AIBU to be a bit surprised that grown ups really care about Valentine's Day?

[TheresLotsOfFarmyardAnimals]

Just look at all the threads! If it is really important to you that your DH is romantic and vice versa, shouldn't it be all year round?

We aren't what I'd call romantic but a couple of times a year I get flowers from DH or I take him out for dinner etc. I just don't understand why it has to be on a set day?

It was important to me when I was 16 and undoubtedly NOT getting a valentines card from anyone though. I'm not entirely sure when it changed but I'd reckon by 18 I was over it.

[Callani]

Any excuse to support the local economy via the restaurant business is ok by me!

Come on everyone, be selfless for this one night and think of your local SMEs struggling by in the recession, and how you could ease their burden by stuffing your faces with steak / chicken / whatever takes your fancy.

Makes me feel so very noble and self sacrificing

[cory]

All cultures have regularly occurring festivals, it seems to meet some kind of human need. Gift-giving is an extremely common type of annual festivity globally, so again one would assume that this is something many people in different cultures tend to want to do.

In the west, the tradition of giving presents at Valentine's day seems at least as old as that of giving presents at Christmas (used to be New Year in The Middle Ages).

Personally I am glad we have advanced as far as chocolates and wine as I don't really trust dh's taste in socks (Pepys' choice of Valentine presents) and feel assured that any poem composed by him (a la medieval lovers) would be unlikely to add much to the occasion. A note addressing me as his own true valentine (one of the Pastons) might be nice- but I still prefer Thornton's.

[foslady]

It's that I've never had anyone who ever even wanted to say 'Happy Valentines day' to me when I was with someone - flowers and card I wasn't ever fussed about......and don't have anyone at all now, so a day of 'aren't we wonderful because you want to be with me' - translates to you're shit because no one wants to be with you.

And I have enough other reasons to feel shit about myself without M&S and hallmark ramping it up. So fine, celebrate, do what ever you want, but pass the sick bag at some of the status updates.......

(I know - I'm totally unreasonable - but for once really don't give a shit)

[VegetariansTasteLikeChicken]

Yabu if you birthdays, Christmas and other holiday. They're all a loaad of crap. But fun crap

[GreenPetal94]

I went to see my pal today whos relationship is not going so well and he had forgotten to get her a card. And at that point just a card would have made a difference.

DH and I tend to do card or maybe flowers, but nothing at all expensive. I prefer not to spend money on pointless presents whatever the season.

[LittleCutiePie]

It's not that I care so much about valentines day itself really. In fact I warned DH not to get me expensive flowers as we're on a budget these days.

I just used it as an excuse to 'lovebomb' my family today and I'm so glad I did.

I made a few cute cards last night, wrapped up tiny pressies I had bought and set the table all lovely last night. Family were so surprised this morning and we all had a dance around the kitchen before breakfast!

Life is what you make of it and it's so short. My instinct is to grab opportunities to celebrate life and love every chance we can get. Today it was valentines day we celebrated. Tomorrow I'll find something else to celebrate!

[DoJo]

I quite like it - we're not doing anything special as my husband is working tonight, but it's nice to take the time to write my feelings in a card every so often and think about how much better my life is with him in it.

I also like the idea that our children will one day find the collection of cards we have sent to each other over the years and be reminded of us.

I understand people that choose not to celebrate, don't want to set aside a day for being romantic when they feel the whole year should be dedicated to it, or any other reasons for not breaking out the hearts and flowers.

What I can't understand is the attitude that if something isn't enjoyable to you that others should all feel the same, share your opinions or act in a way other than that which comes naturally to them. As with everything, it's just a matter of personal preference, and as long as nobody tries to impose theirs on you, there's no need to concern yourself with what anyone else is doing.

[MrsCakesPremonition]

I wasn't an adult when a nice young man asked me out at the Valentine's Day disco. I was 17yo and still at school.
28 Valentine's days and we are still together, married, 2 DCs.
So Valentine's Day is, and always will be, a bit special for us. Although our wedding anniversary now takes precedence.

[OuterFromOutersville]

Pie, that's lovely .

Okay, I was one of the early Valentine's day Bah Humbugs on the thread, but...I do agree that a reminder such as VD can be a useful prompt in a busy / stressful life. DH and I don't tend to make a big fuss of our anniversary and VD, but I think we might make more of an effort in future. Anyway, I need more chocolates in my life .

But I'm still not having calender specified sex .

[VegetariansTasteLikeChicken]

:) mrscakes

[MrsCakesPremonition]

Outer - just so long as we ll know which night you definitely won't be having sex .

[squoosh]

YABU

In my experience the kind of people who say 'why can't you be romantic all year round' are the kind of people who are never romantic.

Fair enough if you don't want to buy into the whole commercial aspect of the day, you don't actually need to spend a shilling, but where is the harm in couples taking the time to stop and concentrate on being a couple, aside from kids, bills and the day to day humdrum.

[Bedtime1]

Op it's just a bit of fun. I like these mini celebrations and throughout the year.

[FlockOfTwats]

YANBU.

I feel the same about Christmas too with all that season of goodwill, "tis the season" NO fuck off. Don't pretend not to be a nasty miserable shit just because its December. You cant be nice for a month and think it makes up for the rest of the year. If you're gonna be nice be nice all the time.

As for birthdays... Im pretending today isn't happening. I have had two cards. I am not displaying them. Theyre a countdown to your own death.

God im a miserable cow aren't i?

[squoosh]

Yes.

[Bedtime1]

Yes you are!

[Timetoask]

I never give in to marketing! I think exactly the same as you OP, however, when my DH of 12 years brought me yesterday an amazing bunch of red flowers and a beautiful card I must admit my heart fluttered a little!

[Dolcelatte]

Pie has it spot on! Life and love are for celebrating, as life is fragile and short.

What a lot of miserly miseries there are on this thread. OP is obviously still mentally scarred by the lack of interest at age 16, compounded by the fact that her DH isn't that interested either.

Smile, it will soon be Easter! Oh, and there are the Shrove Tuesday pancakes to look forward to first!

[TamerB]

You can do both- Valentine's and other days- you know!
There are such a lot if miseries on here- I prefer not to grow up!

[TamerB]

Pie and MrsCakes seem lovely happy people. I bet they have impromptu days too!

[TamerB]

The miseries are probably the same ones who think that grown ups shouldn't bother with birthdays and that Christmas is just for children!

[WaitingForMe]

We celebrate everything and while we like to think ourselves romantic people, it all comes around so fast!

We don't go overly commercial. I drew a card in watercolour pencil and gave baby DS a sponge and a paintbrush so he could paint it with water. That and the photos I took of him doing it were my gifts to DH.

I should do that stuff all the time but it's hard to fit in. Valentines Day is a reminder that I need to make time. Similarly, I'll do a big Easter Egg hunt for the kids when we go away in April. Not because I'm bothered about Easter but because they deserve the excitement of a scavenger/adventure hunt but I'm usually too caught up in laundry, pasta bakes and buying socks.

[wornoutbutstillwonderful]

My dh and I have been together 20 years as of this years valentines day. We will always keep valentines as a special day, thats the day we first kissed, I was 16 he was 19, we have 3 lovely dc the youngest who was born on valentines day 8 weeks prem so yes yes yes valentines is very special to us.

However if the date had been any other than that would have been a date I wouldn't have forgotten and maybe valentines wouldn't mean so much.

[GoshAnneGorilla]

YABU, I'm in the "life is short so let's celebrate" camp.

I do find the persistent begrudging attitude towards any sort of celebration on MN to be rather peculiar.

I got some flowers, we had a takeaway and very nice it was too.

[feelingvunerable]

I went out for a meal with my new chap and we sent cards.

Last weekend was spent in a rural hotel together.

Next weekend we are staying in a b&b in the village he grew up in.

Life is short and intend to enjoy it.