To let baby watch tv?!

[Wishfulmakeupping]

My dd is 5 months.
We do stuff everyday babygroups/meeting friends/family/shopping trips in morning and go for a walk in afternoons as well as playing on play mat for couple hours.
But I do let her watch baby tv for about an hour-1.5 in morning while I'm getting ready sorting out bag etc and and another 30min to an hour at teatime.
Is this so wrong? People have said its too much tv and she shouldn't be watching any.

[yakisoba]

TreeLuLa I don't want to answer for Thumbwitch but suspect she meant the link I referred to halfway down page 3. Apologies if that's incorrect! It's an interesting watch.....

[Thumbwitch]

I certainly did mean that one, yakisoba. :)
//youtu.be/v2SdEpHjrjw relinking for ease.

[1Veryhungrycaterpillar]

Cant she sit in a chair/swing and watch you? Plenty of time for watching tv when she's older

[TreeLuLa]

Thanks both. I've watched it and agree, it is very interesting.

No evidence (yet) but I also wonder whether too much TV when young can be linked to ASD type issues.

I won't be surprised if screen time and ASD in some children is shown to be linked at some point soon.

[Xmasbaby11]

That seems really early to me and quite a long time. I don't think it encourages good habits.

Recommended advice is no TV until the age of 2.

[SonShines]

The TED talk is excellent.

Babies just don't need TV. They do not need to be entertained 24hrs a day . There is such a thing as too much stimulation. If you need to get stuff done, do it whilst they sleep. If they don't sleep (or not for long enough) wear them in a sling, if they're grouchy lie them in the cot with some soothing music, if you have older siblings to keep busy as well, encourage them to 'read' to baby. Why is the default solution to all these problems put the Tv on?! It's a quick fix that will ultimately course more problems later...

[Judyandherdreamofhorses]

My NSB, who is 1 next week, has just come to find me and signed 'More Baby' (Jake). Nothing else has motivated him to make a two word sentence yet. PFB didn't even see any TV until I was pregnant with this one and desperate for respite (she was almost 3). Now she watches quite a lot (iplayer, mostly octonauts), probably half an hour in total or a bit more. So DS watches too.

Will watch the TED lecture though and make myself feel bad!

[Wishfulmakeupping]

Watched the ted video and do feel bad hadn't realised the impact of the type of TV watched. I think I feel like I constantly need to entertain my dd like I've said she's mainly out or we're doing something playing on mat/singing/reading so any time I needed to do something I was putting her in front of baby tv for a few mins I will try just putting her in chair without TV

[Lottapianos]

That TED talk is great, he explains it brilliantly, especially the difference in the content of TV between the 70s and now.

[pigletmania]

Sonshines you pick your battles, if your baby is crying 9-9 you are sleep deprived, and baby cannot be soothed a little tv will not hurt fgs! Ido those things for my ds who is not fussed about tv but for dd (asd) it did not wrk, the soothing strainers of Mick Mouse used to calm her. Now at 6 she hardly watches any tv, preferring to make stuff or play in the garden.

[pigletmania]

I was reading a story about a 9-10 month with cancer and downs syndrome. She could only be soothed by watching Micky Mouse,, and it used to make her smile, so watched a lot of it when she was really ill. Would you judge!

[working9while5]

I think the more crucial thing here is that children do not need you to be perfect and make near perfect decisions and offer near perfect input all the time.

Most people put on the television for their children because they need a break. I totally agree that no baby needs that much stimulation but to be honest, I think we underestimate typical children's ability to self-select what's best for them to attend to in the environment.

A 5 month old isn't going to have the attention span to attend to 90 minutes of television, whether broken up or not. So while "watching television", they will also be looking at the lights, tracking you moving across the room, playing with their fingers, looking at the carpet etc. They are not going to be glued to the television. I've seen family members who have those Baby Einstein things etc and their babies don't sit transfixed. They tune in and tune out of that stimulus as they do with everything else.

I think to be honest it's a bigger issue when they're older and it can become addictive. When I was unwell with depression my 3 year old son got a lot more television than I would have chosen in my right state of mind and I could see the hook it had on him, even though he was doing other things: having time with me colouring/baking/going out/playing duplo/going out on his bikes. Yet I'm not going to beat myself up about having been where I was - I didn't choose it and when I was well we took steps to change it.

Everything in life is about balance. You're going to do certain things as a parent out of a need for your own space and that's not a sin or a travesty because actually self-care is a crucial factor in mental well-being and allowing you to be present and fully attuned the rest of the day. Kids used to be allowed wail in a playpen for hours, we don't do that now. At one point in history babies were put up on pegs! Every generation will have its "not great but not abusive" type of non-human "babysitter".

One of the hardest things about being a mother these days is the endless and relentless critical analysis of every single decision. This isn't mentally healthy and is its own suffering and detraction from being the mother you want to be. I wonder do people hear themselves when they start the Monty Python Yorkshiremen sketch: "well I had 7 under 5 and no husband and no money and severe depression and cancer and a disability and I managed to be a better mother than you by never putting on half an hour of television". Bully for you, lovies. Yours is the harder path, I see.. but my life is happening to me as Larkin said.
We're not mothers in Auschwitz or in the dumps of Brazil, it's true.. but that doesn't mean that we have to be self-flagellating every time we make a decision that wouldn't be made by The Perfect Mother. It's only a bit of television in a warm and loving stimulating environment with plenty of cuddles, kisses, naps and good food and an interested and loving mother. Honestly. It isn't heroin in the baby bottle.

[Pobblewhohasnotoes]

Well said.

[Mycatistoosexy]

Well done working good points well made

[Thumbwitch]

[GobbySadcase]

My kids had ASD from birth. No amount of TV or not would have made a difference and I find it offensive that people seek to blame parenting. Genetic causes are frequent, as in our case.

[lola88]

letting them watch Jeremy Kyle is bad letting them watch some cartoons is fine, I watched lots of tv and it didn't do me any harm

[hobnobsaremyfavourite]

ASD linked to watching tv dear God I've heard it all now.

[GobbySadcase]

I know. "My kid's perfect because I'm a perfect parent. Those kids have ASD therefore the parents did something wrong".

Lovely, that.

[frissonpink]

Hmm. I think my 8 month old watches about the same, feeling guilty now!

Just a question though..

She will happily sit and play on her playmat though, and play with her toys.

Is is so wrong for the TV to me on for me to watch? Or are those anti TV people saying the tV should never go on in the house at all whilst a baby is awake?

Because if the TV isn't on at all, I'm sorry, I don't have the money to be out of the house all day! We go out for a walk in the pram most days. Tesco food shop one day a week. One baby class a week (that's honestly all we can afford)

People seem to forget that it costs money to go out!

Anyway. I grew up watching TV and have zillions of qualifications, so can't say it did me any harm ;) I do talk to my DD all day. I think that's the most important part.

Surely the anti tv officials mean, don't just leave your baby in front of the TV with nothing else going on?

[Thumbwitch]

I think it's a bit of a jump to go from too much TV at a young age possibly contributing to ADD, to it possibly being linked to ASD. The first is, I think, quite possible - the latter, not so.
(and I wish that would format properly but it won't so you'll just have to pretend the middle letter is bold in each)

[pigletmania]

Yes gobby my dd presented with Asd from birth how do you explain that! Judgy people much

[pigletmania]

Sorry gobby I wasn't aiming at you but in agreement with you. Asd has nothing to do with blooming screen time and all to do with generic physical factors

[Harryhairypig]

Once again thankful mine were babies before this 'they must not watch any tv for years' research came out so happily plonked mine in front of baby Einstein to get a break with no guilt when necessary for my sanity. And no long term harm. Workings post is wonderful. Just fib if anyone brings it up OP so you can't be judged.

[5madthings]

If you read the thread she says that 1hr and a half is made up of 20mins here and there as she is doing stuff. Is 20mins whilst she has a shower and gets herself sorted, maybe ten mins whilst she is tidying etc then another bit whilst getting stuff ready to go out..

We didn't have a TV whilst ds1 was little, in fact both he and ds2 hardly watched TV at all, but ds4 certainly watched some as a baby and do did dd (no5). I can't remember with ds3 but no doubt he watched a bit with his siblings.

Its a balance and as long as she talks to and interacts with thge baby etc its fine. If you never talk to them/rarely interact with them then problems can follow.

As Cailin says its the environment as a whole not just one bit of it.