My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

to not want to be approached by charity collectors?

135 replies

KidsDontThinkImCool · 16/03/2014 20:32

Raising money and awareness for charities is a wonderful thing. Of course it is. I've done it myself from time to time and I give what support I can. It's important and it's bloody hard work and I have nothing but admiration for those who give their time and energy to do it.

But...I'm really beginning to hate being asked, every time I go to the supermarket or the shopping centre, if I want to help prevent children's cancer. Well who doesn't? but I feel so small and so mean if I don't have spare change to put in their buckets every day! Is it so wrong not to want charity collectors to act like salesmen, making unsolicited pitches designed to make people feel guilty? Is it just me? AIBU or does anyone else feel this way?

OP posts:
Report
WooWooOwl · 17/03/2014 11:01

The worst are the chiggers that try to get to your bank details by talking to your children. That is really low in my opinion.

Last week an Oxfam Chugger did this to my 11 year old ds via the football shirt he was wearing, and he did deserve to be told to fuck off. I didn't say that, but I will stop donating to the Oxfam shop I usually give to as a result.

Report
HowManyUsernamesAreThere · 17/03/2014 11:01

Y'know, people with collection tins I don't mind. I'll happily give them some spare change. Big Issue sellers - it's a pity I don't read the Big Issue, and I don't think I'm allowed to give you spare change (you never ask for it anyway). Random people begging - yeah, from time to time you'll get some out of me.

People giving you a sales pitch in the street and trying to get you to sign up for direct debits can sod off. And if you come to my home you're going to get me basically saying "no thanks" and then the door closed.

My bank account is precious. I know a lot of fraud goes on, that's why I'll covet my bank details like some sort of holy script. I've given change to fake charities before - some people set up some tables in the city centre after a tsunami a while back and got hundreds, then legged it.

As such, I'll quite happily give you some change. Direct debit - not a chance. And if you're going to shout "you don't have time to save the world?" after me (like one did recently) then you're going to get even less respect. You don't know whether I've got somewhere really urgent to go (in that case I did) and you're just making yourself look like a tit.

I now avoid these people in the street wherever I can.

Report
BigRedBall · 17/03/2014 11:09

I hated it when TK MAXX started asking if I wanted to donate a pound for Cancer Research at the tills. That was so invasive and rude. I remember saying "no thanks" once and the cashier made a face at me and I could feel people in the queue behind me giving me daggers.

We already donate a substantial amount every year anyway so hate being approached by charity people on streets and stuff.

Report
livingzuid · 17/03/2014 11:22

bigredball Ronald MacDonald House did that here where I am. Every time over Christmas and New Year when you went into buy something at McDs they asked you if you could contribute 30 cents or round up your order to go to their charity. They looked quite horrified when I said 'no'. It's bloody rude and invasive (speaking with a personal hat on).

Report
LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 17/03/2014 11:22

anonbecausechugLOL... So, all people have to do is say politely, "No, thanks", is it? Is that right? If they do that you will let them past, you won't bar their way, try to stop them, cajole them, persuade them, embarrass them or do whatever you feel is your right to do to essentially force them to sign?

I had no idea it was that simple... ShockHmm

Yes, please do find another job. Your description of the 'work' and your interaction with the public you do on a daily basis bears no relation to your determination to annoy by speaking in foreign tongues when it should be obvious to you that people don't want to engage with you - and you approached them not the other way around. I'm sorry that you've been harassed but non-consensual works BOTH ways...

Report
NinjaBunny · 17/03/2014 11:25

I remember saying "no thanks" once and the cashier made a face at me and I could feel people in the queue behind me giving me daggers.

I'd have asked for my card back and left.

Report
NotSoChicAfterAll · 17/03/2014 11:34

The worst ones are the door to door ones.
I live in a flat, and one buzzed on and came up, I thought it was a delivery. I opened the door with 5mo DD in arms, a young lad then went on to tell me about the charity, that he had spoke to all my neighbours and they were all going to donate, (which was a blatant lie as all my neighbours that day were at a funeral of a resident) and if id like to sign up to a direct debit.
I said if he had a leaflet or a website I will look it up online and if I would donate I will do it then, I didn't have time to do it then.

He was persistent & said he had no leaflet & wasn't a website and didn't I want to help the cancer charity.
I told him I knew he got paid a lot to push sales, and that if I wanted to donate to a charity I will do on my own will, that I had my hands full and told him to leave.
He then told me the website quickly before he left, and went to buzz on all my other neighbours even though I told him they were out.

Report
ComposHat · 17/03/2014 11:34

I have no problems responding to chuggers who ask questions like 'do ypu want to help solve child poverty' or 'do you want to help cure cancer' with a No.

I mean obviously I do. But saying no to their heavily loaded question completely wrong foots them.

Any charity that chugs people is considerably less likely to get a donation from me.

Report
uselessidiot · 17/03/2014 11:37

YANBU, I especially hate the way the way they manage to make every death and moment of suffering your personal fault. It really gets me down. Even if I wanted to I couldn't look after everyone in the world. I really really hate that any suffering is my fault. However if I gave "just" 5 per month to every charity I'm asked to give monthly to not just me but my children would be homeless and starving in less than a year. It's like by continuing to exist I'll cause suffering no matter what I do.

I've been homeless before. I was approached by a Shelter chugged when I was leaving the council's homeless services offices in tears. He made a bad day 100 times worse by suggesting I was being selfish, following me down the street as I sobbed. Even screaming at him "I'm homeless and no one will help me you bastard, where do you think I'd get money for a donation? Didn't stop him. To this day I wish I'd smacked the smug git in the face.

Report
icanmakeyouicecream · 17/03/2014 11:39

It's begging and it's disgusting. I love charity shops, so that's how I do my bit.

Report
Mrsdavidcaruso · 17/03/2014 11:40

I have seen 'local' Big issue sellers coming across to the Island on the ferry cant be that homeless and poor if they can afford to travel across the most expensive stretch of water in the world on a regular basis.

I did have a row with an RSPCA chugger who homed in on me becuase I had my puppy with me got the speil about animals etc said no sorry I dont donate via my bank.

he started to have a go at me trying to make me feel guilty because my puppy had a home and was well cared for and didnt I want to help other animals who are not that lucky, I took enourmous pleasure in informing him that I work as an unpaid volunteer 3 afternoons a week at the RSPCA Charity shops and due to my work there and the donations I personally bring in I have helped raise 100s of pounds for the RSPCA and the Local Godshill centre - that shut him up - did mention his aggressive tactics to the managing commitee as I felt he could alienate people who may have wanted to donate

Report
TheSmallClanger · 17/03/2014 11:53

I ignore chuggers, like I ignore anyone else I don't know shouting at me in the street.

Report
yegodsandlittlefishes · 17/03/2014 12:10

When we go shopping, we have to go from place to place, try on clothes, compare, check prices, go backwards and forwards and to and fro. There are always at least 5 or 6 chuggers we have to pass each time while doing this. If I shop with my DD for clothes it is particularly difficult already on a number of levels (she has an eating disorder. Actually, the reason we are out shopping for clothes for her at all has been because she's lost so much weight. Trying on clothes is very distressing for her in itself. Also for me, as I just want her well again. Then there's buying more clothes because she's put some weight back on, and we have to get rid of the smaller ones. So there's the unmentionable expense of it all, and so no I do not have any spare money to help other people's sick children, but I am not at liberty to talk about DD's mental health on the street.) I am just trying to support my town centre shops which are dying a death, but it makes it very difficult when we get stopped or shouted at between every shop, and again every time we walk to and fro.

Why should I have to say 'no thanks'? There is no default that we are all supposedly wanting to buy something from every shop unless we say no, so why the hell should I say no thanks to chuggers, or be made to feel guilty? I am never going to say thank you to a chugger again, as I really think there should be a law against it and I don't want them clogging up the town centre.

Report
PixieBumbles · 17/03/2014 12:33

I went right off chuggers after I got stopped by a chugger doing the whole blocking the street, arms flung out wide, "hey there ginger" Hmm thing. I was in a hurry to get to an appointment and genuinely could not stop so I side stepped around him, smiled and said "no thank you, I'm not interested".

The response I got from this charming, educated young man who just wants to earn a living to survive on while trying to do something good for the world?

"Fine. Fuck off then. Bitch".

The charity he was chugging for got an irate e-mail asking whether that was really the type of person they wanted representing them. To be fair, the charity and the chugging agency both dealt with my complaint really well.

Report
Chelvis · 17/03/2014 12:55

To those saying 'just say no thank you' - I do say 'no thanks' and half the time, that's ignored and they continue to shout at me, try to step in my way, grab my arm. What should I do then in order to be left in peace as I try to get on with my business?

I am sick of having my appearance commented upon by chuggers. I've had chuggers comment on my pregnancy, my hair, my skin colour, my clothes, my shoes, my leg size and my make up. I've also had chuggers ask me personal questions about an injury / scar and once, one actually grabbed hold of my bandaged arm and asked how I hurt it. Actually grabbed the bandage and the injury underneath, causing me pain.

So yes, now I ignore because being polite and saying 'no thank you' seems to be seen as an acknowledgement and a start of a conversation by many of them. I treat chuggers as I treat anyone who is shouting at me in the street - I ignore.

Report
Stockhausen · 17/03/2014 13:05

YANBU. I recently stopped to chat to a girl collecting donations by text for cancer research, it was a one off, no direct debits etc, so I said ok.

She said to expect a follow up call, just for feedback on how she had been with me, it would be quick, and no obligation.

Only it wasn't. The call was to guilt trip me into a direct debit, lasted about ten minutes until I finally hung up on her. I was very angry, and went from feeling I'd done something good, to feeling crap.

I volunteer locally, I try to do my bit. But these chuggers absolutely get on my wick Angry

Report
MrsDeVere · 17/03/2014 13:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AvonCallingBarksdale · 17/03/2014 13:13

Absolutely cannot stand chuggers. Their faux enthusiasm, as if they're auditioning for a CBBC show, and their ridiculous, manipulative questioning. I have taken to answering "no", firmly when they ask if I'd like to help find a cure for cancer/save children/find a cure for dementia, which usually stops them in their tracks. FWIW, I already give to various charities of my choice, but I will not be stopped in the street and be arm-twisted into signing up. Don't get me started on the doorsteppers, either.

Report
NinjaBunny · 17/03/2014 13:14

There was one bloke who stood outside the supermarket shouting 'kids with CANCER, kiddies with CANCEEEEEEERRRRRR!'

I'm still amazed that there aren't more assaults on chuggers.

Obviously I don't want them to be assaulted, but I'm surprised more people don't lash out. Especially if they're grabbing wounded body parts, telling you to fuck off or jumping in front of you and not letting you past.

Confused

Report
MiaowTheCat · 17/03/2014 13:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LessMissAbs · 17/03/2014 13:23

anonbecausechugLOL you have actually confirmed my views on some chuggers. This sort of baseless narcissm that they somehow know better than the punter on the street, speak more languages than that punter, are somehow more worldly and just more damned clever than they will ever be.

Its not true. If theres one thing I can't stand more than being spoken to like a dumb housewife who doesn't know her own name because I'm using a supermarket, its having some weird bloke thinking I'll be flattered because he is talking to me and trying to get me to part with my cash. Do they actually teach you that sort of stuff as a sales technique?

By the way, some of us speak "foreign languages" because they are not foreign to us, and the first words that come to mind are in that language when some stranger starts speaking and you are busy.

From a legal viewpoint, some of what chuggers do is verging on undue influence. Chugging depends a lot on the more vulnerable personality type, which is often a very lonely and/or elderly or infirm person, signing up. Which is my main point of objection to it, beyond the fact that personally I find it bloody irritating and am perfectly capable of deciding which charities I support in my own time.

Report
Rupertandfifi · 17/03/2014 13:31

I'm with avon, I always reply "no thanks" to whatever their question.
I once got caught out in whsmith. I was thinking about getting one of their reading devices. As I entered the shop there was an assistant at the kobo desk. Brilliant I thought, someone who can help me immediately. So I walked up to him with a big smile and my purse as I had a list of questions about the kobo in it.
It turns out he was a chugger. A number of people also asked him for help but he converted the into potential targets. Dreadful.
I avoid that shop now.

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

MackerelOfFact · 17/03/2014 14:12

I just say 'sorry, I'm in a hurry'. I don't have time to stop for every chugger and make polite conversation to make their working day better.

On one stretch of road in central London there might be 4 chuggers. Round the corner on the next road there might be another 3 working for another charity. A bit further along there might be two more. Every single day there are people in the same spots canvassing for different organisations. So in my lunch break, I might come across 18 chuggers. Every. Single. Day.

I donate to cost-effective charities with low overheads - mostly those dealing with communicable and parasitic diseases in developing countries.

Report
uselessidiot · 17/03/2014 14:29

That doesn't work though mackerel. They follow you telling you what a nasty person you are, accusing you of all sorts of crimes. I've only been rude to a chugger that once. He really pushed me when I was emotionally very vulnerable and wouldn't leave me alone.

Report
Nokidsnoproblem · 17/03/2014 14:43

When I was unemployed I ended up doing a few days work as a chugger...

It all started when I saw an exciting advert in my local newspaper. The advert was something along the lines of, 'Intelligent, business-minded leaders wanted for an expanding company in the city centre. Earning potential of up to $4000 per month!'. Being in need of a job I phoned them and immediately got offered an interview. I did ask them to elaborate on what the job entailed, but they stayed vague.

A few days later I went to the office, which to be fair was in the city centre. They had me come at around 10am, which was exactly the time that the chuggers got their pep talk from the manager. I was in a different room so I couldn't hear exactly what was going on, but I heard lots of cheers and enthusiasm, which excited me. After this the chuggers left and I was called in for the interview. The boss was suited and booted in a decked out office giving it all, "I only started working here a year ago, and look at me now!" His questions were like "Do you like money?", "Do you like meeting people?" "Would you like to run your own business?" Obviously I answered yes to everything and he gave me the job. I still didn't know what the job was though... After I accepted the job he told me what it was, and my heart dropped, but I kept smiling because the rich man was smiling...

As I left I though, well it can't be that bad. I was a student at the time and had three months off for the summer. What's the worst that could happen?

So 3 days later I turned up for my first day at work. I arrived at 8am. The rich boss was not there... I was told by a lady that the job was commission only and I would have to work six-days a week. I was told that I was technically self-employed, but had to be there at 8am Monday-Saturday. They made me get 20 passport photos done (at my own expense) which was quite a dent on my pocket money. At around 9am lots of the chuggers came in, they all told me how much they loved the job, how much money they were making, how much spare time they had, all this crap really, but I didn't realise that at the time.

They told me that I would be going door-to-door and selling for a particular charity. The area that they sent me to (in Middlesborough) was a complete ghost town. It was a Monday morning, so most people were at work, the people not working were retired (you couldn't sign up anyone over the age of 65). It was very crushing.

I lasted two days on the field before I packed it in. I told them at the end of the second day that I couldn't do it anymore. They discreetly took me to one side and asked me to leave very quietly and not tell anyone that I was leaving because they didn't want to 'damage moral'.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.