To wonder why men in movies and TV do so well for themelves

[LolaRennt]

Have notice several films lately where men like this <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.com/imgres?q=seth+rogan&um=1&hl=en&sa=N&rlz=1B3GGLL_en-GB___GB388&biw=1024&bih=402&tbm=isch&tbnid=L4jc7p1n_q2RrM:&imgrefurl=www.hookingupsmart.com/2008/12/04/girltalk/for-true-love-pick-a-beta-male/&docid=gRsKSQEEeZzyyM&w=270&h=356&ei=3XNFTtziDceCtgeRndX0BQ&zoom=1&iact=rc&dur=784&page=1&tbnh=104&tbnw=77&start=0&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:0&tx=42&ty=55" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">guy not only have girlfriends-but many hot girls throwing themselves at them

or this tv show The World According to Jim star this guy <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.com/imgres?q=jim+belushi&um=1&hl=en&sa=N&rlz=1B3GGLL_en-GB___GB388&biw=1024&bih=402&tbm=isch&tbnid=kyCkNzHu-Ur-sM:&imgrefurl=www.ladyobama.com/2010/03/jim-belushi-loses-it-on-a-flight-cops-called/&docid=-E1pyNuaEgpZFM&w=1106&h=1886&ei=WnNFTp6KFpCitgfU3IjtBQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=331&vpy=-5&dur=1468&hovh=293&hovw=172&tx=151&ty=101&page=2&tbnh=111&tbnw=63&start=15&ndsp=15&ved=1t:429,r:9,s:15" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">jim belushi and <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.com/imgres?q=courtney+thorne-smith&um=1&hl=en&rlz=1B3GGLL_en-GB___GB388&biw=1024&bih=402&tbm=isch&tbnid=AxMSOP2jdqabLM:&imgrefurl=www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/archive/tags/Courtney%252Bthorne%252Bsmith/default.aspx&docid=eYfJbwuEDRe3eM&w=290&h=454&ei=7HJFTpjyI4GXtwe0mYjfBQ&zoom=1&iact=rc&dur=363&page=1&tbnh=99&tbnw=69&start=0&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:6,s:0&tx=55&ty=55" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">Courtney Thorn Smith

Or another likely couple <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.com/imgres?q=the+king+of+queens&um=1&hl=en&sa=N&rlz=1B3GGLL_en-GB___GB388&biw=1024&bih=402&tbm=isch&tbnid=cw6DkbIiE_dQSM:&imgrefurl=www.cbs.com/primetime/king_of_queens/&docid=b377am-XHnnk-M&w=389&h=272&ei=EXRFTrqBOcmBtgfEiZHuBQ&zoom=1&iact=rc&dur=1059&page=1&tbnh=116&tbnw=143&start=0&ndsp=6&ved=1t:429,r:0,s:0&tx=99&ty=92" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">The King of Queens


AIBU or in RL would all these men still be virgins?

[suzikettles]

Actually, I fancy both Seth Rogan and whatsisface from KofQ.

I do have a bit of a type though. I don't fancy skinny men, even if they're skinny and a bit muscly, eg "wiry"

I suspect this isn't the point of the thread..

[LolaRennt]

I think people took my OP a bit more serioulsly than intended. I just mean I think it's a bit crap how women have to be hot to play the wives of men who aren't particularly attractive. How does that make me shallow? Surely it makes the casting directors shallow?

I am a size 22 and I recently started a thread about how I have never walked naked in front of dh because I am incredibly unconfident about my appearence. So I really don't expect everyone to conform to a type.

The wouldn't they be virgins comment was just a joke and loosely based on a quote by Peter Crouch that I always thought was hilarious. I obviously don't mean it and peronally if I were rich famous and being paid to make out with people much better looking than myself I wouldn't be worried about what someone on the internet has to say about it.

What would you be if you wern't a footballer?

[BupcakesandCunting]

OK, exagerration for comedy effect. You know what I mean, though? If we didn't have a "filter" for attractiveness (on a personal level) that was prejudiced on looks initially, wouldn't we just fancy everyone?

[TrillianAstra]

If we didn't judge on looks we'd be dry-humping each others legs

??? ???

Er, speak for yourself. NO matter how attractive someone is I can hold myself back :o

[hoolabombshell]

I haven't seen any "pulling apart" of people's looks on this thread, for goodness sake. Just a discussion of what different people do and do not find attractive. What's the big deal? It is human nature.

I have been attracted to looks, sense of humour and intelligence in the past and can say for sure that my exes didn't always have all 3. Did I care? No. But something about them was attractive to me at the time. Whatever.

[BupcakesandCunting]

I like those links, Trillian. :)

Jim Belushi is attractive, IMO. Nice eyes. Butch. Yes please.

But then I don't have a "type". I've never understood only going for a certain type. You're disqualifying a massive percentage of people because they don't have the right look. It's weird.

"And I'm sorry you don't like my opinion, Bupcakes, but I don't think your personal experience speaks for everyone. I think pulling people apart on their looks is cruel, sorry that offends you. I hope you are never on the receiving end in RL. I'll leave you to it."

I don't "pull people apart on their looks" I can accept that some people are unattractive to me, but I don't pull them apart on it. Apart from people like Jordan, people who make a living from thrusting their image into the public psyche. I most certainly wouldn't rip into someone for not conforming to my idea of what is appealing. However, to suggest that we do not judge on looks is naive. We do, even if we don't realise it. If we didn't, we'd all be dry-humping each other's legs and that. I probably have been on the receiving end of it. I've got a fairly large nose and am a bit, well, robust. I can live with it. It's life. My husband finds me attractive. I think I'm an OK person. I can live with it.

[TrillianAstra]

The question of why looks are considered much more important when casting women compared to when casting men is a valid one.

Tvtropes has some interesting stuff on the Hollywood version of "ugly" and the Hollywood version of "fat", both of which apply almost exclusively to women.

Saying "these men would be virgins in real life" is incredibly shallow.

I've just googled Jim Belushi. He's an actual man. He looks <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?q=jim+belushi&um=1&hl=en&sa=N&rlz=1C1AFAB_en-GBGB441GB442&biw=1366&bih=643&tbm=isch&tbnid=cZZdkyjIqLWteM:&imgrefurl=www.bluesbrotherscentral.com/profiles/jim-belushi/&docid=XNNCH9ugK6HvzM&w=300&h=400&ei=sjVGTs3sN4y68gPTmJXMBg&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=714&vpy=105&dur=1928&hovh=259&hovw=194&tx=90&ty=147&page=1&tbnh=155&tbnw=127&start=0&ndsp=24&ved=1t:429,r:4,s:0" rel="nofollow noindex" target="_blank">like this apparently. I doubt he is a virgin. He's not ugly.

[TrillianAstra]

The question of why looks are considered much more important when casting women compared to when casting men is a valid one.

Tvtropes has some interesting stuff on the Hollywood version of "ugly" and the Hollywood version of "fat", both of which apply almost exclusively to women.

Saying "these men would be virgins in real life" is incredibly shallow.

I've just googled Jim Belushi. He's an actual man. He looks [http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?q=jim+belushi&um=1&hl=en&sa=N&rlz=1C1AFAB_en-GBGB441GB442&biw=1366&bih=643&tbm=isch&tbnid=cZZdkyjIqLWteM:&imgrefurl=www.bluesbrotherscentral.com/profiles/jim-belushi/&docid=XNNCH9ugK6HvzM&w=300&h=400&ei=sjVGTs3sN4y68gPTmJXMBg&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=714&vpy=105&dur=1928&hovh=259&hovw=194&tx=90&ty=147&page=1&tbnh=155&tbnw=127&start=0&ndsp=24&ved=1t:429,r:4,s:0 like this]] apparently. I doubt he is a virgin. He's not ugly.

[differentnameforthis]

Years ago I worked with a very attractive, glamorous woman. And all those that worked with her were when we finally met her dh.

He was v large. And short. And not really all that attractive. The total opposite of what you would have expected. But it was simple, she fell in love with him! She didn't fall in love with his looks, or his height. And they were/are a great team! The love between them really shows.

It isn't all about looks, OP.

[MsAnnThroppy]

True if you only ever talk to, work with, study with, get introduced by a mate to, etc men who fall into your subjective idea of physical beauty. I did not particularly find my DH or previous partners of 1 and 13 years physically attractive when I met them (respectively, at university and at work). No phwoar moment there. None of them are "lookers", particularly. But they all drew me in with their personalities and the rest fell into place. I'm talking about a process of months here, not hooking up with someone you meet on the night and decide "he's the one" based on looks alone. Sorry, but it's completely insane to never try to get to know someone you don't find immediately physically attractive. Maybe when you're out on the pull, but that's not the only way people meet their partners.

And I'm sorry you don't like my opinion, Bupcakes, but I don't think your personal experience speaks for everyone. I think pulling people apart on their looks is cruel, sorry that offends you. I hope you are never on the receiving end in RL. I'll leave you to it.

[Morloth]

I find Jim Belushi kind of attractive actually. Not good looking perhaps, but attractive nonetheless.

[DoMeDon]

at bup

[DoMeDon]

Although some people do become more/less attractive over time due to personality too. i could grow to fancy a man who was hilariosly funny/interesting but not Sir George.

[BupcakesandCunting]

"Well that's ok then, I'm all in favour of equal opportunities twattery."

Good to know, Anne.

Why don't you go and sit on your higher plain where everyone is simply lovely and no-one bitches? Leave us monsters to slosh about and writhe in our own displeasure. You'll feel better for it.

[BupcakesandCunting]

I go for looks first. If they have shit personality/no LULZ, I'm off like a kipper left out in the sun.

If you say that you aren't attracted by looks first, you're lying. How do you fish out the ones you want to get to know if you have nothing to go on but looks? You don't. You go on looks. You are allowed to admit that looks count for sweet FA when it turns out they have the personality of a ham sandwich, but you are drawn in initially by what you find attractive. Even if it's subconciously.

Soz, but it's true.

[mayorquimby]

well in fairness in the shows and programmes dicussed in the OP the fact that the men are punching above their weight and don't attract women is quite often heavily referenced.
Seth ROgen in knocked up is very much a drunken mistake and the rest of the movie has plenty of "how the fuck did he get her" type jokes. In king of queens his wife is definitely the one with the power in the relationship and constantly makes jokes about his weight and how she isn't worried about someone stealing him from her. There was even an episode where he completely over-reacts to some perceived female attention becuase it never happens to him and nobody ever fancies him.

[DoMeDon]

Fwoar - look at the personality on her - is an old joke bandied about by men. Seriously though noone goes for personality alone. If someone was unattractive physically to you how would you fuck them?

They don't have to be fnciable to anyone else, but let's face it the traditionally less attractive men do not have women chucking themselves at them, like in the progs/films OP is talking about.

[SardineQueen]

Having said that I find that the looks I go for can vary according to how many beverages I've had....

[SardineQueen]

Quite, MQ.

Although sometimes people can not be great looking but be very charismatic - men and women - that is more than just "looks" but still something very quick.

[MsAnnThroppy]

Well that's ok then, I'm all in favour of equal opportunities twattery.

[mayorquimby]

Which is fair enough sardinequeen. different strokes and all that. Was just adressing missanthropys post about how everyone would be up in arms if men were slating women, so was just pointing out that I (a man) had slated 75% of the satc cast.
Can't see anything attractive about her myself, but it's all subjective.

[mayorquimby]

I thought everyone went for looks? Sure you want a personality after but I'm not going to get with someone that I don't think is good-looking so that I can convince myself that I'm not shallow.
Looks is what reels you in, personality is what makes you stick around.

[SardineQueen]

I think SJP is rather striking, personally. Not pretty,no, but definitely attractive.

[SardineQueen]

I go for looks, personally.

Obviously I need to get on with them as well but that's not the primary thing.

I think this "women aren't interested in looks" is a rumour put about by ugly men.

[mayorquimby]

Except that SJP has been slated on this thread with no adverse reaction.
I can slate more if anyone wants me to even it up.