To charge my employer for these childcare costs?

[DixieD]

I started a PT job about 6 months ago. It was always clear I was looking for PT as I had young kids. I work half seven to four to get home in the evenings to let the childminder go. This has been the arrangement since the beginning and everyone is happy with it.
DH works long hours, while I get home for 5 he is rarely home before 8. This is the nature of his job, it can't be helped. There have been a couple of occasions due to Board meetings that I have had to work later and DH has stepped in those evenings. Otherwise if I need to work later I've brought the laptop home and worked after the kids go to bed.
Anyway my boss needs me to go to the Milan office for a day. He wants me there for a full day so I need to go for two nights. I am happy to go. However there is no way DH can finish early both nights, so childminder will be minding the kids for extra hours one evening. Obviously I will have to pay her for this.
My question is would IBU to charge this as an expense of travelling? It is the fact I am abroad for two nights that I am incurring it. I think I've a case. DH thinks it cheeky. What do you think? AIBU?

[scottishmummy]

Being a mother of small children isnt necessarily mitigating factor
She knew she had small children when she took job,big bad work didn't compel her
I'd be more inclined to recommend look at t&c re claiming allowances when away

[TheFallenMadonna]

I'm just not sure why it "can't be helped" that your DH finishes late every night, at no extra cost to his employer. But if you have to work longer hours, your employer has to pick up the cost.

That is what seems unfair.

Unless your DH works set hours by contract?

[ShellyBoobs]

Why isn't the organisation being cheeky expecting a mother of small children to spend two nights away from home...

What about a father of small children?

Some people's belief (not OP's) that childcare is only the mother's (and employer's) responsibility does no favour's at all for women in the workplace.

[ImperialBlether]

Mother or father, just that in this case it's the mother.

The OP took on the part time job because she wanted more free time in the week to care for her children. The company knows this. They are wanting her to be away from home. Why should they not ask her whether this will incur extra costs?

[TheFallenMadonna]

On working days though ImperialBlether. Not on days off. So - not massively different to working late every day DH.

[janey68]

If employees are routinely expected to work over and above the 'usual' hours though, then it makes no difference that the OP is part time.
I work in a salaried position where sometimes I need to work outside my usual hours which incurs extra childcare. That's part and parcel of my line of work. Being part time should mean that you are doing such things pro rata- not that you're completely exempt from certain aspects of the job.

[SimoneDeBeaver]

haven't read thread, but I would only try to claim for half as your DH should be contributing half as he can't get home either. If that makes sense?

[CPtart]

I sometimes have to cover extra hours for colleagues on holiday etc and wouldn't dream of asking for the child care expenses involved. I can't believe you would seriously consider asking! On the other hand if I need to leave early for anything child-related, assemblies, presentations etc my employer usually accommodates.
Swings and roundabouts.

[Hissy]

I think that if a job is PT, then to ask that person to work 2 solid days without additional compensation or at least the offer of it, is presumptuous.

I think that if your H can't support you in coming home for 2 consecutive early days on a rare occasion, then it's HIM that is unreasonable.

so, first response is to get your H to cover you for 2 days.

IF this happens again in the near future, you can say to the boss, 'TBH, H covered for me last time, but he can't again so soon after the last time, so I will have to get additional childcare to cover.

The fact is you are due to finish at 4pm anyway, and being away from home for 2 days puts you WAY over hours. Something has to give.

Give them this first time, but make sure your H covers it, and then see what happens in the future.

[EssexGurl]

When I worked PT and had to work on my day off, I was paid for the extra hours. This money then went towards my additional nursery fees.

It was not my employers responsibility HOW I arranged my childcare - but I was expecting to be paid for all hours worked.

I don't think you can claim for the childcare, TBH. But why not post in employment section - much better advice there than from me!

[DixieD]

Thanks for all the additional replies. I just wanted to come back on points about DH. As I said earlier in the thread, DHs earns a high salary (much higher than me) and this is in large part due to the hours he works. So his employer already compensates for his overtime. On the other hand my contract was always for a 24 hour working week, so I am getting no extra remuneration for being away. Of course if I was being paid I would never think to ask for childcare costs.
DH can not leave early two evenings in a row. It isn't possible. He needs to work the amount of hours he does or the job doesn't get done. It's the way it is.

[LineRunner]

I think you should ask if your extra hours are covered, or failing that, time off in lieu, of failing that, additional expenses covered.

If the answer is No, then suck it up graciously this time and you will be no worse off. But you may need to have a chat with the boss about being able to take full advantage of future opportunities.

A man wouldn't be afraid to talk about money. This about your worth, not what your other half earns.

[Kungfutea]

I don't get all the 'cheeky' posts. My last employer had a policy of reimbursing additional childcare costs incurred due to travel. My current employer doesn't, but then I'm being paid a lot more so guess they do expect us to deal with it. I definitely think yanbu to ask although I would treat it as a pleasant extra if they agree, not an entitlement.

[Kungfutea]

Just seen that you're not being paid for all the time you're away! Then definitely you shouldn't be out of pocket!! I think your employer is being cheeky here, effectively asking you to work for free.

[Wishihadabs]

TBH OP I think you are on to a very good thing in having set hours 7:30-4. This is your good fortune that you can usually get to pick the dcs up at 4:30-5. Lots of us routinely pay for childcare up to and beyond 7pm (with Pt hours ). TBH I would suck it up and then hit them for a raise if you think the responsibility/seniority of your position has increased. IMO you will be respected a lot more for this than moaning about childcare (which is how it might be perceived).

[Kiwiinkits]

"I think the problem is that by asking for childcare costs, you are making a deal out of your role as a mother. Why isn't your husband asking for childcare costs? I think the way to tackle it is to focus on the extra hours worked. Excessive overtime and I think two nights away is excessive - you have something to discuss there. Your private arrangements about how your children are cared for while you work - your business."

THIS ^^

[theoriginalandbestrookie]

I agree with what Hissy says. I would not ask for the money this time, but mention it next time, if that next time is in the near future.

I'm p/t too and occasionally I have to adjust my working hours or travel because it's part of the job and because it looks like I don't care if I don't do it from time to time.

I keep a note of when I work extra hours though so it means that next time DS has a sports day or I need to finish early because he is at matrons, I have banked some hours for it. Haven't shared this information with my boss as I suspect it may be a one way street in her eyes but I will worry about it when I have to.

[WilsonFrickett]

I think that as you are fairly new to the company this can reasonably seen as an 'extra' that is about you getting to know people, how the organisation works, etc - and on that level, you should just suck it up.

If it came to the point that you were being asked to do this trip every month or something like that, then perhaps you would have to discuss some sort of payment for the additional hours, or time of in lieu.

I have to say though, I've worked in jobs with a lot of travel (both pre and post-DC's) and 'travel nights' were never paid. Although if I was asked to work an additional day I would claim a salary for that day, rather than asking for them to pay for nursery - I just preferred to keep my childcare arrangements out of discussions whenever I possibly could. The men never discussed who was looking after their kids, put it that way...

[SimoneDeBeaver]

Hang on, you're saying that you're not being paid AT ALL for the extra time away?? In which case you need to address that, not the much smaller extra childcare cost.

And it's irrelevant how much your DH earns and therefore how long he works - his children, therefore half the childcare costs come out of his salary.

[spiffysquiffyspiggy]

I work part time, as does dh (for the same organisation). We rotate our non working days for the benefit of the organisation. Tomorrow dh has a meeting so will be going in for the morning even though it is his nonworking day. I will look after the children and we will swap at lunchtime. Then we'll do the same when I'm needed in. Occasionally we are both needed in at the same time and our employer will pay our additional childcare costs.

The way I see it my contract is for 30 hours Mon, wed, thurs and Fri. Dh's 30 hours tues - Fri. Anything they want over and above that is open for negotiation. They say we're needed, I say we need to not be out of pocket. I really don't see the problem. I'm not making money out of them, they get more from me. I will be incredibly flexible because I know that they will do this but can count on the fingers of one hand that we've used this option in the 6 years we've had children.

I'd ask but it appears obvious from the rest of this thread that I'd be deemed as a cheeky so and so glad I work were I do

[Disappearing]

I think it might reflect badly on you if you asked. As I see it, your children are your responsibility, and work is totally separate from that.

In an ideal world there wouldn't be such separation of work and home/children, but that's the way it is.

I also work 3 full days per week, and have to travel occasionally for 4 or 5 days at a time, and I just pay the additional childcare cost myself. However for those extra days I usually get paid for another day's work, or sometimes take a day off in lieu.

[LineRunner]

It shouldn't reflect badly though on anyone to ask for additional hours to be paid, or legitimate additional expenses to be met. Or time off in lieu.

[AnnaRack]

As you're not being paid for the extra hours its your employer who's being cheeky not you! Either you should get paid overtime or time off in lieu, and all additional xosts incurred because you're working axtra hours/different hours and away from home should be paid. And dont let them fob you off that going to Milan is a perk or a treat. I'm shocked that some posters would just pay the extra costs and suck it up, but maybe they can afford to!

[DixieD]

Simone DH and my finances are completely joint. My point about what he earns and the hours he works was in response to posters asking why his employer wasn't being asked to cover the extra childcare. The reason is DH is being paid by his employer for these hours, while for this particular trip I am not.

[deste]

My son and his fiancé gets kennel costs for their dogs when she goes to Houston for work.