to be fed up with my bum? (warning - medical heebie jeebies!!)

[prettybutclumpy]

I am ten days post-op following the insertion of a seton for an anal fistula. Therein lies my first problem - this is a truly disgusting condition, and not easy to talk about with anyone! I have a temporary elastic band running from a large open sore (site of previous abscess), crossing beside my ladybits, into my rectum and along a tunnel (fistula) into my colon and out through my rectum and tied in a knot - yeuch!!)

My surgeon made light of this procedure, and did not alert me to the problems which I've suffered. I can even now only sit on a dining/computer chair for about ten minutes at a time (standing as I type!), experience twinges of pain when I walk, and can hardly walk to the end of the road. I'm also really tired!

I was given a fit note from the hospital for two weeks, which I am really worried won't be enough.

My DH is being v supportive, and doing lots with the DCs and the house, so I know I'm lucky there, but I am just miserable with it...

The biggest thing I'm worried about is that this is only a precursor to more serious surgery in a few weeks' time, which potentially will ruin Christmas!

I know this won't kill me (my dear sis had cancer last year and I appreciate it is NOTHING like that) and won't hopefully go on for ever, but AIBU to have a wee moan to you all?

[prettybutclumpy]

Yellow, I have messaged you - many thanks for your input, and I hope you'll have time to respond.

Gobbin, that sounds horrid. Good luck with whatever happens.

Digerd that's incredible! Although obvs a v serious operation for yourself. Do hope it has been a success.

Everyone else, thanks so much for your support - it means a lot when you can't discuss your nether regions with your friends v easily!

[SomethingOnce]

YANBU - if it was me you'd be able to hear me moaning about it from your house.

Get well soon, OP

[gobbin]

I'm soon to have a seton in my abcess before I'm put on Infliximab and I can't find anyone online saying anything positive about having it done!!

My abcess and I have coexisted since 2006, generally without much issue apart from the initial burst and the odd occasion when it's needed stiff antibiotics. I'm still waiting to be convinced by the surgeon that it's a) strictly necessary and b) not going to leave me worse off than I am now.

Arghh! You have my every sympathy. Get yourself signed off for longer. Health is more important than your job.

[YellowDinosaur]

And absolutely get the sick note extended by your gp. Doesn't found like you'd be fit to work

[YellowDinosaur]

You shouldn't be in this much pain from a simple seton insertion. Did you have an abscess drained at the same time? If not I'd call the consultant secretary and ask for them to check things out. I'm a surgical registrar who has just spent a year doing colorectal surgery. Feel free to pm me if you want.

[ChestyCoffin]

Poor you! My friend has had exactly the same procedure and suffered too
Keep topped up with painkillers.
Am sure GP will extend fit note.

[Letitsnow9]

I know someone who went through similar and had so many ops and admissions for infection, seemed like forever but she is now fully healed, there's light at the end of the tunnel (no pun intended). Horrible for you though, shame our society says you could tell anyone you have switches or surgery in your mouth but not so easy to say to strangers (don't bump into me, I've got bands and switches in my bum)

[digerd]

You have my sympathy. I was in hospital having my neck cut open and my Thyroid sub-totally removed and had staples holding the neck together. Had no pain. A young girl in our ward had had a boil removed from her anus and it was agony- like having barbed wire in there she said.
3 of us were walking around looking like Frankenstein's monster and couldn't move our heads, but we were so glad we didn't have what she had done.
Hope you are soon feeling better.

[valiumredhead]

Ouch you poor love

[verytellytubby]

Ouch. Wishing you a speedy recovery.

[prettybutclumpy]

Thanks to all for your concern - it has really helped! CrohnicallyLurking I don't have Crohn's, but I know all this sort of stuff is common for pwC, so I feel desperately sorry for anyone with it!

I have upped my painkillers, ordered a rubber ring online and bought Epsom salts for adding to my bath, so feeling a little more in control if nothing else. And have resolved to ask for another week off work if things don't dramatically improve.

Thanks again for your sympathies!

[mineofuselessinformation]

Sorry to hear you're suffering. Do ask for some better pain relief, but be aware that some can cause constipation so you might need laxatives too. Take as long as you need to recover - if you can't sit or walk comfortably you can't work can you? - and I can't imagine your gp would object to extending your sick leave.

[justmyview]

Ah poor you, hope you feel a bit better soon

[Flossyfloof]

You poor girl. I have suffered from piles since the age of 21 (now 53) and although I have them pretty well under control now, well remember how very painful they were. Try not to be embarrassed and take it easy. After this, maybe the surgery won't be too bad. And try not to worry too much about Christmas - the day will come and the day will go. Can you go somewhere else for the day, to save you having to cook? Or do Christmas nearer New Year?

[propertyNIGHTmareBEFOREXMAS]

You are being very, very brave and it sounds like you having a horrible time. I would be moaning in your shoes! You should not feel at all bad about being fed up with it all

[YoniGetAnOohWithTyphoo]

YANBU! This kind of problem (anything bum/fanjo related) can make you feel as miserable, unsexy and embarrassed as hell, and it isn't like you can just moan to the milkman or the checkout cashier about it (well not unless you are alarmingly open - i did once get a perfect stranger tell me about their prolapse when i worked on a checkout at weekends during uni and it was pretty uncomfortable to say the least) -so if you need to moan about it here you just go ahead! you have my sympathy!

[Delayingtactic]

Ooh that is sore. I'm sorry your surgeon didn't explain the after effects thoroughly. It is so sore. Where are you having the tightening done? How long do they think it will be there for? (You need a sick note for as long as that at least). Patients tell me they do lie down a lot on their side and most decide to work from home or not at all. I'd suggest taking regular pain relief - even if you feel the pain is ok, it is much easier to stop pain developing, than stop it once it has already started. Only thing is careful of constipation drugs and take something like senna and lactulose alongside it.

Fwiw, all doctors can write sick notes for as long as they like. Hospital doctors are not restricted to two weeks but for as long as they think you need to be off work (in the last week I've signed people off for two weeks, six weeks and a couple for three months). I personally would call up the consultants secretary and ask her to post you one.

[Fakebook]

Oh my gosh. Yanbu. I think I had an anal fissure after dc2 and it lasted for months. Only now (just as dc3 is about to be born, haha!) do I feel properly healed in my bum but still suffer terrible piles.

Bum pain is the worse. I hope it gets better soon. Just keep thinking at the end of this, you'll be healed and better again.

[Thecurlywurlymum]

Moan away all you like. My dd was too embarrassed to say anything until the pain became too much. She ended up having an emergency op at 3 in the morning and staying in hospital for a week ( type 1 diabetes). She is 20 and didn't want mum to have a look. I have never seen anything as bad as that abscess. Took a very long time to heal as the wound was the size of an ice cream scoop. Hospital cleaned and packed it every day as she needed gas and air to cope. She's no wimp but god it was bad

Don't expect miracles too soon. The bum area seems to take ages to heal. I hope you feel better soon and take care xx

[appletarts]

WTF!!!!??? I'm even scared to read all those details. Do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself and sod everyone else until you're better. Sounds traumatic!

[onlysettleforbutterflies]

You poor thing, I have had a similar op for fistula, spasms and piles, the pain pre and post op was horrendous, made 10 times worse because of the embarrassment factor. I have since had an emergency cesarean which was a walk in the park in comparison. Definitely go to your gp to extend your sicknote, you can't rush going back to work. My recovery after my 2nd op was much quicker tho, so try not to worry about Christmas just yet.

Btw after op number 2 I have since had no problems again, even during pregnancy.

Get well soon.

[holidaysarenice]

Would a rubber ring on a chair help and aim ur sorest bit in the circle?

Plus you can have a fit line extended easily.

[cardamomginger]

Fuck. That sounds ghastly. I'm so sorry. I've had major gynae surgery that has involved an extremely painful undercarriage, so I can sympathise. I remember how much it hurt to sit. BTW - 10 days post-op is nothing. Walking to the end of your (I hope very short) street is the max you should be aiming for. You should be resting as much as possible. Definitely get signed off for longer. Keep upp with your pain killers and make sure you don't get constipated.
Oh and YANBU. Obviously!

[Meglet]

My IBS means I'm prone to fissures. It's the most wretched pain I've known. So loads of sympathy from me.

[AquaticNocturne]

More sympathy from another lady with Chron's here. I'll never take a healthy bum for granted again! Get well soon .