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AIBU?

To be totally horrified that women on a parenting website are giving advice to a violent rapist on how to see his child?

204 replies

Heleneahandcart1 · 08/05/2013 12:23

I have no words, I am beyond disgusted

www.netmums.com/coffeehouse/advice-support-40/serious-stuff-43/929210-just-out-prison-want-see-my-daughter.html

OP posts:
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edam · 10/05/2013 23:41


Never fails to amaze me how dangerous apparently well-meaning people can be...

If this had happened on MN, HQ would have stepped in, I'm sure. Netmums is incredibly irresponsible.
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LayMizzRarb · 10/05/2013 23:36

When he posted this, my blood ran cold. I'm not a member of that site, but please someone tell me that he has been banned and all his posts removed? So the site that bans you for saying 'fuck' allows a so-called rapist to write this? ( and this text was visible to anyone on the Internet for quite a while) :


I'm saying this for no other reason, other than I think that this is the right thing to do. Be aware that if you do want to take this all the way to court, that things are only going to get a lot lot worst for you. For a start you will have to see the guy again. For another, you are going to have to face a barrister (probably qc) who is going to rip you to shreds. For a start he is going to have to point out that the first thing that you did was come onto an internet website asking for advise before reporting it, and for another they are going to go through all your previous sexual history trying to make you out to be a complete slut. On top of that they will make an issue of you being drunk and taking a man home with you... Basically they are going to make out you are at fault.

To top is all off, you are going to have this humiliation in front of this guy. You are going to have it in front of his friends and family, and also most likely your own family. If you think now is bad, then you need to appreciate what it will be like.

Like I said. I am not trying to upset you with that. But it only fair that someone is going to tell you what is really going to happen.

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Smellslikecatspee · 10/05/2013 23:33

I think they have now, very late but. .

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Boomba · 10/05/2013 20:13

jupiter I don't think I would expect his attitude to be any different. He is a violent rapist after all. I agree with everyone else though; the really dangerous thing is all the silly women reinforcing his views and opinions. More than that, Netmums endorsing them by not deleting and blocking him, quicker

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TantrumsAndBalloons · 10/05/2013 11:43

The HV recommended it to my sister in law.
I dont know why they are pushing this site, it is not a good place to be.

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InLoveWithDavidTennant · 10/05/2013 11:41

Shock holy crap!

wtf are they thinking over there?

the more i hear about that site... the more disturbed i feel about it

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SchroSawMargeryDaw · 10/05/2013 11:28

No Jupiter, I was recommended it for weaning advice and other such things.

I am very glad I was already a member here instead!

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BabyMakesTheBoobiesGoLeaky · 10/05/2013 11:27

He's scum,pure and simple.

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MsJupiterJones · 10/05/2013 11:14

Boomba that is just appalling.

Sorry you had to go through that in the first place but to have your word doubted by someone like that must be a horrible feeling.

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MsJupiterJones · 10/05/2013 11:08

The only reason I can think that HVs recommend it is for the Local sites. But it really is extraordinary how endorsed it is. I received an email from the NHS this morning with a link to the 'health chat' page of NM too, which afaics is full of nonsense. Nothing as insidious as the stuff on this thread but still... why?

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SchroSawMargeryDaw · 10/05/2013 10:29

Omg, what a disgusting excuse for a person.

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KoreRenati · 10/05/2013 08:49

Eurgh, he's vile!

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Boomba · 10/05/2013 08:17

Urgh...the disgusting shit PMd me!

I posted on Hannqhs thread, to say
1 that I had been raped, didn't report it...regretted it. To wish her strength

And

  1. To tell Sam, that rapists were unhwlpful/ unwelcome


His PM, said he doesn't want to argue with me on the main forum, but that it obvious I haven't been raped. That I am not helping 'the poor girl's and I should think more about the impact my actions will have, before posting!!
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Binkyridesagain · 10/05/2013 07:29

The Mods have edited the thread, it looks like Sams posts have been removed, letshope they have banned him as well, doubt it though.

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SchroSawMargeryDaw · 10/05/2013 07:20

We need to stop health professionals recommending that website to new Mothers and women who may be vulnerable.

My GP made a comment and told me to get off this site when I told her I went on it (full of loons apparently) but my HV etc is quite happy to recommend NMs. Angry

Dear God that website is awful, the mods should be ashamed of themselves.

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Boomba · 10/05/2013 06:57

I've reported him FFS. why don't they ban him?!

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TantrumsAndBalloons · 10/05/2013 05:53

Oh lovely.

A rapist advising a woman who has been raped how terrible it will be for her if she goes to court.

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Heleneahandcart1 · 10/05/2013 03:00

Now hes on another thread trying to put off a woman who is clearly in distress. What a piece of shit.

www.netmums.com/coffeehouse/advice-support-40/serious-stuff-43/928723-so-confused-need-shoulder-2.html

OP posts:
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sweetestcup · 09/05/2013 21:38

I have never wanted to join, I really dont think my eyes could take all the sparkle and glittery tickery things plus all the quoting...its a mess to read.

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crazynanna · 09/05/2013 21:34

Oh sorry..wrong end of the stick Blush

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Boomba · 09/05/2013 20:35

no crazynana that was on here Blush

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crazynanna · 09/05/2013 20:33

Don't worry Boomba...NaziMods always get rid of the more reasonable poster. I was banned for sooo much less. Unless you are NeoNaziMum on there..you just don't fit the Mod's criteria.

IRCL I am the Wolfie Shiney hater if that's any help Smile

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Boomba · 09/05/2013 20:19

A personal attack!!

Im hugely misunderstood Grin

No, I honestly never intended any 'attack'...there was a thread where OP was moaning about some neighbour with a superiority complex; her life was a charade. follows long thread, about how awful people like that are, they get their comeuppance etc. People suspected the awful person was a MNer

i posted something like 'OMG, is it XXX?!...and got banned. For naming the name, i suppose.

Daft thing is, all my other posts on the thread were in defence of the 'awful neighbour' (possibly XXX)...in that, why not just move on, stop obssessing/you lot are as bad, wishing misfortune on her Confused

i nice really, honest officer!

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LadyBeagleEyes · 09/05/2013 19:28

You were banned from MN Boomba?
What did you do?

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everlong · 09/05/2013 19:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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