To Find this Woman in the Cinema Rude

[LessMissAbs]

Me and my friend were watching a film in the cinema tonight. She doesn't wear a watch and must have been checking her phone for the time - its a habit of hers to do this, or to ask people the time. I was sitting next to her and I didn't notice it.

There was an empty seat to her other side between her and a woman. The woman suddenly boomed out in the middle of the film, "If you want to play your phone, you can go outside and do it instead of in here".

It was mortifying, and she interrupted the film for me. I was really embarrassed for my friend, but we didn't say anything.

At the end of the film, as we were standing up to leave, I said to the woman "I don't really care if you were disturbed by a light during the film or not, I don't want to have to the film interrupted by your booming voice". She then started arguing back (she said something like "Oh you'd like to be a cheeky one, wouldn't you, and some other stuff) but we turned our backs towards her and her husband so that she was talking to ourselves, put on our coats and left.

Kind of ruined the film for both of us. Normally I find going to the cinema relaxing!

[slightlysnippy]

I was on your side for most of this OP, as I do check my phone during the cinema at least once to see if the babysitters called, but always wait for a noisy action packed moment to make sure I don't disturb people. From your last post, you state quite an intense film, you checked your watch a couple of times using your light and your friend was also checking her phone, yep I think YABU.

[HarpyFishwifeTwat]

It's selfish people like you and your friend who make going to the cinema an unpleasant experience. If your friend can't cope for a couple of hours without looking at her phone she should think about getting some help.

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

If you are both sat there farting around with phones and watches you are precisely the people I dont want to be sat next to at the cinema.

The world doesnt end while you are sat in the cinema. Why do you need to know the time? You know how long the film lasts. When the film ends that much time will have elapsed.

[nauticant]

it was kind of as a tension reliever, as that makes sense.

Assuming you're for real, do you realise that your tension reliever is someone else's spoiling their sense of immersion?

[wintertimeisfun]

i wish MN had a 'like' button for other people to click on. some of the posts are really good and deserve recognition

[hmc]

OP now needs help?!?!

There are some fruit loops on here tonight -

[yarn33]

Phones do not need to be full brightness to be distracting, even a screen at low brightness appears bright when it is in a dark cinema coming from a dark area (the seating areas which are unlit). This is why phones have different brightness settings, they are just as perceptible to the human eye at lower settings if there are fewer light sources nearby. Humans have evolved to be distracted by sudden changes in dark corners for obvious reasons.

[JodieGarberJacob]

Don't phones have a vibrate option any more? That would negate the world having to check every 5 minutes for the babysitter. No vibration = no crisis.

[Sparklingbrook]

why do you need to know the time at the cinema when you are watching a film?

[LessMissAbs]

Your friend was rude, and you were very rude

No, I wasn't rude. I waited until the end of the film to point out that I, as a third person not involved in their little disagreement, was disturbed by the loudness of her voice.

In fact, if it hadn't been my friend who was involved, I might still have said something at the end.

There are ways of dealing with such things politely, and shouting out in the middle of a cinema isn't one of them. Which is why I didn't.

tbh I got the impression (and I may be projecting, but anyway) that this woman was just waiting to be annoyed.

[HyvaPaiva]

You don't care that the light distracted her but you do care that her voice distracted you? Can you see the selfish double standard there?

She wasn't rude. Your friend was wrong to use your phone. And you were a bit dramatic to start it all up again after the film. You actually don't sound 'mortified', you sound like you enjoyed the fuss. It's the way it comes across on here, in any case.

[Yamyoid]

The great big multiplex in our town has lights on the floor and ceiling, it's not particularly dark anyway. That's really annoying.
The woman should have asked politely, she overreacted.

[YouTheCat]

Suelford, you are great.

Generally if I'm in the cinema I'm not bothered what the time is because I am enjoying the film.

[wintertimeisfun]

maybe she was hormonal....so was realsing her frustration more in the form an outburst as opposed to polite communication

[LessMissAbs]

HarpyFishwifeTwat you are actually the woman, aren't you?

(if you knew the location of where this happened, you would see why your username seems so apt!)

Lets just say your username kind of sums up the woman in question.

[nauticant]

What the booming woman was probably doing was making her complaint so public that you and your very rude friend will think twice about doing this again.

In doing that, the booming woman has provided a public service.

[hmc]

In that case, you should have passed her a web link to mumsnet Sparklingbrook - it would be her spiritual home

[BunnyLebowski]

Less you were rude then and you're being rude to other posters now.

Hardly helping your case is it?

[Caitlin17]

I'm with the woman. I might also have told your friend to put her phone. It is extremely annoying and bad manners to play around with a lit up phone.

So she was not being unreasonable but you and your friend need to learn some manners.

[LessMissAbs]

HyviPavia You don't care that the light distracted her but you do care that her voice distracted you? Can you see the selfish double standard there?

No, because as a third party to their argument, the only thing that disturbed the film for me was this great loud booming voice attempting to be as belittling and caustic as possible.

I think it would be obvious to any sane adult that another adult was not playing with her phone.

Complete overreaction to disturb other people in her annoyance.

[WorrySighWorrySigh]

You asked if YWBU. Quite a few people have said 'yes'.

There is a clue there. Your behaviour and your friend's behaviour will have annoyed some people.

[JodieGarberJacob]

Maybe all cinemas should employ a boomer? Might embarrass selfish people into actually thinking about others once in a while.

[hmc]

Meant LessMissAbs!

[YouTheCat]

Why does your friend need to keep checking the time?

[bruffin]

We have had thos before. Stick it on vibrate if you are worried about babysitters, siit on end of row near exit and go outside to check phonebif goes out.
Its never a dim light its a light that can be seen all over the cinema.
I just go and have a word with security guard they will always have a word and tell them to turn it. Even from the bottom you see a face lit up by the phone so easy to spot.