To think a present to 'Mummy from baby'

[BimboNo5]

As in a newborn baby (just because) is the ultimate in preciousness?
Or am I just being a meanie?

[PhilipJFry]

Cbear6- I'd have taken the KFC over the eternity ring any day!

[worraliberty]

What's dreadful about wanting a boob job as a present?

[takethisonehereforastart]

I personally would have been a bit if someone had given me a present from my LO when he was a newborn but I can't see that it really does any harm either if it makes the parents happy.

But actually, not long after LO was born it was Mother's Day, and DH did give me a present and card from him and I did it back for Father's Day. It was nice, and because of our previous losses it made it special to finally be able to celebrate the days as parents, even knowing full well that LO had nothing to do with the choosing, shopping for, writing on or wrapping any of the cards and presents.

But the Mother's Day I'm really looking forward to is the first time LO comes home from school with a card he made himself.

DH also gave me a ring when LO was born, but again I think it was more special than a 'push present' for the sake of it. It had been a difficult pregnancy requiring lots of examinations, operations, injections, bed rest and worry. My previous pregnancies had always ended with the loss of our baby and the births taking place with us knowing our baby had died or was going to die very shortly afterwards. I'd been very ill and almost died during the birth of our daughter and our marriage had been strained to breaking point with the grief and outside stresses placed on us following the losses.

Yet we came through, we were still together and we'd finally had the baby we longed for and were a 'proper' family. That would have been enough for anyone but DH said he wanted to get me something special that had personal meaning to us and all three of our babies. The ring means the world to me because of all it stands for personally, from the reasons DH had when he went out and bought it to the memories it brings back to me when I look at it.

[worraliberty]

Actually, far worse than presents 'from baby' are the FB profiles that spring up 'belonging to baby' and being 'updated' daily by said baby

MN really needs a gagging emoticon

[Catslikehats]

Are any "push presents" just for the "sake of it". Presumably they are all bought with the intention of celebrating the birth of a child. Apart from the vulgar, media coined phrase, I see nothing wrong with that - after all gift giving is a fairly standard response to celebrations in our society.

[Awomancalledhorse]

YANBU.

Our pfb is due just before christmas the year, MIL has already asked if we want any 'babies 1st christmas' tat
I wouldn't expect mothers day/fathers day stuff from a child until it's old enough to make/buy it alone.

[takethisonehereforastart]

Yes, someone up thread said her DH gave her one because the family presssured him into it. She didn't want one and it doesn't sound like he would have bought one otherwise.

To me, that's buying a present just for the sake of it.

[catgirl1976]

God I don't want any "babies 1st christmas tat". But that is very different from a baby giving a present. My DS will be giving grandma a kindle and daddy an ipad so I think they will be ok with that..... Nothing with "Babies first" anything on it though.. just tacky.

[IHaveAFeatureWallAndILikeIt]

I had a mothers day card from my baby before he was even born, it said that he couldn't wait to meet me :-) I liked it, so ner!

[Catslikehats]

takethat I am sorry I missed that. Seems odd for family to pressure someone into buying their wife a present. Maybe they assumed that was what the wife would like and thought a bit of gentle ecncouragement wouldn't go amiss

[takethisonehereforastart]

Sorry TheQueenofDenial, I was being attacked by a two year old with welding a big, plastic dinosaur bone when I posted that last message, and it came out unfinished and with odd spellings.

As I was saying, buying a present he otherwise wouldn't have bought, that they perhaps couldn't afford and she didn't actually want, just because the family have put some pressure on him to buy something they think he should buy but aren't going to contribute towards, is buying a present just for the sake of it.

It probably has special meaning to them now, but at the time it was an unnecessary expense with no thought behind it other than that it was the done thing and everyone was expecting him to buy one so he did.

[takethisonehereforastart]

x-posted. And still being attacked by the dinosaur bone!

[Catslikehats]

X posts there

I undersaand what you are saying. No one should feel under any pressure ever with gift giving, but I do think that a gift on the birth of a child (and that is all this is really) is a nice thing to ^do, whether the gift is a KFC bucket or a three carat tiffany eternity.

I have bnever understood the MN mentality which gets women up in arms about the concept

[catgirl1976]

mmmmmmmm KFC for me please!

[takethisonehereforastart]

No I agree, (most) gifts are good. I say most because I was once given a big metal warthog and I still don't know why.

I did once see a thread where birth presents (got to be better than push presents) were being described as patronising and thought at the time that if that were true, it still has to be one of the nicer ways to be patronised by somebody.

[Thumbwitch]

I made DH get me an eternity ring after DS was born but that was because I had no engagement ring and I wanted another ring to go with my wedding ring. My grandmother was given a ring by my grandfather after each child so I thought "why not?"

I didn't get a Christmas present from DS (he was 3w old) and still haven't, I don't think - but after several hints I did get a mothers' day present and card, although iirc the card was "Happy Mothers' Day to my Wife" signed by DH and DS, which was highly inappropriate! That was just the first one - DH has it in hand now and I get a card from DS. Which is fine. I am his mother, after all and I'm not fussed that it's all contrived.

[whatisitnow]

Hmmm, I thought the ultimate push present was the baby, but maybe I'm just naive.

[CBear6]

Mothers/Fathers Day, Christmas, and birthdays DH and I get a gift "from the baby" (not that he's much of a tiny baby now, 2yo last week) but I didn't see the point of a gift "from the baby" immediately after the birth. I'd given him the gift of DS and he'd given me the gift of DS, we made each other parents - and the KFC of course, won't be getting one this time because the nearest shop has closed down.

[rnbsmum]

I am really not into naff slogan type stuff or "baby's first...", but we were bought little "Baby's first Christmas" tree decorations which had the year on when DD and then DS were born. I find it quite nostalgic now to put those up from 2003 and 2006 each year and think back through the different Christmasses.

[Panzee]

I didn't push. Should I have got a "lie on my back and get sliced open" present? :o

[missorinoco]

Fifibebe, I'd have liked a couple of packets of biscuits. I pushed, that failed then had to get cut open, so technically I think I should be able to claim twice.

[celebmum]

Ooh ive never heard of push present! My DH bought me a diamond ring after the birth of our DS [luckygirl emoticon!] but this was given from him, as a well done/I'm proud of you/I love you/thankyou for DS present and not from DS himself? (from DS I got an extra stone in weight, lots of lovely stitches and a bagful of strechmarks! )

So was the ring a 'push present' then??

[celebmum]

Ooh in response to OP, DS was 11months old on mothers day, DH bought me card & gift from DS as DS obviously too small to go to the shops! I'd have been most upset had I not got anything from DS!

[rhondajean]

I bought DH a card for fathers day when I was pregnant with DD1. We were both just so excited. She was part of our family straight away.

My mother told him that he MUST buy me flowers for giving birth and even drove him to a florist to order them haha. He had actually bought me a rather lovely and expensive watch as a memento (we had been married less than a year so an eternity ring seemed - well - not right).

I didnt realise people thought this was horrible, (I did find the flowers funny,) it ws a way of marking a big thing happening to us and him saying thanks for me going through all the physical bit of making it possible. DD2 was in ICBU for 3 weeks and thoughts of presents went right out of our minds although he did take me on a wee shopping trip for new clothes when she was out.

[Marymaryalittlecontrary]

How bizarre - like whatisitnow, I also thought that the lovely baby you end up with is present enough.