or is DH

[Wishihadabs]

Maybe should have posted in relationships anyway here goes. I regularly WOTH on Thursdays. DH works from home and does school runs. A group of his mate's go out every month ona Thurday night . Only thing is they meet at 530 pm so I am rarely back from work. I try to enable DH to attend these sessions as often as possible. This week I organised a babysitter (just because I had her number on my phone) which he was happy to pay for so he could go. She is 18 and doing her A-levels. Unfortunately she forgot tonight. DH is now suggesting leaving the dcs (who need feeding) with either the builder ( who hasent yet left) or the 12 year old across the street ! it's a real pity the original babysitter forgot , but these things happen, she is probably a bit sttressed out about her exams. AIBU to think hello should suck it up instead of implementing these crackpot schemes for our dcs on a school night. Or am I overreacting ? It is v. frustrating as I have finished work but was at meeting this pm so on my way home, but won't be there til at leas t730 ( which IMO is a far more sensible time to go out anyway) and I am wondering what on earth I am going to come home to.

[Wishihadabs]

I can completely relate to the bafflement around the 530 meet up. Apparently they start to peel off from 8pm. Personally I think it's an avoidance of the whitching hour at home. Then they go back to the dinner their good little wives have cooked (not career bitches like me). Personally I don't know what he sees in them and their wives are with out exception boooring. However as I say it's only once a month, so I live with it. Except if he decides to leave our children with other children or random strangers.

[StuntGirl]

Absolutely not sure why he has to go at 5.30 when the logistics do not allow that. Seriously, he needs to suck it up, wait for you to come home later and go out then. It won't kill him.

[niceguy2]

Your DH is an idiot. As others have said, it's not the end of the world to meet up with his mates a bit later.

Tell him he needs to man the fuck up.

[doubleshotespresso]

Really baffled as to why DH could not just wait for your return and meet his friends later...

His suggestions are ridiculous, calling you to make the decision for him is beyond the pale, I would have a few serious questions for him following an episode like this in your shoes OP.

[AnyFucker]

he must have really needed that extra couple of pints

[Wishihadabs]

Dc are 9 &6

[Wishihadabs]

No this is not normal for him.FWIW if he wants to pay a babysitter (trusted and known to the dcs) so he can go out when I'm not there, I have no problem with it. As I said it's only once a month the dcs like our regular babysitter. So I think it's fine.

However I totally not ok with him leaving them with uncle Tom Codly and all so he can go out with his mates.

In the end he went and collected our babysitter so they were with a familiar person. I think I made my feelings very clear.

[livingdownunder]

how old are the dcs? I'm very confused as to his suggestions to leave with the builder or a 12yr old. Does he normally come up with these odd ideas?
YANBU

[PurpleSwift]

Can't he just go at 7.30 instead?

[LemonPeculiarJones]

YANBU. He is. Whats wrong with him? Potentially endangering his kids for a night out?

And why is he so desperate about being there so early?

[WilsonFrickett]

We've got (very lovely) builders in at the minute, I would love to see their faces if I suggested a spot of babysitting.

This is a bonkers situation OP. His family circumstances don't allow him to meet people at 530. I go out a lot, but only after DP gets home, and I would never ask him to come home 'early' unless it was work related or a special thing like a concert, for example, where there's a definite 'start'.

[rambososcar]

Any man who suggested leaving my children in the care of either a builder or a 12 year old would be being made to consider whether or not he wanted to remain in the family home. Any man who left my children with the builder or a 12 year old would no longer have a family home to worry about.

[Laquitar]

Even if you trust the builder why should he (the builder) be happy to look after the children when their father is not??

This is not an emergency or a work issue. It is about going for a drink. He goes later fgs.

[StuntGirl]

xpost AF

[StuntGirl]

Is he normally so stupid?

[AnyFucker]

Is your h usually such a fucking Nob ?

[sooperdooper]

Why can't he meet them at 7.30? Surely better to arrive late than not at all

[MammaTJ]

Why doesn't he just go and grab some random stranger off the street to babysit? After all, he is happy to leave them with a random builder. I'm sure if he asks their name before leaving them, it will be fine.

I can't believe he suggested the builder.

[BackforGood]

Is there a reason he can't just join up with his mates later in the evening ?

[Shutupanddrive]

Of course he is BU, and selfish and possibly stupid (sorry)
He needs to grow up

[CloudsAndTrees]

Do you know the builder other than professionally?

I had workmen in recently, one of them overheard me telling my 12 yo that he had to come out with me to pick up other dc when he usually waits at home for the 20 minutes it takes. They later thanked me for doing this because they find it awkward when they have to tell people that they can't be in the house alone with children so could they please not leave their children at home.

Your DH IBU.

[verytellytubby]

I actually laughed out loud at leaving with the builder. Jesus.

[Wishihadabs]

I wish I knew Horry

[Wishihadabs]

He most definitely will be organising the babysitter in the future. I have made sure they have each other's numbers. No we don't know the builder all that well !