To be pissed off that DP is making himself scrambled eggs on toast now, while I am making a roast chicken dinner for 1pm?

[Shutupanddrive]

As well as being in my bloody way when I'm trying to prepare the veg!
He hasn't had any breakfast, so has decided to have scrambled eggs on toast now. 4 slices of toast and god knows how many eggs.
Aibu to think he should have had breakfast earlier?
Or just bloody wait?
Or at least have less food?
Don't know why I bother, grrr
He thinks it doesn't matter as long as he eats his lunch

[LividofLondon]

BooCanary that would really get my goat. I used to get irritated when I'd give my ex-BF a countdown to when I was dishing up dinner only to have him still be sat at the dining room table on his laptop until I was about to serve it. It irritated me further that I actually had to explain to him that the least he could do was make himself and the table ready. He said if I want him to do something I should just ask as he doesn't take hints. Perhaps I thought as he was a grown man he would realise without being told that I'd need a clear table to put the food on, and that cutlery would also be useful I didn't expect to have to treat him as though I was house-training a child

[BooCanary]

Glad it worked out in the end OP.
I think YWNBU, it would drive me insane. But then I come from a family where respect is given to the person slaving away to provide a delicious meal.

Unlike in DHs family, when (despite 20 minute, 10 minute and 5 minute warnings) often FIL, BIL (and sometimes DH if he has been led astray) don't turn up for ages after it is ready as they were busy doing crucial man things. They seem to believe that us poor women/slaves must understand they can't be rushed just because someone has had the bad planning of not psychically realising 3 hours before that they would be looking at a car engine/fettling with some tools/still in the pub at 2pm.

[McNewPants2013]

If I am hungry I will eat, if not I go behond hungry and it puts me off from eating.

He shouldn't have got in your way though.

[Frikadellen]

I would be annoyed too.
If hungry at that point have a slice of toast and a cuppa then you will be ready for lunch

[HorryIsUpduffed]

Glad to hear a happy ending. Hope he dries and puts away too

[Shutupanddrive]

He's still washing up, on the 3rd bowl of hot water haha

[Jolleigh]

Shutupanddrive - great news, we'll let him off

Flipchart - I'm a bit of a scrambled egg snob...my mum used to microwave them and it seriously has put me off for life Pan made with a bit of butter, milk and horseradish for me ta

[mrsjay]

least he ate it just tell him next time not tog et under your feet,

[SilverApples]

A happy ending OP, how nice!
Tell him before next time, so he doesn't cock up twice.

[flipchart]

Bread in a toaster
Eggs, butter, salt and pepper in a bowl mix, put in a microwave for 1 minute. mix, micro a few seconds more mix eat.
Bowl and plate in the dishwasher, carry on helping.

That's how it works in our house without people falling out.

Dh never seems to mind and I don't mind if he gets something.

If he said he doesn't care about her cooking the meal, well that is a different topic and is indeed disrespectful.

[Shutupanddrive]

Update! Yes he did eat it followed by blackberry pie.
He is now doing the washing up while I am sitting drinking wine with parents, dc's watching a film
Think I will let him off then

[NonnoMum]

I would be annoyed too.

Disrespecting your plans. Getting in the way. It also undermines you as alpha-female in the house.

I have a grown up stepson who will only eat his own food. So, sometimes after a lovely meal has all been cleaned up and the kitchen 'put to bed' will saunter into the kitchen and make himself some odd concoction using all sorts of random pots and pans, which will be cleaned up not to my standard.

a grit-your-teeth and bear it problem rather than a dealbreaker. Probably similar for you - although your partner should know better about annoying a woman in her own kitchen.

[mrsjay]

that he'll go in her way to make his own food, he's telling her he doesn't care that she has prepared that 'nice' meal for him.

this I know people will say oh its dramatic blah blah but i agree with you it is self centred to go and make yourself and getting inthe way of somebody cooking a big meal for a lot of people,

[Nagoo]

YANBU. Yes he is a grown up, so he should have got his breakfast at a reasonable time to be able to enjoy the lunch that the OP has spent time and effort making for her family. I'd be proper pissed off. If he was choosing his own food for the day, then when he eats is his business, but when she has told him 'big lunch at 1pm' and he decides that he'll go in her way to make his own food, he's telling her he doesn't care that she has prepared that 'nice' meal for him.

[ZenGardener]

Also wondering if he ate it or not!

I have to admit I made scrambled eggs earlier after reading this thread :)

[yegodsandlittlefishes]

flipchart when my husband tried that( however long ago), I explained to him that for the hour before cooking a roast dinner, it is all systems go. No room for pans of eggs or extra bodies who are not helping. He got the point, and now he'll ask what he can do to help. DH also knows I'm allergic to eggs and hate the smell of them cooking, so it would be doubly self centred of him to get up late and fix cooked food for just himself (in our small kitchen).

[mrsjay]

can't see how he is being disrespectful. Everyone who thinks so is making a drama over a couple of eggs and toast

because she is trying to cook dinner and he is in there making bloody eggs it is just annoying and disrespectful to somebody who is cooking YOUR dinner ,

[SilverApples]

Well, they don't live together, so she can always send him home.

[flipchart]

Somedays I have hungry days.
I could do what Op's partner has done ok maybe not 4 slices of toast and then eat my lunch. It's usually after I've had a night out.

I'm just laughing my head off at the cocklodger comments because somebody eats an hour before a main meal.
What next LTB?
I don't get why it's inconsiderate along as he tidies up afterwards.

But like most threads that involve a man doing something that an OP doesn't approve of things get blown out of all proportion (i.e cocklodger, behaving like a toddler) then all the mad suggestions like is he being passive aggressive.
oh wel,l never a dull moment!

[FrauMoose]

I think being grownup involves having consideration for/awareness of others. Its inconsiderate to prepare a large messy breakfast when somebody is preparing a big lunch - for which there'll be visitors - due to be served in an hour's time. If you neglected to have breakfast earlier and are suddenly famishing after physical activity you quickly grab just enough to keep going - a couple of bits of toast or a banana.

[flipchart]

That's very mature yegods

I'm glad my DH is tolerant and doesn't sabotage my food.
I would think he was an immature dick if he did that as well as wasting food.

[Tee2072]

Agreed flipchart.

[yegodsandlittlefishes]

Oh, if DH did that some anchovies or marmite or peanut butter (maybe all 3) would mysteriously find their way into the scrambled eggs. I think he did try it once. About 20 years ago.

[Jolleigh]

OP - we need to know if he ate his Sunday dinner!

I'd be mildly annoyed, but if he then didn't eat the meal I'd prepared I'd be majorly annoyed. My OH does things like this frequently and I could honestly strangle him when he does. I do the cooking (his food is truly disgusting if it's more complex than a toasty) and another one that gets me is when he complains that he's hungry at odd times and expects me to go and prep a full meal, even if I'm not. He's a pita but I'm sure I do something that must get right up his nose too