years where they missed maybe one day of school every two years. Then 2 years ago DS3 who is a teen was diagnosed with epilepsy after quite a few trips to the hospital and it's tough for him. I think it's easy to take good health for granted.

[dietcokeandwine]

Some kids are just far more susceptible to things than others OP. There's only so much you can do with diet and vitamins! Genetics will play a part too and some of the illness stuff is just pure bad luck. My kids eat a good but not organically perfect diet; I have a friend who is far, far stricter about refined sugar than I am, yet her children are almost constantly ill and mine rarely are.

Different things for different kids...my DS1 is nearly 10, has a fabulous immune system and every rarely needs a day off through illness. However, he's also notched up five separate visits to A&E for various accidents, two of which required serious medical intervention/surgery etc. So he might have a great constitution but he's bloody accident prone. Win some, lose some I guess!

Hope your children's health improves soon.

[dietcokeandwine]

rarely ever

[FuzzyWuzzywasaWoman]

I could have written your op myself, you are not alone. I have 3 pre schoolers and they always seemed to have some ailment. I dread winter as I seemed to spend the whole time cleaning vomit from bed sheets, giving Calpol or wiping snot. I am currently on carers leave from work to look after my poor chicken poxy DS.

Before I had DC I hadn't been off sick for about 6 years, I now seem to catch every bug they do requiring time off work (I work with immunosuppressed patients so can't take any chances). I don't know if it's bad luck or genetics, no idea. But like you op I can't do anymore to boost their immune systems/improve diet etc I can only live in hope they improve by the time they get to school.

[sisterofmercy]

I was never ill as a kid (made up for it as an adult - bah!) and my brother was always ill (he is now as strong as an ox). We had the same house same diet etc. Some people are just more prone to catching every bug that goes round.

I suppose the bright side is that your children will hopefully also be as strong as oxen when they grow up too.

[WilsonFrickett]

I do think some DCs are very 'vomity' for want of a better word, and of course that means you have to keep them off school/nursery in case it's something major, when often it's just an upset tummy. If they had the same level of runny nose, you wouldn't dream of keeping them off, iyswim.

DH is very 'stomachy' whereas when I get ill it's usually my throat - much easier to just keep going with some strepsils and paracetamol.

[ItsSpringBaby]

I wasn't that ill as a child, in fact there was a point in my early 20's, that I couldn't even remember what it was like to vomit. And the last major illness I'd had was flu at 18.

Now both DS1 and DS2 are in primary school though my days of boasting are over. It is hell! - every year they pick up something, and if it's not one it's the other, which of course will then spread around the immediate family like wildfire. Due to being pregnant I've been ill virtually non-stop since they returned to school in Jan. I might have send them out in germ masks in the near future!

[BraveLilBear]

Today is my third day off work since returning last Monday. DS was ill once before starting nursery despite running the gauntlet at a children's centre playgroup.

He's been ill now for 4 weeks with various combinations of sore throat/fever/cold/cough.

Makes me feel doubly guilty - bad enough he has to be in nursery ft at 7 months, worse that it's making him so ill.

[Dahlen]

OP I completely understand and want to offer sympathy.

Mine are older now and it has got better, allowing me to push forward with my career, whereas for the first few years I remained in a non-demanding role where time off wasn't a problem because I needed so much of it.

I am rarely ill. My Bradford Factor is excellent. It is an approach I am trying to model for my DC. Unless they are swaying on their feet, the attitude in my house is just get on with it, and if you can't, try to get on with it anyway but with some calpol thrown in. Nothing bar sickness and diarrhoea or a high temperature (and we've carried on with moderate ones) is enough to stop us.

Unfortunately, schools, nurseries and CMs do not take the same approach. OFSTED policy recommends that children are refused from settings if they have a heavy cold - not flu, a cold.

Unless you have particularly resilient children, an understanding relative/friend to pick up the slack, few people reliant on professional childcare (where your child is exposed to more germs than those cared for by a nanny or relative/friend) manage their child's early years without a lot of stress, juggling and time off.

It does get better though. Hang on in there.

[toomuchillness]

Just wanted to say thank you to all the supportive posters

[Martorana]

I don't think I was unsupportive. I think it's very important to question what we consider "illness".

OP- you list molluscum as an illness, for example. It's a horrible, unsightly condition. But it's not an illness- and shouldn't stop a child doing anything they want to do.

[miaowmix]

Agree with Martorana actually, I don't consider most mild things like runny noses to be 'illness', and generally not worth being off school for.
Whoever said a London thing? That is truly baffling.
London zone 2 here and I think DD has had maybe 2 days off sick in 3 years of school.
I am one of those smug twats who never gets ill either (touch wood obviously).
London doesn't tend to make people ill per se .

[sweepdoesntlikecrowds]

I sympathize OP and am having the same experience, I have one ds at pre school and ds2 1.8, they have had ear infections, chest infections, coughs, croup, colds regularly this winter. Ds2 vomits and gets temperatures every time, ds1 is now stronger and shakes things off quicker.

We eat fairly well, despite some fussiness, get exercise, fresh air, air the house, keep heating at minimum needed to keep warm but not stuffy, etc.

I think it's one of those things, friends with young children have mainly same experience.

Today I've found chocolate helps as I can barely keep my eyes open with the sleepless nights we've had recently thanks to teething and colds.

I need summer.

[VoyageDeVerity]

My sister is so god damn smug about what she did to prevent him from being ill as a child. You would think she was a mum or a saint the way she goes on when DD is always ill - are you doing this are you doing that yes yes yes!! I remember her son was weaned on pork balls and sausages.

The fact is he was simply made of very healthy stock with his paternal side never ever ill and like oxes.

DD is like DH. Very pretty! But delicate as a petal and just prone to bloody everything. Nothing we did made any difference what so ever!

[VoyageDeVerity]

A nun

[Martorana]

I'm not suggesting you can do anything to change your child's health. I am suggesting that some people might benefit from changing their view of illness.

[cory]

Considering the attitudes of schools these days (letters threatening prosecution if your child clocks up more than 5 days off) I doubt there are that many parents who keep their children off for a runny nose. Probably far more who send them in with a slightly dodgy tummy or a badly infected throat- because they aren't the ones who have to worry about the immuno-compromised child in the same class.

I remember how I used to quail at the cheery "oh he was sick in the night but he's absolutely fine now and I don't believe in keeping them off unnecessarily". Because I knew my child would be the one who would get whatever it was really badly and be off school for days, resulting in more nasty interviews with the HT, and possibly trips to A&E.

[Sirzy]

Every child is different some are more susceptible to illness that others, some fight off illness better and some don't act ill when they are ill.

DS is regulary ill with chest problems (as in missed 20 odd days of pre school since starting in September) but never seems to have any problems with anything else (touch wood) and when he is ill he rarely acts ill - he just doesn't seem phased by it!

[shrunkenhead]

A lot of it is pandering, you have to be honest.

[Losthearts]

A lot of it is pandering, you have to be honest

This makes me think of a good username I saw on here - FuttheShukup

[shrunkenhead]

I agree lot of it is luck, my child is 5 and hasn't missed a day of nursery/preschool/reception. I raised my DD like many of my friends bf/weaned on fruit and veg/vegetarian diet etc and many of theirs are constantly off with ear infections etc

[innisglas]

My daughter's immune system was severely sabotaged by the blythe way doctors used to prescribe antibiotics until the winter when she was seven and she caught everything going around the school and the doctor just kept on prescribing her antibiotics and never questioned her poor immune response. I took her to a friend who was a qualified Chinese herbalist and he gave her herbs to take for three days and she didn't get sick again for two years. Since then I am very cautious about using antibiotics, wonderful lifesaving medicine though they are.

[Martorana]

So- define illness.

As I said, a child needs to tell me/show me they are ill- I don't tell them. If they don't, we carry on as normal.

[VoyageDeVerity]

So if they have a fever of 40 but can't articulate they feel ill you keep on going with the day?