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AIBU?

to consider tracking down this man and demanding that he look after my kids for the rest of the day?

54 replies

TandB · 12/11/2012 16:21

DP works in London part of the week and I come up with the kids about once every two or three weeks. We stay in a flat in a managed building with an underground carpark. Parking is very tightly regulated because they used to have problems with people taking over extra spaces for second cars or bike storage etc - now you aren't even allowed to swap spaces with someone else by agreement.

I have a deadline for a magazine article looming. It was a tight deadline because the editor needed to replace another article at short notice, but it should have been easily doable. I never leave things to the last minute but I've had a few arrangements go wrong and both kids have been ill and I now have two days to get it into shape, neither of which I have childcare for, meaning that I need to do it during naps or in the evenings which I don't like doing because my brain stops working at about 7pm and it is a complicated topic.

We don't have much of a routine re: naps, but one thing I can absolutely rely on is both DCs having a long nap in the afternoon if I do something tiring in the morning and manage to keep DS2 awake, or only let him have a catnap. I therefore planned today with military precision. I took them to softplay and wore them out, had lunch before getting in the car, and then managed to keep them both awake until about 5 minutes before getting home, when they both conked out.

This was absolutely perfect timing. If they fall asleep 5 to 10 minutes before getting home then they will wake up, grizzle and moan until we get inside and then fall asleep again straight away. But the timing is crucial - if they sleep for much longer than that, DS1 won't go back to sleep at all, and DS2 will take absolutely ages to go back down and then will only sleep for about half an hour. So I was delighted with myself and was pretty much rubbing my hands with glee as we pulled into the carpark, anticipating about 1 1/2 to 2 hours of uninterupted work.

There was someone in our parking space.

I waited, thinking that someone had just pulled in to pick something up - we are a couple of spaces along from one of the lifts and the other spaces nearby are used for storage. No-one turned up. I pulled into another space and ran up to the front office where the security guy told me that someone was moving out, but he didn't know which flat it was. I asked him to find out and get the car moved asap. About 25 minutes later, a chap saunters down to the carpark and starts taking stuff out of the car - out, you note. Not in.

Me: Er, excuse me. You are in my space.
Him (breezily): Oh yes, sorry, I'm moving out.
Me: Yes. So I heard. But you are doing it in my space.
Him: Well, it's nearer the lift.
Me: It is, isn't it? It's also my space.
Him: Oh. Sorry about that.
Me: Did security not speak to you about it?
Him: Oh yes, he said someone was waiting.
Me: But you're still unloading your car.
Him: But I'm moving out.
Me: Well can you go and do it in your own space?
Him (a bit stroppily): Fine. I'll move then.
Me: Yes. Good plan.
Him (unloading some more things) Just a minute.
Me: NO. NOT JUST A MINUTE. NOW. RIGHT NOW. IMMEDIATELY.
Him: (even more stroppily): Can't you wait?
Me: I have sleeping kids in the car and I need to get them inside asap otherwise they are going to wake up and stop me getting any work done this afternoon.
Him: Well how was I supposed to know that?
Me: You're not. Which is why you don't take someone else's space without asking. You have no idea how much you are going to inconvenience someone.
Him: Well you could have parked in someone else's space.
Me: And what about when they wanted their space?
Him: Well you could come down and move it then.
Me: MOVEYOURCARMOREYOURCARMOVEYOURCAR.

So he moved the car into his own space.

Which was two spaces along and one row across. This represented approximately 15 feet further to walk. He took my space to avoid walking 15 feet.

So I unloaded the kids, with him chuntering at the security guy about my unreasonableness, and got them upstairs. After 30 minutes of trying DS2 slept for a total of 10 minutes. DS1 slept for about 20 minutes. They are now awake for the duration and I have got nothing done. Except this epic whinge on MN of course.

So bearing in mind this pillock is the reason why the DSs are now awake, would it be unreasonable of me to go and knock on every door in the building until I find him, and then demand that he entertains my children for the rest of the day? Not just 2 hours - the rest of the day. My reasoning is that I am now so irritated that I will need a cup of tea and a bit of MNing before I can possibly be expected to do anything constructive.

I could also then ask him why moving out involves taking stuff out of his car and into the building because last time I checked, the moving out process involves removing stuff from the place you are vacating.

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Shamentincturepincher · 12/11/2012 21:53

Phew! So worth it!

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Tee2072 · 12/11/2012 21:47

Okay I get ya now!

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Shamentincturepincher · 12/11/2012 21:43

Ok, go more East Coast. A la Lowenstein...

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Tee2072 · 12/11/2012 21:02

Like Valley Girl, you mean? Because I lived in California for nearly 10 years and I'm not aware of an actual accent.

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Shamentincturepincher · 12/11/2012 21:00

It is now. Try it in a Californian accent, it helps enormously!

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Tee2072 · 12/11/2012 20:40

Is consequating a word? Hmm

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Shamentincturepincher · 12/11/2012 20:25

YANBU. Consequating someone for their selfish actions is a gift.

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FellowshipOfFestiveFellows · 12/11/2012 20:25

Yanbu I feel your pain.

We are the only house on our street with a drive, as our house used to be a shop and cab office. People constantly park over the space, or in it on occasions too, and get the right arse when I tell them to bloody move. The traffic warden does sod all either, as for some reason if the cars have a residents permit, despite the white line he never tickets them. However when dps mate was unloading a bookcase part on the drive, part on the line, he got a ticket. Bloody annoying

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MuddlingMackem · 12/11/2012 20:04

YANBU. I remember some very stressful months of precision nap timing for DD.

And if people won't move parking places perhaps they would like to pay for painting new numbers on the spaces so they match the right flat. That might make them more amenable to swapping back. ;-)

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TandB · 12/11/2012 19:55

I don't know if anyone ever does get fined - the management tend to just nag everyone into submission!

Most people are surprisingly obedient - although there was a wholesale rebellion over an attempt to ban anyone storing anything in their parking space. They did give up on that one. There is also an ongoing attempt to reorder the parking spaces. Apparently when the building first opened there was a bit of a free for-all over spaces, and when they assigned specific spaces, people did a bit of space-trading and they finished up with a definitive list of parking spaces where the number on the space doesn't correspond to the number on the flat.

When you move in the management have to consult the list and go "Ah, yes, flat 92. That will be space 106 for you then."

Someone suggested recently that it might be sensible to actually make the spaces correspond with the flat numbers but this caused an almighty row because some people have had the same parking space since 1995 and are hugely attached to it.

If they do re-order the spaces, I definitely want to be there the day they try to enforce it. I suspect there will be punch-ups.

I'll be sure to invite MN.

Anyway, kids finally in bed. Article beckons. Thanks for the support - will arrange the knit-in asap.

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Some0ne · 12/11/2012 19:43

I've been known to rant and rave at bin lorries, barking dogs, children playing, and also whichever of my children isn't the one I'm currently trying to persuade to sleep Blush I feel your pain.

I can't knit very well but I can probably crochet something insulting.

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cumfy · 12/11/2012 19:25

Did they fine him ?

Without fines/bans the management co may find difficult in practice to enforce these "strict regulations".

Oh and what's to stop residents swapping vehicles if they can't swap spaces ?Grin

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HongKongPooey · 12/11/2012 19:23

I was raging at a reversing tarmaccing vehicle only today BEEEEEEP BEEEEEEP... one little bright eye popped open as I swerved down a sidestreet at speed to get away from the alarm clock wake up.

YANBU, but I do not knit, quilt or sew. I can do cakes......icing.....

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LRDtheFeministDragon · 12/11/2012 18:18

Wouldn't a tiny cock-warmer be more appropriate?

I do like the detail of your plans, though.

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DoubleYew · 12/11/2012 18:16

When ds was younger I got exceptionally annoyed at some builders making a noise (in a public street in the middle of the day Blush) because they woke him up.

PMSL at the receptionist ringmaster of cars.

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TandB · 12/11/2012 18:16

In fact, we could turn his car into a multi-textile work of art. LRD could do a parking wanker festive bonnet cover, Mrs Hoarder could knit a cock-warmer shaped car-jacket thingy. I used to know how to do lacemaking so I could cover his bonnet in intricate lacy patterns which spelled out "Knob Face".

Anyone any good at ribbon-weaving or similar?

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TandB · 12/11/2012 18:12

Could everyone perhaps contribute to a giant cock-warmer for his car?

I think he'd like that. It would make him feel all wanted. He might not move out at all.

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MrsHoarder · 12/11/2012 18:10

I quite like him, but he was taking the Mick out of the fiddly baby mittens I was making at the weekend. He'll probably laugh or hate me and put whole chillies in my food

I've got a good long extension lead too, I'll bring that.

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LRDtheFeministDragon · 12/11/2012 18:07

One quilter, reporting for duty! Grin

I do it by hand so I could most happily sit there with a lot of pins and papers I'd have to move veeerrry sloooowwwly if anyone showed up.

I fancy making a festive one spelling out 'parking wanker' in red and green.

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TandB · 12/11/2012 18:05

I think we could probably accommodate a couple of quilters, but someone would need to bring a very long extension lead for the sewing machines.

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UnbridledPositivity · 12/11/2012 18:03

YABU: someone as twattish inconsiderate as this would probably be rubbish at looking after children!

YANBU to stage a knit-in! Grin

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TandB · 12/11/2012 17:59

MrsHoarder. Would I be right in thinking that you and MIL's DP don't get on? Grin

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TandB · 12/11/2012 17:58

Vodka - you'd love my office. We have a carpark.

The only problem is that it is a bizarre, L-shaped carpark with a bit sticking off it, and it isn't actually big enough for everyone who needs to park in it. So if someone needs to get out in the middle of the day, it's like one of those sliding puzzles where you can't move one piece until you've moved several others out of the way. It opens onto a main road, so you can't even back out to let other people out - you have to manouevre round each other with the receptionist standing in the middle yelling "KFP - 2 feet forward with wheel on full lock. KFP's colleague - stand-by to move into space vacated by KFP. NO! KFP's Boss I did NOT tell you to move. Back into that space by the bins right now!"

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MrsHoarder · 12/11/2012 17:57

I'll come. Can I start on the tiny cock-warmer I'm making mil's dp for Christmas?

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TandB · 12/11/2012 17:54

Oops, no, that's my space.

Go to that one, turn right and cross over to the next row. Space with a BMW and a motorbike next door.

Full of knitters.

And possibly some people having sex.

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