to have laughed when said friend said she put her baby to bed later expecting her to sleep later?

[CapuletMontague]

Laughed in my head obviously

Because in a perfect world that would happen. But oh no you put a baby to bed later and of course they are going to wake up earlier.

Sods law.

[DoJo]

Mine generally sleeps later if he goes to bed later too - would recommend everyone at least trying it to see if it works on their children.

[Teapot13]

I think it might be possible to very slowly get children to adjust to later bedtimes and wake-up times. Our DD used to sleep from 7-7 but lately it is more like 9-9 because DH is coming home earlier so I let her stay up to see him. I am sure there are some kids that prefer an early night or a later night, just like any other people, but I think some adjustment is possible if you give it time.

What generally does not work is putting them to bed late as a one-off, so they are overtired, and expecting them to give you a lie-in in the morning. The overtiredness keeps them from getting into deep sleep, so there are night wakings and then (usually) panicked, screaming wakings at the usual time or earlier. This is what the sleep books say and also my experience, at least.

[dreamingbohemian]

I agree Teapot, I think there's a difference between one-offs and routinely going to bed later.

bejeena I think it depends on the child but I will say that here in France, everyone puts their kids to bed at 8 or 9 pm and you never really hear anyone complaining about kids waking up at 5 or 6 am. I think if you use later bedtimes from early on it just becomes normal so I would agree with your DH.

From what I can tell the French think the English are mad for putting kids to bed at 6.30

[Princesspond]

I think mine have inherited my sleepy gene, they sleep for 12 hours regardless of what time they go to bed, if they go to bed late they wake up after 12 hours, it is very handy and civilised of them!

[aufaniae]

I agree that with my DS, putting him to bed later as a one off doesn't result in him waking any later in the morning.

However putting him to bed later - or earlier - does work if you do it consistently.
How do I know this? Because in the UK, we all do it twice a year when the clocks change.

Unless your child has different winter and summer-time waking hours, then it works for them!

It seems to me it's easy to overlook this, and people often do.

[Notanexcitingname]

bjeena there is probably some truth in what dreamingbohemian says, although babies, like adults are individuals, and there will always be some variation.

ISIS Sleep study is probably the best place for scientific evidence on infant sleep :)

[Bejeena]

Thanks dreamingbohemian, we live in Germany and I think 8pm is probably normal bedtime here, but my husband seems to think keeping them up until 9 or 10pm will work. He is insistant he never went to bed early as a child, but I am sure he did and just can't remember. I personally do not want kids up that late as I go to bed about 10ish myself anyway and would not have any wind down time!

[dreamingbohemian]

Ah, I would do 8 pm in your case too Bejeena, you need the wind-down time!

Eventually they will sleep 12 hours normally so that's still an 8 am wakeup time, which is pretty civilised.

I'd suggest to your husband to not have any real expectations for the first months though, it will may take a while to get a routine going.

[HopAndSplash]

If I put 5 m/o DD to bed at 8-11pm she will wake up all through the night and get up at about 5, If I wait until I go to bed at 12-1ish she will sleep with about 1 wake up for a feed, until 9-10 happily. Though she co-sleeps so I think it is more the upset at waking up without me there at the start that makes her unsettled.

[mumeeee]

It works with some children. All mine used to sleep later if they went to bed later,which made it easier on holidays. It didn't work with my sisters children.