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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

DD being fed spaghetti hoops for breakfast

80 replies

Notimpressedhm · 03/08/2013 11:40

DD is 11 and has gone for her intro/try out in preparation for her starting boarding school in September. She has informed me that she has had spaghetti hoops for breakfast, she has no problem with it but Aibu to think this is not acceptable? I would like to think she was being fed nutritionally the same as she would be at home

OP posts:

bulletwithbutterflywings · 03/08/2013 12:51

No worse than cereal.

theodorakisses · 03/08/2013 12:58

We used to live in a boarding school, I was head of boarding and my husband was head. the boarding standards scrutinised our menus and whilst we had chips etc some days, we had a duty to educate the kids to make choices and carefully monitored them throughout the year. There will always be one or two who would eat nothing but sugar sandwiches but generally they chose a wide variety of foods, mostly healthy. The other thing is that they are very active when full boarding and do seem to want to eat a lot.
The try outers often didn't make great choices and would choose chips and beans etc, but once they had been with us for a few weeks would learn that we watched them and would send them back if they only had the crap, also the novelty wore off. You may find that she was feeling a little overwhelmed by the choices, was a bit hurried by the regulars who knew exactly what there was and where and just grabbed something that felt familiar. You are completely within your rights to worry, not least because you are both going to be feeling a bit anxious about this change. I expect the school do manage their boarders diet better than this and the issue is how they deal with your concerns, if you approach the houseparents and find them anything less than interested and supportive, i would worry.

IslaValargeone · 03/08/2013 13:00

£10k a term? Good grief, where is she?

That aside, I think spaghetti hoops for breakfast is rubbish tbh, but I am wondering if it was just 'fun, comfort food' for their try out day?

antimatter · 03/08/2013 13:01

out of interest OP - what hot breakfast does your DD have at home every day being vegetarian?

KoalaFace · 03/08/2013 13:01

Waffling ouch! Did you board as a child or something?

Bisjo That menu is crazy. I always imagined at boarding school there'd be an elderly cook making chicken fricassée and semolina! Too much preteen fiction!

Original poster

Notimpressedhm · 03/08/2013 13:08

Antimatter she usually has either poached, boiled or scrambled eggs, quorn sausages and occasionally pancakes topped with fruit

OP posts:

KoalaFace · 03/08/2013 13:12

NotImpressed Do you do a hot breakfast every day? That's very impressive!

Waffling · 03/08/2013 14:01

Meh - unless you're ill (which I hope the OP isn't) then there's no excuse for it.

Lazyjaney · 03/08/2013 14:02

Antimatter she usually has either poached, boiled or scrambled eggs, quorn sausages and occasionally pancakes topped with fruit

Blimey, I hate to think of the standard of lunch and dinner menus required! Good luck in your search for a school with enough Michelin stars OP.

Btw, it does help to look at the A* ratings too.....

trinity0097 · 03/08/2013 14:22

Our school kitchen will cook vegi sausages etc, but only if they know that a child is vegetarian, once your daughter starts they will know and expect her for breakfast. Did she ask for a vegi alternative? When we have vegi children in for breakfast, or gluten free ones, their sausages are kept hidden in the hot plate rather on show so that someone else doesn't eat them.

candycoatedwaterdrops · 03/08/2013 14:26

The school are going to LOVE you.

YouStayClassySanDiego · 03/08/2013 14:27

£10,000 a term, really?

Original poster

Notimpressedhm · 03/08/2013 14:51

Youstayclassy near enough 10k a term yes, this includes all excursions and trips plus 1 music lesson per week

OP posts:

difficultpickle · 03/08/2013 14:55

Koala that is a menu for one week. There are two others with a different range of food. Ds says the food is very good indeed. He likes food that he hated at his previous school because the cooking is so good. It has made a real difference to how well he has settled into his new school. I hadn't really thought about food before but it is something I will be looking at when we consider senior school options.

Boarding is a different environment from home which makes it even more important that the food they have is good quality and enjoyable to eat. I've been on business trips where the food has been utterly dreadful and it coloured my view of the trip and that was only a week. I can't imagine having to put up with that every day during term time for several years.

Lazyjaney all the breakfast options the OP stated are available at ds's school and it doesn't have any Michelin stars that I know of. I don't think the OP has unreasonable expectations at all.

IslaValargeone · 03/08/2013 14:56

Is that with Yehudi Menhuin?

YouStayClassySanDiego · 03/08/2013 14:58

£10,000 a term, bloody hell!

Picturesinthefirelight · 03/08/2013 15:05

Blimey my two get cereal or toast for breakfast and that's it.

Dd won't be boarding but at the school she's going to (she spent a week at their summer school last week they had a choice of cereal, toast, eggs, sausages & beans.

DumSpiroSpero · 03/08/2013 15:07

FGS - the OP doesn't need an excuse to do what she thinks is best for her child - boarding schools are hardly the dens of corporal punishment and buggery they used to be.

The one DH used to work at was fabulous, and there was plenty of opportunity for the kids to see their families.

It's not what I'd choose for DD, who'd hate it, but after an overdose of Enid Blyton I was begging my parents to send me to boarding school by the age of 8! They didn't, and I'm sure it wouldn't have lived up to my storybook expectations but that's obviously not the case for OP and her DD who are perfectly entitled to choose their own path

Primadonnagirl · 03/08/2013 15:13

I think you are over reacting based on just one days offerings. Veggie or not there's always going to be some days that she doesn't much fancy what's on offer..when you've revealed the other options she was hardly going to starve. Beans can be just as bad if packed with sugar and salt. I really think you are worrying over nothing in the grand scheme of BS potential problems!

thebody · 03/08/2013 15:14

Gosh my teens go to the local comp and the menu range is like a Jamie Oliver recipe book. fabulously tasty and all home cooked and healthy.

money for old rope these boarding schools then.😄

Picturesinthefirelight · 03/08/2013 15:15

I would never ever have thought I would contemplate boarding school for my dd but I'm currently feeling bad that we can't afford for her to board at a specialist school where several children board on full scholarships (she has bursary not scholarship so boarding not covered)

livinginwonderland · 03/08/2013 15:35

I went to boarding school and they will provide veggie sausages/bacon for kids once term starts. I was vegetarian for a couple of years and all you had to do was ask for vegetarian sausages and they'd get you some - they just didn't keep it out front because they didn't want other (meat eaters) people to take them!

sweetestcup · 03/08/2013 15:36

Still think you are complaining over nothing OP if there was cereal available. But you wont have the same level of control that you would have if she was at home. Never understood the point of boarding schools either, I would miss my kids too much but each to their own, if I had £10,000 it would be a private school I would pick.

slapandpickle · 03/08/2013 15:42

Beans would be better for every day, it's important for her to get her protein somewhere. however I have been known to feast on a tin of value spaghetti with croissants dipped in, the combo is DELICIOUS and I suggest everyone tries it.

frogspoon · 03/08/2013 16:20

Most decent boarding schools have a full varied range of food and alternate through popular choices. So maybe spaghetti hoops today, but perhaps veggie sausages yesterday and scrambled eggs tomorrow?
Also as it was just a taster day, there will be fewer students in school, therefore probably a smaller selection that average was provided. If you are still worried, contact the school and ask for a breakfast menu.

I'm going to be teaching in a boarding school in September, if you are interested, this is a selection of what the school is offering:

Every day: Cereals inc porridge, bread, toast and preserves, coffee, tea and juices, yoghurt and fruit
2 days a week: continental breakfast including pastries, cheeses and meats
Hot foods available on the remaining 4 days (not everything every day) include sausages, bacon, black pudding, eggs, french toast, beans, spaghetti hoops, hash browns and bubble and squeak.
On Sundays they have a brunch including full English, as well as weekly options such as omelettes, chocolate croissants, homemade sausage rolls, smoked haddock, baked brie wedges, chicken wings and paninis.

(unfortunately I will not be a live-in staff, so I will not get to sample this delicious food!)

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