To think that 'Big Head' is a horrible way to refer to a child?

[PinkSippyCup]

Dd is 8mo and my pfb, so am willing to accept I may be being a little but precious.

SIL has recently decided that 'Big Head' is an acceptable nick-name to call DD. Every time she sees her it's "hey Big Head!"

Now aibu to think this is horrible and DD will grow up thinking it's true?

I'm thinking I'll either start calling SIL the same name or suggesting that we save the nick-name Big Head for when she has children

So AIBU?

[maras2]

Silly cow and very rude too.Tell her to call your baby by their propper name.That has to be the nastiest nickname to inflict on a child.

[imnotmymum]

Big Head seriously ?? That is awful just tell her and you not being uptight just the most ridiculous name to call a baby

[aldiwhore]

To say it once may be forgiven, my nephew has a big head (98th centile, body much lower) and my sister and I have commented on it, but gently, without cruelty.

I'd never NAME the child that way.

Just tell her to stop, and if she doesn't start calling her Fat Arse or something so she understand how annoying it is.

[Elquota]

YANBU. Not acceptable at all. Just say "Would you mind not calling her that please?" She'll probably protest but hopefully still get the message.

[FannyFifer]

I would prob be real passive aggressive and say to the baby something like, "now big head, what's that silly fat arse saying now, oh yes look at her big fat arse, isn't she a silly billy" .

[pianodoodle]

It's not exactly original or unique either. I mean, they nearly all look like "big heads" at that age lol

Mind you, DH calls DD "fat pants" which is the same thing.

For some reason it seems more acceptable when it's the parent doing it though.

[Beeyump]

I take it she's doing it in an affectionate, rather than horrible way though. I'd be devastated if I was stopped from seeing my niece and nephew because of a silly remark I wasn't aware was causing offence.

[carolthesecretary]

What?! Rude cow. In what way does she think that's okay?

I would start calling her big arse if she did that to a child of mine... Oh, and be too busy to see her.

[PinkSippyCup]

22, old enough to know better IMO, but likes to play 'the baby'.

Won't make it a big deal, I'll just say something about it being horrible next time she says it.

I loathe any kind of confrontation, but know I need to stand up for DD.

[Salmotrutta]

How old is she?

If she's not normally insensitive or nasty could you have a quiet chat away from prying ILs ears?

[PinkSippyCup]

Thanks for replies.

Yes I will tell her to stop, but just know in laws will all pile in, stand-up for SIL and use this as another example of how up-tight I am.

SIL isn't generally nasty. I think it's more wanted to have a 'special name' that she calls DD. This is the second NN, the last one was calling her by the first letter of her name. That used to piss me off as well, but at least it wasn't horrible.

Gah. You spend months picking out the perfect name for your DC, why can't people just use it!

[jemstipp]

Haha Funghoul it's a SIL this time ;-)

[Funghoul]

Oh god I'm a mil basher...
Hi jem

[Chivetalking]

Unkind and unnecessary. "D"B nicknamed DC1 something faintly derogatory as a baby and it always made me when he said it. He'd have been the first to whinge if I'd done something similar with his kids when they arrived .

YANBU

[jemstipp]

I used to call mine "seal pup" and "chubber" because she was 10lbs 14oz when she was born, she grew into it though (now 16months and tall for her age, plus she was my child so that's ok, someone else doing it, not so much. Would have cracked me up.

[Salmotrutta]

Yes, I think there is insecurity involved.

Maybe a mechanism to deflect attention/ criticism from themselves.

Or then again, maybe just plain lack of emotional intelligence combined with a mean spirit.

[LookingForwardToMarch]

I call mine stinky bum

But then she is only 4 months old

And it's generally around changing time that I call her it

[Cheeseatmidnight]

Call her big gob next time she says it

[jemstipp]

They are the ones who normally have some insecurity am I right Salmotrutta? She was prob the bully at school when she was younger, just don't let her start on your baby.

[Beeyump]

What's wrong with having a big head?? Mine's massive...all those brains

[Passmethecrisps]

Yep. Just tell her to stop. My sister did this when a relative kept calling her baby "big pudding". Sounded cutesy but she had her reasons for not liking it. Big head is just horrid

[Salmotrutta]

And Worra is right.

Just say "Is that supposed to be funny? Because its not, it's just offensive"

[Salmotrutta]

Ah, I see jem!

Anyway OP - people like your SIL are usually the type who think its funny to make jokes about others then accuse those others of "having no sense of humour" when they get upset.

Come across a lot of those in my time, oh yes.

Can't stand that type of "humour".

[jemstipp]

Hi to Funghoul again! Yeah totally agree with Worraliberty, stop it straight away.

[xylem8]

It did make me LOL, but I wouldn't like it if it were my baby.Just call her Big Arse!