To be annoyed at my friend for booking her birthday party...

[Itsmybluminbirthday]

On my actual birthday?

That day is not her birthday.

She knew it was my birthday.

Or am I being childish?

Have name changed.

[maddening]

take your own bday cake along - with the news of the baby it'll be your party too (without the faff of organising it)

[mirry2]

My mil has the same birthday as me. Her dh regularly organises a family clebratonf for her to which I go. Nobody acknowledges that it's also my birthday (although they know) but it doesn't bother me at all. My mil deserves her celebration and all the family around her.

[Xmasbaby11]

YANBU .. it's a bit weird on a weeknight. I'm guessing she is busy the weekend before / after and it is the best time for her.

I'm not sure I would go unless it's mutual friends - purely because I'd want to spend the evening with DH and/or close friends.

[MrsWembley]

Oh wow, fucking congratulations!!!! That's an amazing piece of news to share! How far along are you? Is the timing ok to share with RL friends?

How many of the friends who will be there are aware that it's your birthday on that date? Do you think she's forgotten? Is she a cahhhh?

[waltermittymissus]

DO announce it!

Or, failing that, send an email reply but to everyone on the list, saying you're sorry you can't make it but since it's your actual BIRTHDAY you have BIRTHDAY plans.

[VashtaNerada]

"I'd turn up" obv...

[VashtaNerada]

YANBU, would piss me right off! If turn up with a big 'Birthday Girl' badge, balloons and party hat

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

And congratulations blumin. You should definitely turn up to the party, be gracious and sweet, and then at an opportune moment say 'No, I'm not drinking, even though its my birthday today, because I is up duffed innit.'

Or something equally erudite

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

Absolutely I celebrate my birthday each year. Any excuse for a crate of wine good party!

And why not?

This year I turned 30 and managed to keep the celebrations going for a whole week.

Why should the kids get all the fun?

[miffybun73]

Yes, yes - do announce it on the night. Congratulations :)

[ReginaldBlinker]

magicberry Yes, of course I have a party each year! And normally one the weekend before and the weekend after just for good measure. (being completely serious)

bluminbirthday You know you have to do that, right?! It's only fair!!

[Itsmybluminbirthday]

I'm off the booze as pregnant. We haven't told any of our friends yet, so I could choose this night to announce it...

Ok, now I'm just being evil

[magicberry]

I'm a bit surprised how many people on this thread think adults' birthdays are a big deal. Do you all have parties each year?
I wouldn't think of this as a big deal at all, sorry

[Whocansay]

Will you? Or will you get drunk and tell her she's a 'cah'...

[CaptainSweatPants]

hmmm
I wouldn't go

I always spend my actual birthday with dh & dcs

Celebrate with friends before or after the actual day

[Itsmybluminbirthday]

It'll be an interesting night, whatever happens! I plan on being the soul of gentility however.

[Loopytiles]

If the invitation came by email or facebook, you could reply to all and say "great, I'll be 21 again that day, can celebrate that too!"

[Squitten]

It depends on whether you are planning to do anything on your actual birthday. If so, then tell her the reason you can't go to her party and don't feel bad about missing it. If not then I would go.

[Whocansay]

You can make suppositions about this all night and never know - it may be she's a cow trying to upstage you, she could just be inconsiderate or she may have forgotten it's your birthday.

If you feel uncomfortable about it, decline the invitation and tell her you have already made plans for your birthday. Then arrange a fabulous night for you birthday with your friends - making sure its the Saturday night before your actual birthday....

[sebastianthesingingaubergine]

And if so, and if I were you, I would be positively wallowing in her mortification when she realises. On the night.

[sebastianthesingingaubergine]

Perhaps she has Forgotten its your birthday!

[MrsWembley]

...in a Welsh accent...

[Hassled]

I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. I'd be mightily hacked off. It's just such a weird thing to do.

You need to talk to her - say "Mate, this is a weird thing to do. What's occurring?".

[ILetHimKeep20Quid]

It does seem a bit random if it's a school night

[IamChristmas]

It was awkward. However you have done nothing wrong, so you have nothing to feel bad about. Hopefully your friends will look out for you and if it makes her squirm that's her problem.