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AIBU?

To think this teacher is fucking loopy?

271 replies

OverReactionMuch · 16/02/2013 18:12

DS2 (just 5) apparently broke a branch off one of the trees in the school playground. He was swinging on it (normal boy behaviour?).

Teacher, who is Head of KS1 then paraded him around all the KS1 classes with the offending branch lecturing the other DC on how naughty my DC was and what a terrible thing he did.

She also phoned me (I did not know she had taken him round the classes) to inform me of my DS's 'crime'. I said I would talk to him. She also took the 'dead' branch into the afterschool club and showed all the DC there and so the staff could show me the offending article when I picked him up.

DS has said that he did not mean for the branch to come off.

I am actually quite furious that she has demonised my DS to the other DCs. DS has found it very hard to settle into school and I actually had a meeting with this woman before he started at school as I was concerned about how he would settle (undiagnosed SN is my mother's gut instinct) and she has totally ignored every thing I said.

AIBU to loudly voice my displeasure on Monday?

OP posts:

Report

NotSoNervous · 17/02/2013 16:59

I've only read your OP.

She's completely took it too far and it was completely out of order to put your DS through that. She should have phoned you and let you deal with it at home not drag him round and humiliate hm like that

Feenie · 17/02/2013 17:09

Thank God my kids are grown up and not having to deal with you types.

I think we can all agree there.

Wewereherefirst · 17/02/2013 17:10

If the OP is so enraged about this, I hope she's not considering taking her child back to the school. After all, if the teacher has humiliated the child, it would be pretty cruel to make them stay at such a substandard school with draconian punishments as this is.

countrykitten · 17/02/2013 17:14

Not sure what I have said here to get people's knickers in a twist. The OP does not know what happened and that is why she is going in to school isn't it?

It's not a case of my disbelieving her - more a case of wait and find out the actual facts of the matter from another adult not as reported via a five year old who is in trouble at school and knows that his mum will charge in and defend him because she has a thing about teachers

countrykitten · 17/02/2013 17:17

And the description of the teacher by the OP as 'fucking loopy' kind of tells you all that you need to know about the OP's attitude doesn't it? I am sure that the teacher in question will handle her skilfully and defuse the situation - we get quite good at that as teachers - despite the OP whipping herself up in to a rage over the weekend.

Salmotrutta · 17/02/2013 17:22

Actual facts?

What, like indisputable ones? From objective witnesses?

I wonder what the outcome would be?

MissAnnersley · 17/02/2013 17:23

I don't disbelieve the OP. I've just advised a bit of caution when going into the school.

Surely it is best to hear both sides of a story? Just common sense really.

Jux · 17/02/2013 17:23

I wonder if the school were aware that the branch was unsafe, and had specifically warned the children against it as it was likely to break and could hurt a child badly?

It seems that if a few kids are habitually swinging on it (sounds like it was something the children - not specifically yours, and not just yours), it should either have been lopped before now, or the tree should have been fenced off.

countrykitten · 17/02/2013 17:24

Ah - bingo! It was all the school's fault after all!

FFS.

BoneyBackJefferson · 17/02/2013 17:27

amillionyears
"Boney, so you dont believe the op either?"

I believe parts of the OP's post, I think that the drip feed has weakened her arguement and her attitude towards the school/teacher is poor.

amillionyears · 17/02/2013 17:28

I agree that some posters do not post very well at the beginning of a thread, and can get some peoples' backs up.

But I have also learnt on MN, as in life, that that does not necessarily mean that they are not right.

Jux · 17/02/2013 17:28

countrykitten. Am I doing AIBU wrong? I don't come here often.....

Maryz · 17/02/2013 17:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MissAnnersley · 17/02/2013 17:45

I am not assuming the OP made it up but this didn't happen to her, it happened to her child.

If it happened exactly as it was described then it is unacceptable but the OP won't know until she goes into the school.

I cannot be the only person to have heard a pretty hair raising story from their DC only to find out it didn't happen the way it was described?

countrykitten · 17/02/2013 17:52

MissAnnersley a voice of reason and balance.

countrykitten · 17/02/2013 17:55

And fwiw I can't see where any poster has said that they don't believe the OP - just advise caution and not to go in to school with an aggressive and confrontational attitude.

If it should transpire that the teacher has acted inappropriately THEN is the time to get annoyed and want answers.

BoneyBackJefferson · 17/02/2013 17:57

I am more than happy to be wrong.

Kirk1 · 17/02/2013 17:57

Countrykitten, I'm sure you are a lovely teacher, but you surely know not everyone in teaching ought to be there? The fact that this teacher used the phrase "something dreadful" to describe an unfortunate but fairly minor incident rings alarm bells for me. Despite OP coming across as defensive and frankly rude (sorry OP, but you do) I don't see any reason to call her an outright liar.

OP in your position I would be frothing too. It's easy to say what you're really thinking on an Internet forum! I think your best attack would be a speech something along the lines of - I don't want to take the word of children at face value, but I have had from more than one source that you marched DS around the whole school to tell everyone how naughty he was. I can't believe that you would do such a dreadful thing so I am coming to you for your side of it. - This puts her in the position of having to own up to something you have already suggested is unreasonable behaviour from her and coming up with a way to justify herself. Or give a reasonable explanation which may be a course of action that was measured and proportionate after all. Keep an open mind

countrykitten · 17/02/2013 18:01

kirk1 I have not called her a liar! Where has that come from?

And yes, I am a lovely teacher!

countrykitten · 17/02/2013 18:03

BTW - not being rude but I don't understand your first sentence fully...I got the first bit obviously....!

WhatKindofFool · 17/02/2013 18:09

I think that I order to resolve this matter the OP, the mother, the son,the teacher and the head should discuss it with the help of Jeremy Kyle. That will sort it.

Feenie · 17/02/2013 18:16

With MrsRajeshKoothrappali in the audience

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amillionyears · 17/02/2013 18:25

countrykitten "Maryz and others you dont actually know this happened and neither does the op"

That is where it looked like you were saying that the op may be lying

But perhaps you meant it as in, the information the op received from her dc may be incorrect.

But the teacher did ring her up, and seems to have confirmed the afterschool club bit at least.

Fairenuff · 17/02/2013 18:28

The fact that all of you absolutely don't believe it must mean that it is unacceptable, no?

Maryz I would agree with your statement here.

If it did happen in exactly the way the OP describes, (...paraded him around all the KS1 classes with the offending branch lecturing the other DC on how naughty my DC was and what a terrible thing he did) then yes, of course it's unacceptable.

Or, if the teacher was supervising the child at the time and said to him something like, 'lets go and remind the other children that it's not safe to swing on the trees, it's lucky you weren't hurt' then it's a different matter.

OP, when did this happen, btw, were you not on half term last week, or next week. I know they seem to be a bit different at the moment. Or perhaps you're not in the UK?

Pagwatch · 17/02/2013 18:30

I do not believe the OP made it up.
I do however have considerable experience of listening to very detailed descriptions of events from children right up to years 6 and 7, which have turned out t be a mixture of imagination, minimising and wish fulfilment.

I listened to a gaggle of year 5s describe in great detail a disagreement between two parents two weeks ago which ended in air pulling and some pushing and shoving.I was quite excited. Sadly it was actually a bit of shouting yet they remain convinced...

I also think the OP is quite determined to see her child as a victim and the teacher as 'loopy'. I am not sure life is ever quite so straightforward which is why one tends to try and find out before wading in..

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