to wonder how with all the laws now a days there is still no law for what age a child can be left at home?

[Howsaboutthat]

You may be sensible and mature and just limit yourself to a glass of wine, but law states you cannot buy a drink until you are 18.

You may be sensible and mature and use precautions, but law states you cannot have sex until you are 16.

You may be able to swim 5,000 metres but you can't go in a pool at 7 without an adult, you may sink like a lead balloon but as long as you have had your 8 birthday you can go swimming on your own.

11 year olds are not allowed to leave a holiday care club unless they are signed out by an adult, but there is no law stopping that same 11 year old not being put in holiday care club and being left at home alone.

AIBU to think that some of the age laws are farcical (I haven't listed all the ones I disagree with here), but to have them while there is no law as to what age a child can be left at home (because parents are deemed in this one and only situation capable of knowing their own child) seems mad?

[cory]

The laws or (more often) policies you cite- selling alcohol, not letting a child leave a holiday club- is there to protect other people (employees/landlords/cinemas) as much as anything.

As parents we know our children and can make a judgment call about whether a glass of wine to a 15yo at dinner is likely to cause any problems or if our 10yo is responsible enough to get himself home in the evening; it would be most unfair to expect the same from the landlord of the local or the manager of the sports centre.

Swimming pool policies vary from place to place, but are no doubt there to protect the business from the negative publicity that would follow an accident. (There are no rules about when you can let your child swim in a river).

Again, the laws about the age of consent are not primarily there to make sure parents stop their teens from having sex, but so that older people contemplating sex with a young teen may know where they stand (and when they are acting inappopriately).

[VelvetSpoon]

As has been said, there are too many variables to legislate for this, all children are different.

I think it is good that this is left to the discretion of parents. My DC have spent time alone at home from the age of 9 or 10, which was fine for us. I know other people whose DC are in their teens and have never been left at home, because either the parent or the child (or both) are not comfortable with this. There's no right or wrong.

[Mytholmroyd]

It is legal for a 14 year old to drink beer, cider and wine when eating in a restaurant - so technically you can take them out for a pint. It is very difficult however as few staff seem to know the law - they think their establishments policy IS the law.

Lost count of the number of times I have had to point put that whilst a waitress might not be able to tell whether my over-21 DDs are 18/21/25 (or whatever age the policy states) there is no doubt that they are over 13!

I never return to a restaurant that lies and says they are just following the law and they didnt make it when they clearly have! Just take responsibility for your company policy and stop hiding behind the 'law'. And yes, I'm looking at you splash landings!!!

[IneedAsockamnesty]

But any venue is perfectly entitled to set their own policy regarding drinking as long as that policy does not break the law.

So if you are out and about it does not matter if you wish to give your child booze because its legal to do so of the Venue does not wish to allow it.

[b4bunnies]

there should be laws about the age at which children are allowed to babysit for other children. for example, all babysitters to be over 21.

[5318008]

babysitters to be over 21? really? what about a parent aged under 21? I would be ever so interested in your solution to this, eye thenk yew

[seeker]

Babysitters over 21? Why, ffs!

[IneedAsockamnesty]

There are already laws relating to the age of a baby sitter.

If you leave your child in the care of a under 16 and anything goes wrong you can be taken to court for neglect.

[Startail]

Because if there was a law stating an age that DCs could be left alone, it would, in this cotton wool age have to be set ridiculously high, and 1000 of women would have to give up work.

Or the government would have to face providing proper before and after school care. This is not going to happen.

[seeker]

"If you leave your child in the care of a under 16 and anything goes wrong you can be taken to court for neglect."

Same applies to children being left on their own.

[IneedAsockamnesty]

Well pointed out seeker I temp forgot that bit.

[exoticfruits]

Good grief- babysitters have to be over 21yrs!! Your DCs teacher is quite likely to be 21yrs- medical staff will be that age etc. you can be married with your own DC at 16 yrs. It is a mad world if someone can be in the forces in Afghanistan but they can't be watching TV with a toddler tucked up in bed and the parent at the end if a mobile phone!
It was my first way to earn money as a teenager.
Of course you are responsible for your DC if you are not there- that is what parents do.
I would hate legislation on it if it stops parents risk assessing for themselves - they have already lost the ability if they think a babysitter has to be over 21yrs!

[AnneElliott]

It's actually 16 to drink beer, wine or cider in a restaurant with a meal. I think it was 14 in the old 1974 Licensing Act but in the 2003 Act it is 16. A lot of places don't allow it though as they have concerns about proving the age of the person.

[Abra1d]

Oh let's not involve the State in yet another area of our private family lives. I don't need Nanny to tell me how to run my life.

[MoreBeta]

seeker - you hit the nail on the head there and is the bit of the arbitrary way that law is applied that bothers me:

""If you leave your child in the care of a under 16 and anything goes wrong you can be taken to court for neglect."

Same applies to children being left on their own."

I dont care what anyone says. If your child comes to harm and someone in authority (ie a police officer or social worker) takes it into their head to make an issue of it than you have not got a leg to stand on. Imagine standing in some court room somewhere trying to explain why you left your otherwise sensible child on their own like millions of other parents do when they suddenly your child inexplicably went and di something silly as children are prone to do and they came to harm.

The law will have none of it. Your parental judgement will not matter a jot. The child came to harm and the law will come down on you like a ton of bricks. The state will prosecute you and there are police officers and social workers out there always looking for a nice easy prosecution to make their numbers look good.

As a retired police officer on a blog points out - police officers always like prosecuting nice reasonable middle class people because they cooperate, they dont punch you in the face and they think that by 'being reasonable' the police will also be reasonable. They won't and neither will social services. They will write down everything you say as you witter on in a state of panic and then write up a charge sheet.

I wont be leaving my children on their own any time soon.

[seeker]

"The law will have none of it. Your parental judgement will not matter a jot. The child came to harm and the law will come down on you like a ton of bricks. The state will prosecute you and there are police officers and social workers out there always looking for a nice easy prosecution to make their numbers look good.

As a retired police officer on a blog points out - police officers always like prosecuting nice reasonable middle class people because they cooperate, they dont punch you in the face and they think that by 'being reasonable' the police will also be reasonable. They won't and neither will social services. They will write down everything you say as you witter on in a state of panic and then write up a charge sheet."

Yep. That's why the courts and prisons are full of nice, reasonable middle class people

[sashh]

With leaving a child alone there are two many variables.

You can be reasonably sure a 16 year old's body is mature enough to carry a pregnancy without harm, and that at 16 they can say 'no' and understand what sex is.

How do you define 'home alone' for a start. A big old Victorian house with 20 used as a sole residence, a child could be quite far away/out of sight and sound of any adults.

If the same house is converted into flats does popping next door mean you have left your child alone even though they are in the next room?

Leaving a child in the house when you hang out washing - is that leaving a child alone?

What if you are on a farm, you are still on your land but in a field 1 mile away.

And that's just the housing, children vary, some are sensible, others not so much.

I think a rule of thumb is that if they are old enough and sensible enough to get themselves to and from school either walking of on public transport then they can be left while you pop to the shops.

[IneedAsockamnesty]

Morebeta,

What a lot of bollocks.

You are more likely to end up subject to a ss investigation if you are poor,don't live in a decent area and are not naice and middle class.

That's not because people who are poor and don't live in nice areas abuse children more its because they are more likely to come to the attention of the services.


Naice middle class people can get away with leaving 3 year olds home alone dressing there kids shoddily, and low to medium level neglect usually without anybody jumping all over them because they tend not to be on the radar and people tend to report them less due to inbuilt bias.

If a young mum living on a shitty housing estate on benefits did exactly the same things she would be subject to investigation and involvement and it would be even worse if she just so happened to have minor PND or learning issues or was under 20.

[seeker]

As I said, you can"t move for Volvos and all terrain push chairs in the Magistrate's Court car park......

[IneedAsockamnesty]

I know seeker but you said it in such a polite way

[seeker]

You're right- I was too subtle. He probably thought I was agreeing with him.


Bollocks is much better.

[exoticfruits]

You would get the most ridiculous situations if babysitters had to be older. It would mean that I would have an 18yr old DS at home and couldn't leave him with his brothers of 10yrs and 8yrs.
Once your own DC gets to about 15yrs you can't get them a babysitter-it is way too embarrassing for them.

[marriedtoagoodun]

Just thought I would clarify a point; you cannot be sent to war at 16 if you are a member of the armed forces. You cannot be sent to an 'operational theatre' until you are 18 - still very young but not 16.

[exoticfruits]

No-but you can go away from home. I think the army would laugh at the fact that a 16 yr old couldn't cope with a toddler in bed and a parent at the end of a phone.

[niceguy2]

Some of the age laws are stupid but as others have said, a lot of the examples in OP's original post are not laws.

Personally i like the idea that I as a parent can use my own judgement and in general I don't want a nanny state telling me that I cannot leave my perfectly sensible 14yr old child at home because some other (crap) parent hasn't been able to bring their child up with an ounce of common sense.