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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wonder why people need to "Survive" school holidays?

321 replies

SaggyOldClothCatpuss · 18/02/2013 10:54

There are always threads about this. I've been there, done the small child phase. It's hardly life shattering! We have a garden, a playground nearby and a local beach, tv and nearby friends.
I love spending time with my Dcs, but don't feel the need to occupy them for 24 hours a day! Why would you need to survive your own kids? Hmm

OP posts:
Branleuse · 18/02/2013 11:27

i find holidays really hard. i have 3. they don't always get on and the age gap between ds1 and the others is such that a lot of activities are not suitable for all, yet due to both boys having ASD its really hard to reason with them about it. I also don't drive even though I've been learning for over 2 years and failed 7 times so we are limited as to where we can go etc. my house is small so i rely on good weather and they all pretty much climb the walls. i have sensory processing issues and focus issues which lead me to being overwhelmed and really work better with the routine of school and regular quiet time.
however i work with it and try and get help when i can but its not easy. I must be doing ok considering they still look forward to holidays andthey don't actually know quite what a strain i find it.

i don't appreciate anyone's sympathy for my children though as they are well loved and don't need your pity.

Ashoething · 18/02/2013 11:27

Op- I have a couple of friends like you and quite frankly they often make me stabby with these kind of comments. One is lucky in that her kids are quite happy to play on their pcs ALL day while she lies in bed. My kids wont do that!

My dcs like to be out and about-they cant stand baking/crafts at home. So I have to think of things to do that dont cost a bomb and will cover the ages of 10,6 and 3-not that easy.

But as long as all is well in your ivory tower ehHmm

wordfactory · 18/02/2013 11:29

OP I think part of the problem for some people is that they put themselves under too much pressure.

DS has a mate here at the mo and I suspect they will play PS3 until their eyes and fingers bleed. Then they might go outside with the dog and kick a ball around...

A Mum I know has gone dashing into London today to a particular museum because it 'ties in with the national curriculum.' I guarantee a fraught day for all.

Hulababy · 18/02/2013 11:30

I'm lucky as circumstances means I can enjoy school Holidays. I work in a school so I'm off with dd.

I only have one child so going out is much more affordable though sometimes she wants the company if other children too. Luckily we have the finances to be out and about. We also have holidays away with dh to break it all up.

I arrange for dd to see friends a fair bit - either at ours, at theirs or out and about, sometimes just children, sometimes with adults.

And I let dd entertain herself a bit too. She's 10 now but luckily she's been able to do so since being little. I just try to avoid her having too much screen time so she doesn't spend all her time messaging or on face time with friends!

MsBrown · 18/02/2013 11:31

So there are people out there who don't have anywhere outside, not even a teeny weeny patch of concrete where they can take their children to play? really?

This is the reality for me, anyway, Saggy.

Second floor of a small block of flats. We have a veranda, but it's barely big enough for dd to stand in, let alone play.

Outside, we have three feet of walkway from the communal main door to the main road.

Nearest park is a thirty minute walk away, and is shabby and overcrowded.

Original poster
SaggyOldClothCatpuss · 18/02/2013 11:34

But you see, I look at the multitude of Survival thread titles which appear during the holidays and think they're fairly insulting to the poor children.
I'm so not a smug parent. We're broke, too. We have NEVER done expensive day trips. We don't ever go on holiday. And they can be absolute little shits when they want to, but I find Survival really sad!

OP posts:
mrsjay · 18/02/2013 11:36

I am sure these posters 'poor children' are fine some people like a moan I was tearing my hair out yesterday with a bored 15 yr old I moaned people empathised my 'poor child' is fine, forums are for people to use and if they are having a moan or a rant then what is wrong with that Confused

DreamingOfTheMaldives · 18/02/2013 11:36

Op, if it's the council estate I'm thinking of (Wythenshawe) let's not pretend it is a concrete jungle! There are a lot of green areas nearby, Wythenshawe park being one of them!

If not Wythenshawe then I apologise.

flurp · 18/02/2013 11:37

I agree up to a point. Half terms are fine - a week is easy to fill.
Easter and Christmas - OK. They have presents/eggs and bank holidays to enjoy.
Summer = Hell on earth. 6 weeks is a long time unless you are a SAHM with plenty of money. Luckily mine are older now and it is easier but when they were small I had to plan every day with military precision - childcare, work hours, holiday, making the money last... by September I was a quicering wreck.
I love spending time with my dc but 6 weeks is just too bloody much 'quality time' for anyone.

Startail · 18/02/2013 11:37

We have a big garden and I'm lucky enough to have DDs who mostly get on.
However, cold wet Feb half terms, that don't line up with the county next door, so DD1s BFs aren't on holiday and neither are 3 DFs of DD2s are very annoying.

DD1 gets to see her friends in an evening, but DD1 is still of an age where she likes play dates with hers.

I'm huffy because my coffee drinking mate is also tied up with DDs when I'm not.

We live right on the county boundary and many extra curricular and holiday activities are buggered by the holidays not lining up. The year our council decided not to have Easter at Easter was truly mad.

piprabbit · 18/02/2013 11:38

So you thought you'd start a lovely positive thread that celebrates spending time with our DCs in the holidays? Perhaps a reworded OP would result in happier stories.

KellyElly · 18/02/2013 11:39

AIBU, yes you are. OP, no I'm not. One of those threads Grin

Maryz · 18/02/2013 11:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mrsjay · 18/02/2013 11:41

so if your children are being little shits how would you describing your coping mechanism then op? because I do think people saying surviving is there way of saying coping with the holidays or not

Original poster
SaggyOldClothCatpuss · 18/02/2013 11:41

No, not Wythenshawe. Our playgrounds are overcrowded and scruffy too. But the kids don't really care to they.
I know most people are just moaning and venting, we all love out kids, it just makes me a bit Sad to read these titles.

OP posts:
mrsjay · 18/02/2013 11:42

with the Irish 9-10 weeks in primary and 13 weeks in secondary summer holidays.

13 weeks WHAT Shock I think it is about that in america too

Startail · 18/02/2013 11:42

I love the long summer holidays. Yes I'm a SAHM, yes we aren't broke, yes I have a car and we have bikes and a garden.

Also if you go for a day trip it isn't hell.

In wet half terms everything is crammed with other depressed family's, with six weeks and holidays and play schemes etc. most places are pretty civilised.

cory · 18/02/2013 11:42

I do actually enjoy those holidays dc and I spend together. And feel fairly confident that they enjoy those when I work. But smug threads just make my skin crawl. Is it so difficult to imagine a life different from your own?

MsBrown · 18/02/2013 11:43

Our playgrounds are overcrowded and scruffy too. But the kids don't really care to they.

Well, my dd does.

Crowds upset her. People running around, screeching, bumping into her - upsets her.

Original poster
SaggyOldClothCatpuss · 18/02/2013 11:44

Diversionary tactics mainly, MrsJay, and being slightly deaf helps! Grin Get the felt tips out, put a video on, give them a duster and some polish...

OP posts:
fromparistoberlin · 18/02/2013 11:45

OP I think you are assuming the "survive word" means surviving their kids company?? whereas I think for some people its hard logistically, either of both working, or have no ££££

in your situation I'd love the holidays!

TolliverGroat · 18/02/2013 11:46

If I send my children to play in a car park on a regular basis then surviving the school holidays would indeed be something of a challenge...

spanky2 · 18/02/2013 11:46

Mine have already had a huge argument this morning . They need constant supervision as they are chalk and cheese. They enjoy the drama of winding each other up. I am educated have a car and parks but it is still hard to please both of them and keep the peace . I love my boys but the holidays are hard work .

HumphreyCobbler · 18/02/2013 11:46

Some people have to juggle working over the children's holidays. Not everyone can manage to stay at home the whole time.

I agree with Mintyy - survive is just a term ffs. It doesn't mean you hate your children.

I love it now but when mine were smaller it was challenging.

fromparistoberlin · 18/02/2013 11:46

I know what you mean though. I work FT and I do feel a bit Sad when I read some threads