DS has HFA and SPD and is just 3.
He was tired and didn't want to go to fine motor skills play therapy session with occupational therapist but I took him as
- Too late to cancel and we'd paid (£50)
- He often cheers up and gets into it after grizzling at first.
Today there was another mother with a child and another child (minus parent). It was her child's first session.
The session is open to DC who need occupational therapy for fine motor problems and many of these DC have SN.
My DS was not having a full blown autistic meltdown, just crying and saying he wanted to leave and play outside.
I adopted my usual strategy which is not to performance parent for onlookers benefit by cajoling or scolding or reasoning but to sit in corner and hold him whilst looking slightly bored, paying no attention to fussing and redirecting his attention to what's going on in room. And saying, yes, we will play outside later but first we are here to have play session with [name of OT and other dc]
The OT suggested I put DS in play tent to calm down or take him into a side room. From experience this would just prolong the fussing. And he would get louder and they would still hear it all and we risked tipping into a full blown meltdown.
The other mother started rolling her eyes and saying her DC was disturbed and it was his first session and a pity. Her DC was watching but did not seem upset, only curious and continued to play.
I pointed out to OT that DS was calming down, we'd been there under 10 min and children crying and fussing was something to be expected in preschool/ play groups and most DC would have experienced it.
As DS doesn't have a mute button and I wasn't able to get him to stop fussing immediately and I couldn't handle the glares, wibu to give up and take him out?
I am annoyed about it because I think
- I was handling it
- It's not unrealistic to expect a weepy kid at a 2-3 year old activity session
- Particularly when DC with autism/other SN are among the participants.
And we had paid and were doing our best.
Maybe her child never fusses, maybe he was very disturbed but I couldn't see it, maybe I'm being hypersensitive that my boy is not NT but I went home feeling angry and shit.
What would you have done?