To not want my daughter looking at image of concentration camps

[Coffeeessential]

My daughter has just started Yr 5, and is studying World War 2 this year. She was already having difficulty coping with the subject as she is so sensitive, but I saw nothing wrong with her being given the basic facts as long as there was not too much detail - She's only nine after all.
When she came home very quiet yesterday afternoon, she told me that the class had been looking at online images of 'Jews in concentration camps', and I am furious. While I understand that we cannot protect children from the world forever, surely nine is too young to even begin comprehending such terrible images?
I would appreciate other people's opinions, before I go crashing into the Headmaster's office!

[sashh]

I think 9 is perfect. Old enough to understand and be upset, but that is different to being upset and not understanding.

There are children from Syria in camps just over the boarders. They are not being systematically killed, they are having to work though, they are not sleeping in beds, they do not have enough to eat.

OP maybe if/when your dd is prime minister she will be doing something about whatever is happening to children then.

[ubik]

here is a link to the Anne Frank Trust

[ErrolTheDragon]

My DD was taken by her school to the Imperial War Museum holocaust exhibition ... in yr9. That's much more the appropriate age.

BTW as someone mentioned 'the boy in the striped pyjamas' please note what some primary teachers fail to, that it says that while it is about a 9 year old boy it is not intended for 9 year olds! (not a good book anyway IMO but that's probably a whole other thread)

[Igloofornow]

I'm going to start a new thread around this, so as not to derail this one, I hope that's ok.

[valiumredhead]

Lots of people seem concerned that their children nearly cried, I'd be more concerned if they weren't upset tbh. Crying is not a bad thing imo.

[mummytime]

My DD's teacher in year 5 started to read The Boy in the Stripped Pyjamas. I complained and the teacher hadn't read to the end herself, when she did she stopped reading the book to the class.
My DD at 9/10 was too sensitive for that book. She studied the Holocaust last year in year 9, and whilst finding it upsetting it didn't provoke the kind of totally unable to cope horror that it would have when she was younger.

Just because children of 9/10 were killed in the holocaust doesn't mean we should traumatise our 9/10 year olds with graphic images.

[Retropear]

No not bothered about crying,I am bothered about nightmares and being needlessly disturbed in a damaging way at such a young age.

Kids differ.

I saw pictures in secondary and couldn't sleep for weeks,found pics really disturbing.

For my children y5 is waaaaaay too young.There is no need.They know all about concentration camps.

[Goldenbear]

Yes, ValiumRedhead, I was 7 and had reoccurring nightmares about the executions on and off for about 4 years.

I'm not entirely convinced that early exposure of these images always achieves the virtuous objectives of the adults providing this 'education'. I think that continuous exposure and reminders can sometimes make the audience war-weary.

[Retropear]

The Holocaust Exhibition in the IWM says it isn't recommended for children under 14- for a reason.

[Chopstheduck]

skimmed through the thread.


OP I dont think the school was being unreasonable, but I do empathise with your dd being upset by it and I think the school and you could have been better prepared for it, so you could help your daughter a bit more.



FWIW, children are allowed in the Imperial War museum exhibition, I think it was just recommended that it wasn't suitable for under 14s. My children went last year, they were 7, 10 and 12. We'd been to Amsterdam the previous year, and then on to Germany, and visited Neuengamme and Belsen-Bergen. The children were incredibly shocked, they asked lots and lots of questions, but they certainly weren't left traumatised by learning about it. They are still young, but they learned an awful lot from it, and about politics, and how the world works. I think the key is to teach them the wider picture and not focus on just the camps and children being torn from their homes which is terrifying for any young child.

[insanityscratching]

Dd's school used "Goodnight Mr Tom" and "The Machine Gunners" rather than anything related to the Holocaust.

[WoTmania]

YANBU - most people will find those images distressing whatever their age but IMO 9 is too young to be able to cope with those feelings for some children.
I was a bit younger (7/8) when we were just told about the holocaust and I had nightmares for weeks and really struggled to cope with the information. I had a very negative outlook on life and depression from a young age and wonder now if, similar to the post above, it was in part being exposed to the ideas of the awful things humans could do to each other.
I agree that children and young people need to know what happened but would question the way this has been handled

[Saltire]

I agree with the others who say if they were left to Google on their own then YANBU.
I think at that age WW2 can (and should) be taught and the holocasue touched on, with images and more graphic details being kept for when they are older.
The Holocaust happened and shouldn't ever be forgotten or not taught ins chools, but at that age, there other aspects of WW2 that can be taught too. 9 year olds aren't aways mature enough to understand the politics behind what happened and to deal with it.

[quoteunquote]

quote aren't they better being taught about politics from a young age then?

They need to know what happens when politics fail, and why they need to work really hard at making sure they don't fail. (something most adults need to engage with)

I do understand it is horrific, but it is far more dangerous for them not to know.

I have three autistic children, they got it from me, we all over image process, so I do get that it is disturbing.

If you talk to your children and explain why we need to share this information with them, they will understand that we share in the hope they will never experience atrocities.

Unfortunately it is one of the ones we have to suck it up and make sure that everyone knows the full set of circumstances, and for that images need to be used, because without no one would understand.

When the pictures of the camps, came out at the end of the war, everyone was shocked, no one had comprehended what had been happing. we still have deniers.

You can talk about what happened as much as you want, it isn't until you see with your own eyes you start to understand.

Lets hope all the potential future Hitlers are having these classes, and choose a different path.

[Chopstheduck]

from what I remember of the exhibition there were a couple of bits we did prevent the children from seeing, possibly of a sexual nature? I'm not sure. For the most part, it was very interesting to them though.

[Retropear]

To be fair Chops it was your choice for your children.Kids differ hugely.

If something isn't recommended for under 14s I'd want to be consulted.

Still not getting the need.You can learn loads re concentration camps without looking at pictures at this age.

[HorryIsUpduffed]

I think the argument that they have it worse in Syria is specious. Nobody would wish what those children are seeing on anyone. There's a huge spectrum of "appropriate introduction" between living in a war zone and pretending everyone is lovely to everyone all the time.

Whether an image or an idea is more upsetting depends on the child. Some people are very visual, some process sounds better. If you're a visual person then an image of something horrific stays with you longer than being told about it. With that in mind, I think also it's fair to say that the same image will be differently traumatic to children even of the same emotional capacity or sensitivity.

My oldest is in Y1 so I can't comment on the suitability for a 9yo but I'm surprised it would be considered appropriate to show bodies in mass graves, or images of executions, etc. Those are the kind of images that aren't shown before the watershed on TV, for example.

That said, I do agree that it's important for us to slowly and gradually teach our children that people do bad things, with examples, so that when they do first encounter the real horrors those don't come completely out of the blue.

DS(5) has asked about Syria when he's seen images in our newspaper of for example a line of shrouds, or burning buildings. So we've had to talk about how sometimes people in power don't necessarily want the best for the people in their country and try to hurt them. It's horrible because we all want to live in the world inside a 5yo's head where nobody is mean to anyone except by accident, and we want them to believe in that world for as long as possible.

[zatyaballerina]

yabu, it's good to make that emotional impact on them while they are young and good enough to care, they'll never forget it and putting that into the pschye of every child is the best way of ensuring it doesn't happen within our political borders in the future because they will grow up caring enough to make sure it doesn't.

Meanwhile there are millions of children in this world suffering very similar horrors to what your child only saw from a picture. Those lucky enough to live in a safe country during safe times need to know that those dangerous places were once 'safe' too, that could be us or our children/grandchildren one day. Ignorance is not innocence and education is the best defense against the worst possibilities.

[gleegeek]

Dd(10) is just learning about WW2. She is a very sensitive, imaginative child who seems to feel things more deeply than others. She is finding it extremely tough going but I think the school so far are pitching it at roughly the right level. I would be very unhappy if she had been allowed to google images of concentration camps etc unsupervised, there are ways of approaching horrific subject matter sympathetically and at the right level for the children, so that they learn from it rather than be scarred by it.

I fully anticipate dd will attempt to save the world when she grows up, she doesn't need even more graphic images than the ones she is quite capable of painting in her own head to do this...

Our homework this week is to find out about The Blitz as a family and how it affected our local area. Also to discuss what it was like to be a child during the war. Looking forward to this!

[gleegeek]

Btw I have visited both Dachau and Terezin and we have discussed them with dd, but I wouldn't let her google for pictures...

[ukatlast]

I just googled 'concentration camps' and the black and white pictures which come up are not really suitable for sensitive 9 year olds so YANBU that unsupervised googling was not the way to go.

I first heard about the Holocaust (as a 9 year old actually) when my friend's father told us in general terms how awful it was. He had been in the forces and said he had liberated a concentration camp if I understood correctly. He was an 'older Dad' and is now dead.

There was also a TV drama series called the Holocaust that I remember watching (in the 70's?) but don't think it was as graphic as those black an white images.

[BrokenSunglasses]

There is no question that they shouldn't have been told to google holocaust images, YWNBU to raise that with the school.

I agree with PPs who have said that there is a big difference between teaching about what happened and showing the actual images. I have talked to my 13yo about what porn is, but I wouldn't let him watch it!

I did however take him into the exhibition at the imperial war museum, along with his 11yo brother. I made that choice as a parent who knows her children and had discussed it with them, but I wouldn't have liked them seeing it on a school trip if it had been allowed, and I appreciated that there was age warning because it helped me make the choice for my children. I'm glad they saw it, and I'm sure it will stay with them for the rest of their lives, not only because of what they saw but also because of the atmosphere in there.

I don't think it's about whether children are too young or not, I think it's about whether an individual child has the ability to cope with emotions that strong images might provoke. Some children won't have that ability at 9 years old, so schools should always be extra cautious.

[Ginnytonic82]

This is so difficult because it's important to get the right balance. As a teacher in secondary school, I've seen kids as young as 11 look at horrifying images and read testimonials from people who had first hand experience of life in concentration camps and laugh, poke fun and make jokes about it, because they've never been taught to respect it. I don't know if the school in question feels it's necessary to imprint the magnitude of the holocaust on to its students at such a young age prior to them becoming desensitised.

[ukatlast]

'Goodnight Mister Tom' (Film) used in Y6 at my son's school has a hideously upsetting scene involving the boy holding onto a still born baby locked in a cupboard for days.
Not quite sure it was necessary to the story but I expect it was supposed to symbolise all the Holocaust suffering. Instead it probably served to make kids think that all British families were cruel to their own kids never mind what the Nazis did. Found it very hard to watch as an adult but babies are my crumple zone.
The school wanted a signed parental consent to watching the film but my son didn't bring it home in time and still got to watch it. Fine I would have consented anyway but I do think that scene is probably too strong for many Y6s.

[candycoatedwaterdrops]

I don't know why people are sad and shocked that their children are sad and shocked, it's a normal response. Do you shield your children from the news and from newspapers? Every day, we hear about horrific things going on and often, we are shown horrific pictures. It's good for children to learn that there is a world outside of their childhood and their little world.