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AIBU?

To tell you I have a mental illness

168 replies

LEMisdisappointed · 05/08/2013 19:03

Time to talk are having a "big share" on the demon facebook to raise awareness of mental health issues and prejudice.

i think this link will work

I suffer from depression and anxiety - it skews they way i take things sometimes, so something that would go over my head normally really upsets me and i over analyse EVERYTHING. I am on citalopram which helps with my anxiety and means i can get through the day without having a meltdown. I manage to be a good mum and decent partner and think im fun to be around. I am not ashamed to have a mental illness.

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fishandmonkey · 05/08/2013 19:50

i'm ashamed. i'm very private about my mental health problems in RL. i'm so impressed at all of you who are able to be open but i feel like i would risk my job (work with children) and bring my ability to parent into question if i were honest with people.

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LEMisdisappointed · 05/08/2013 19:50

idiuntu - it was jogonkitty who got the idiotic posts on her FB, i am pretty selective about my FB friends and think i have wheedled out the idiots by now, also most people who know me know that i suffer from anxiety and would not appreciate smart ass comments.

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idiuntno57 · 05/08/2013 19:53

yes sorry can't work out how to remove my misdirected post.

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Melawen · 05/08/2013 19:53

That's an excellent campaign. I don't suffer with mental illness but my lovely SIL did (does?) and she's the last person I would have thought would suffer with depression. Have shared the campaign on my Facebook.

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LEMisdisappointed · 05/08/2013 19:53

fish, you shouldn't be ashamed, however you ARE entitled to be as private about it as you feel you need to be about it. I worried that my doctor and HCPs would question my parenting abilities and i have to say that in the 7 or so years that I have struggled, no aspersions have ever been cast. I know Im a good mum and so does my Dr! I think it helps that she has children the same age and we sort of "get" each other.

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LEMisdisappointed · 05/08/2013 19:54

no need to remove it :)

I have to say, i have noticed alot of "feline" inspired nicknames on this thread Grin

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BringOn2014 · 05/08/2013 19:57

I have a lot of anxiety issues and am a scalp picker too. Im not on any medication at the moment after I overdosed on anti-anxiety medication as a teenager, Im on an NHS waiting list for therapy, wont be seen until october at the earliest.

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LEMisdisappointed · 05/08/2013 20:00

Gosh, i honestly thought i was the only person in the world that did the scalp thing Shock I didn't think that anti-anxiety meds were recommended for teens, if they are of the SSRI variety - maybe have a word with your doctor?

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bountyeater · 05/08/2013 20:07

I have a history of mental illness - severe depression, eating disorders, compulsive hoarding. I'm very private about it as I do feel people make judgements. I've had my parenting questioned, as my dd has SN so we've had a fair bit of contact with professionals like paediatricians and social services. Lots of her behaviour was blamed on my parenting as a single parent with MH issues before she was diagnosed. I've also been criticised for not working and getting DLA, so I'm not open about that either.

If I'm honest, my MH needs have had an impact on my ability to parent, the symptoms mean that I often lack motivation and get very tired, and it's hard to be a good parent when you're barely able to get up and dressed yourself. And relationships have also suffered as I get mood swings, or sometimes want to isolate myself and find it a struggle to communicate my feelings. I'm often not much fun to be around as one of the symptoms of depression is to lose interest in activities so I find it hard to be sociable, so I've never managed well with playdates etc. I don't work because I can't cope with the pressure and social expectations. My mental illness has a massive impact on my quality of life and the life of those around me, I can't minimise that by saying that I'm still a great parent/partner/friend because I'm probably not when I'm having a severe episode.

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LittleMissGerardButlerfan · 05/08/2013 20:09

I have OCD and anxiety and will openly talk about it here, and have talked to people in real life about it, but am cautious who I tell as there is unfortunately a stigma attached to mental health, and a lot of people still think OCD means you just have a clean house.

My sister also has OCD so I thought she would understand more than others but just last week she called me strange and said some really horrible things to me.

I have some citalopram but I have yet to pluck up the courage to take them, the thing they are meant to help with, anxiety, is the thing that's stopping me taking them as I'm scared of the side effects especially as its school hols and I can't afford to be feeling off.

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idiuntno57 · 05/08/2013 20:13

it was only recently that I completely outed myself but I have to say I feel more at ease with myself than I have since I was diagnosed more than 20 years ago. Part of the confidence comes with age and the realisation that if people judge me negatively because of this then they are the losers not me. I realise this is easier because I am self employed.

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MissStrawberry · 05/08/2013 20:14

I have had bad experiences of sharing my MH situation. I was also sacked from a job because I wasn't brought up with my parents. I try and be casual about it but I am wondering now if it is why all the parents at school have stopped talking to me. At our previous school the same thing happened but was more obvious when they did it.

--having a really really crap evening so probably shouldn't have
posted.--

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BringOn2014 · 05/08/2013 20:17

LEM It was nearly 10years ago now and not in the UK so dont know what the recommendations were, It was Zanax.. Dont know if they even prescribe that anymore. My GP decided best not to prescribe me anything until Im getting some therapy and try a non medicated approach

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idiuntno57 · 05/08/2013 20:23

i remind myself a lot that 20yrs ago Cancer was similarly stigmatised

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Teamjavert · 05/08/2013 20:25

I have depression,anxiety issues,social anxiety and PTSD. I also self harm,though not by cutting.

I'm not on medication at the moment,but I'm considering going back on them as I've been in such a bad place lately. I am receiving therapy.

It doesn't help that I'm dyspraxic. That seems to aggravate/trigger some of my issues.

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Teamjavert · 05/08/2013 20:27

I am ashamed of it. I don't believe that having a mental illness is something one should be ashamed of,but I hold myself to a different standard.

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LEMisdisappointed · 05/08/2013 20:27

Teemjavert - i did read on the dyspraxia website that dyspraxics can be prone to depression, it made me sad as my DD has mild dyspraxia :(

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Littleen · 05/08/2013 20:30

yanbu to that, I have Bipolar disorder (depressed loads), eating disorder, anxiety and OCD, and I see lots of others too have various struggles :) you're not alone! Have tried loads of antidepressants (also citalopram) and anti-psychotica with no effect, starting up lamictal next week when I'm out of the first trimester, and counselling starts tomorrow! Fingers crossed it'll help a bit :)

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waterlego6064 · 05/08/2013 20:31

YANBU OP.

I have MH problems too. Anxiety, addictions, disordered eating, obsessive behaviour...

I scalp pick too- thought it was just me :)

I also pick my nose but I don't think that's connected to my MH- rather that I'm just generally disgusting Grin

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Littleen · 05/08/2013 20:33

I am open about my illnesses, as they have all been extremely visible in the past, regarding self harm, suicide attempts, anorexia and also ocd, so no point hiding it for friends and family. Not telling people at work though :) They have no need to know!

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ChuffMuffin · 05/08/2013 20:33

I have pretty entrenched obsessive compulsive disorder, depression and anxiety.

I have had OCD for over 20 years, and I wasn't formally diagnosed until last year as my condition isn't "classic" OCD.. I just spent all that time not being able to explain how I feel and thinking I was weird. I'm not even 30 yet!

I take sertraline, combined with hi impact exercise twice a week. I really, really really believe the exercise helps massively with my depression. I didn't go to the gym all last week and at the weekend I was feeling really frustrated and teary. Went to the gym today, 16 miles on the spin bike in 40 minutes, bit of weight training and I feel so much happier and calmer.

Am I ashamed of having OCD, depression and anxiety? Am I bollocks. Alright the OCD gets embarrassing but I can't help it, I didn't ask for it, so why should I be ashamed? Smile

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IfIonlyhadsomesleep · 05/08/2013 20:36

I have all sorts of things that I think need unpicking further and have had counselling for anxiety. It also cost me a job. The thing I am so pleased to have found this thread for is the scalp thing! I really thought it was just me. I used to do back too but I'm in a happier place now. Think I have add as well and am in the process of plucking up the courage to seek answers on that one.
Having had a mother with mh problems I have been in denial about stuff but really think I need some meds. I deserve to be as calm as the work I put into being calm justifies.

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Joanne279 · 05/08/2013 20:37

I wish I shared your optimism. I am suffering at present but I'm too ashamed to go to my gp and admit I need some help. Keep trying to tell myself I can cope.

Take my hat off to you guys x

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Szeli · 05/08/2013 20:39

I'm diagnosed with bipolar type 2 disorder and post natal depression (but I think that bits hooey) I'm on 1.2g lithium a day and have weekly visits from a psychiatric nurse, monthly visits with a psychiatric consultant and frequent health visitor sessions.

I've always been fairly open but since trying to take control I have been stigmatised at work by my line manager which is making me want to jack it in. I'm struggling anyway as the lithium makes me a bit queasy and I'm stressed to the hilt, I don't need some jumped up know nothing making me feel worse!

It helps me having a social worker as a best friend reassuring me that various diagnoses won't impact the way I'm viewed as a mother and how the system works with regards to removing children so I feel quite safe in that respect.

Thanks LEM for letting me get that off my chest

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IfIonlyhadsomesleep · 05/08/2013 20:40

Fwiw, I have several friends who, over time,have talked about mh issues. I've always been amazed at how people cope or hide things, although a bit sad that we feel sometimes we have to hide.

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