for 'pulling a sickie'?

[unreasonablemalingerer]

i've just taken my first ever sickie (ie. not actually sick).

work has been hell now since last october. my boss went off with stress in november. she's not back soon. in the absence of any line mangement the senior managers are really taking the piss. the next person up from my absent boss is a senior director who is very confrontational in all conversations and not in any way supportive.

today i just couldn't make myself go to work there's nothing particular on today... no big meetings... i just couldn't go.

i know i'm totally unreasonable to phone in sick when i'm not... i know i should be glad to have a job (though have been dreaming of being made redundant which is even more unreasonble ) i'll go back tomorrow... but come and give me a kick for being so unreasonable.

[magicmummy1]

A few months ago, I'd have said YABU. But I have been dealing with my own totally situation at work for the last year, and it's been getting progressively worse. I have been quite shocked at my own reaction to the stress, and the effects are very physical at times - and totally debilitating. I haven't pulled any sickies yet - but I've thought of it often.

Sorry that you're feeling so crap, and that you've had such a rough day. Just remember that there's more to life than your job, and go easy on yourself.

[toomuchtobear]

hello,

it's me, i am not an unreasonable malingerer so i've changed my name (but still incognito).
today not good. burst into tears at lunchtime when nice colleagues asked how i was
then shouted at senior manager late afternoon when she insisted i submit a piece of work i'd barely even begun for comment and refused to let me finish it or even tidy it up - basically she made me hand over my own personal rough notes for the head of the organisation to 'comment on'. WTF???

I am losing it. Totally. Shit!!!!!!

[fairtradefloozy]

I don't think you were being unreasonable because you know your own "limits" - no-one else does.

[CarrotsAreNotTheOnlyVegetables]

My dad had a colleague who dropped dead of a heart attack at work while sitting next to him at his desk. Seems it was mostly down to stress.

Don't end up like him. Do whatever you need to get yourself out of this horrible situation.

[KaraStarbuckThrace]

I could have written your post back in 2007/8.

I ended up having a nervous breakdown. Take the sickie. And look for another job, clearly they do not value you. I ended up quitting and found other work because I just couldn't cope with the stress and the senior management were doing fuck all about it (my boss left and was never replaced, and the person who was covering my boss's role with me suffered a heart attack and was on long term sick - he left as well!)

[TrillianAstra]

If it's a horrible environment then hiding away isn't going to help - it'll still be horrible tomorrow.

Can you take this time to figure out what you can do to make it better? Or if there is nothing that can be done, to start your hunt for a different job?

[hatesponge]

YANBU.

Sometimes work just gets on top of you and a little break can make it easier to cope.

I am also off work today - I am not feeling 100% (have a sort of cold thing which is making me slightly dizzy, am fine sitting down but not sure I could have managed to stand for the 30 min train journey), I have been to work and felt worse in the past if I have had a big project on, but that isn't the case at present so I havent gone in. Like you, no-one will do my work when I'm not there, just leave it all over my desk!

[Numberfour]

I agree with Chessy.

You are obviously feeling so crap about work that going in was too awful to contemplate.

I reckon you may need more than just a day.... go and see your GP and get booked off for a while.

Hope you're okay soon.

[theevildead2]

I was going to say mental health day too!

[justcarrots29]

YANBU- it also sounds to me like you needed a day off. Sometimes it can be too much to bear when you know you are going into work to have others breathing down your neck and loads of work on. You know yourself that you will have to catch up on your work tomorrow so it doesn't sound like you are being selfish. You sound exhausted and a bit depressed in work - is it feasible that in order to give yourself a little bit of hope that you have a little snoop round to see if there are an other jobs about??

[Ormirian]

What chessy said. If you are facing this sort of situation from time to time that is one thing, if you are facing it day after day after day it's quite another.

[moomaa]

YANBU I have done this on very rare occasions and have felt a million times better the next day. I have seen it as a day off for my mental health.

[StayingDavidTennantsGirl]

This sounds like what is called a 'mental health day' to me - and maybe by taking this day off you will avoid having to have longer off with stress or having succumbed to an infection because you are so stressed and tired.

So no, YANBU. Have a good rest, clear your head a bit, and go back to work tomorrow refreshed and better able to cope.

[AMumInScotland]

If you were feeling fine and threw a sickie just because you fancied the day off, I'd be unimpressed. But tbh it sounds ike you are feeling pretty bad if you really can't face going in. My work's sick leave form has categories including anxiety, depression and stress - one or more of those would be a fair description of someone who just can't make themself go in.

But, as others have said, you don't want to start making a habit of it - better to find some way to improve the situation, even if it's just having a count-down to the day you get to leave!

[GabbyLoggon]

Yes, guilt can be a wasted emotion. You seem ok to me. "Gabby"

[AuntieMaggie]

If you had said it was just because you couldn't be bothered then yes you would BU however like some others, I think you are showing signs of stress and need to be a little kinder to yourself.

So stop worrying and enjoy today - and try to think more positively about yourself! :)

[AgentZigzag]

Everyone's a bit selfish and dishonest at some time in their life, and if you think you're not you're deluded.

It's not the end of the world, and the country wont grind to a halt, it takes two inches of snow for that to happen.

[bupcakesandcunting]

Yeah, malingerer. You selfish fecker. Your sickie will lead to another recession.

[pointissima]

YABU. It is dishonest

[unreasonablemalingerer]

don't worry scarletbegonia absolutely nobody will do any part of my job today. i can 100% guarantee that.

i will just have to catch up tomorrow.

[scarletbegonia]

I think YABU - you have a responsibility to your job. I'd be pretty annoyed if I was your co-worker and had to do your work today just because you fancied a day in bed.

You sound a little selfish to me.

[bupcakesandcunting]

BROKEN BRITAIN

[unreasonablemalingerer]

you've all been very kind, i feel very guilty but as you say, it's done now and i have to maintain the pretense.

i am looking for another job, and this one does only run till the end of july anyway (information that makes me even more unreasonable i suspect).

i am struggling a lot with pitching job applications because this role has really destroyed my belief in myself. and also in my sector, everybody knows about my project and knows it doesn't finish till the summer so i'd have to massage the truth about 'my contribution being largely complete' because i don't want to come over all negative and unable to cope.

going to use today to cook myself some healthy food for the freezer and this weeks lunches.

[AgentZigzag]

There's nothing like that feeling of 'having a day off school'

Don't waste your time feeling guilty, it's done now, spend your time on the net looking for another job.

Why waste your life dragging yourself into a job that's making you feel like shit every day?

Not good for your health, or for the people around you having to see you so unhappy.