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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Kissing goodbye at school

65 replies

OneToThree · 26/09/2013 10:22

AIBU to think it's not on to make your child give you a kiss goodbye before going into school when they clearly don't want to?

My ds 6 doesn't want to and I wouldn't dream of making him.

OP posts:

WorraLiberty · 27/09/2013 21:59

When my DS was in year 2 I was standing gossiping chatting to another Mum.

All of a sudden I noticed the line was going in, and I panicked and kissed the wrong child!

They're in year 6 now and the poor boy still avoids me, with a look of terror in his eyes

Emilyeggs · 27/09/2013 22:02

i kiss and cuddle my dc all the time, but only if they want me to

How about when you want to op?

DramaAlpaca · 27/09/2013 22:04

My 13 year old nephew totally forgot himself & gave his mum a kiss goodbye outside school last week, in front of his friends. He was mortified, she was secretly thrilled.

fieldfare · 27/09/2013 22:08

My dd is 11 and is still a cuddly and kissy girl. I love it. On the odd occasion when she's got the hump over something, I call out to her that I love her. When she ignores me I get louder and louder "but dd, I REALLY love you, I'm going to miss you all day long!" she then walks off trying not to smile and failing. I know I've cheered her up by being daft and I don't care how many people know that I love her.
Even her friends greet me with a hug, especially if they're a but glum about something.

WorraLiberty · 27/09/2013 22:08

Drama, when my DS1 was about 13 he was going on a residential trip with the school.

He gave me a kiss and a cuddle as he got on the coach and his mates started taking the piss.

He turned to them and said, "So? I love my Mum, don't you love yours?"

They looked offended and said, "Yes of course we do".

So he said, "Good, then go and give them a kiss"

One by one they all turned and kissed their Mums...who just stood there looking stunned but secretly pleased.

DramaAlpaca · 27/09/2013 22:21

Worra that's a lovely story. DS1 who's nearly 20 will now happily hug me in front of his friends. His younger brothers aren't quite as brave .

BrawToken · 27/09/2013 22:41

Kiss them as much as possible when they are wee :)

HorryIsUpduffed · 27/09/2013 23:31

I agree that making them accept hugs/kisses isn't the same as making them give hugs/kisses. I've deliberately never insisted on the latter.

Namechangesforthehardstuff · 27/09/2013 23:42

'making them accept hugs/kisses'

Oh dear.

HorryIsUpduffed · 28/09/2013 08:00

Oh dear?

elfycat · 28/09/2013 08:10

I insisted DD1, reception year, kissed DH before running into school. She doesn't normally kiss us as she's too busy following her friends in. But he was going away to work for 3 weeks before she's get home, and we'll see him again mid-Oct. I think I'll be insisting on kisses for him for many years - but only once every 6 weeks.

One of my acquaintances / potential friends amongst the parent is a social working working for SS. Maybe I should check?

elfycat · 28/09/2013 08:11

*social worker
she'd

ballstoit · 28/09/2013 08:29

DS is 8. Each morning he walks off, I call 'you've forgotten something'. He comes back and I kiss him.

To an outsider, that might look like me forcing him to kiss goodbye. To DS and I, it's part of our morning. He needs to seem reluctant to kiss me, so as not to be embarrassed in front of his friends. However, the one morning I didn't do it, he complained in the evening that I hadn't kissed him.

Namechangesforthehardstuff · 28/09/2013 08:42

Yup.

elinorbellowed · 28/09/2013 17:26

I am going to bawl my eyes out the day DS stops wanting a kiss. He's Year 2 and always kisses me and runs at me at pick-up. I reckon that even if embarrassed, kids still feel loved and that is more important than what their mates think.

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