AIBU?
squoosh · 07/05/2013 15:51
Noisy eating makes me fizz with rage. Why did no one ever teach these savages table manners?
These chompers are always the sort to then use their paper napkin as a hankie and have a good post-scoff root around in their nostrils and then examine said napkin thoroughly.
smoothieooo · 07/05/2013 16:04
I had to endure a 30 minute train journey the other day with a woman eating an orange in the most lip-smackingly, slurpy manner. It was hideous and no amount of glaring over my paper decreased the decibel level obviously I'm too much of a wuss to actually say anything
ladyjadie · 07/05/2013 17:26
Ugh ugh UGH.. I HATE it!
My ex did it too, and shovelled food into his gob so no wonder!
I said something when the rose tinted earplugs fell out a couple of times, but he still did it! After a year he just got looks, and would say I was controlling. Well IF YOU JUST ATE WITH YOUR FUCKING MOUTH SHUT.
Sigh...
Talismanic I actually cringed reading your impression! 
Donnadoon · 07/05/2013 17:32
Erm I have to admit ... But I am a noisy eater... I can't help it really I can't
I don't do the napkin thing as mentioned up thread
I just forget myself and eat " like a cement mixer" the family say
If its any consolation I don't eat out in public, very rarely anyway
pictish · 07/05/2013 17:38
Not the same...but sort of...
Went to a gig last night, and in my usual fashion stayed to the edge at the side so I could see. Three young lassies behind me...maybe 17/18? One was pressed right into my back and sang along utterly tunlessly at top volume throughout.
She was really gripping my shit and distracting me from the actual singer. I tried to tell myself not to be such a miserable hag, and that it's ok to sing at a gig....but honestly...they're not really a sing along sort of band...no one else was singing...we were all there to listen.
Elbowed her in the tit a couple of times but she never noticed.
pictish · 07/05/2013 17:43
My dad grumbles and grizzles like a grizzly bear when he eats. GRRRRR!! Grrrrrr...grrrr.....GRR! Homnomnomnom..grrrr...nomnomnom...
It's embarrassing. People stare, and none of us can look one another in the eye, for fear of laughter.
He has no idea he's doing it.
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