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AIBU?

to wonder how much people spend on their kids at Christmas

90 replies

donkeyderby · 11/12/2010 17:29

I noticed on another thread that someone was intending to spend £200 - £250 on their kids at Christmas. I thought it was a shocking amount to spend. I can't begin to afford that sort of money.

Am I being mean and is this a normal amount to fork out?

OP posts:
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traceybath · 11/12/2010 19:12

In true mn addition they get a lump of coal and a clementine and then I emotionally blackmail them into giving them away to poorer children [well into the little women theme] Wink

Seriously I don't have a clue really. I buy what I think they'll enjoy - some practical stuff like dressing gowns and some fun stuff too.

Hey I like getting a nice thoughtful present so don't see why they shouldn't either.

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traceybath · 11/12/2010 19:12

Addition - I meant tradition obviously

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HecTheHallsWithBoughsOfHolly · 11/12/2010 19:15

I think I have no intention of telling what I spent on mine this year Grin because these kind of confessions never go well.

I just think that it is none of anyone else's business whether someone chooses to spend a fiver or five thousand.

As long as someone isn't going door to door demanding contributions - why on earth should anyone care? Let alone be cross about it or anything? But I have come to learn that people do seem to care. Seem to get annoyed about how much other people choose to spend. crazy! Grin

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Xenia · 11/12/2010 19:30

Yes, it's weird. I suppose some people who manage their money well do get a bit cross when people spend what they don't have on possessions their children don't need and then spent a year trying to pay it off and have no money for basic foods or lots of debts. You can understand why someone more careful might object to someone else being a bit silly like that.

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spler · 11/12/2010 19:48

Well. Children generally need toys and clothes and electronic bits in these modern times.
Christmas and birthdays is when they get this stuff. All at once.
I do think Christmas is a little bit about excess and feasting and grand gestures.
We have a reasonable income and spend around 200 per child (Have 3). The younger ones are getting scooters which are about 100 each & then stockings are about 25 each & then a few other things they want or need.
My family got fed up of each family buying stuff for the other's DCs that they didn't want so now we all buy our own kids what we know will be appreciated & wrap it up from Eg. 'Auntie Faye'. No waste & no duplicates.
My 11 year old is getting a laptop for 500 but she really needs one as she's at Secondary & needs it for homework. It comes uunder Christmas spends but basically - she needs a laptop & this is when she gets what she needs.

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ApocalypseCheeseToastie · 11/12/2010 19:53

If I told i'd probably get lynched

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SkyBluePearl · 11/12/2010 20:10

about 25/30 plus 10 on the xmas stocking, also a panto visit and visit to santa. My parent/in-laws also give us money (25 each per child)so we group it together to buy bigger items. They also have lots of smaller gifts from uncles/friends etc. The most important thing is spending time with family and friends. I'm not fussed about the gift side of things really am happy the kids will enjoy their gifts.

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AllHailDaddyPig · 11/12/2010 20:21

My DD is 2 and I've spent £250 on her. It might sound a lot but it's not that many presents, just a few decent ones!

I personally couldn't imagine buying my child second hand christmas presents. But would never say to somebody 'That's a shocking thing to do'.

Each to their own!

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TaperJeanGirl · 11/12/2010 20:23

My kids are 5, 3, and 1, we have spent just over £300 on each of the girls and just under £300 on the boy, my mum has spent over £400 between them, they will then have aunts/uncles/cousins/my nan getting them presents, thats our choice, they dont expect it (how can a 3yr old or 1 yr old expect anything, my 3 yr old has no idea when christmas even is!) I dont really care if someone who spends less thinks thats too much, or if someone who spends more thinks i'm mean, I got what I think my kids would enjoy waking up to, surely thats the idea?

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mamatomany · 11/12/2010 20:27

Well mine get a main present of £100 ish and then around another £100 on bits and pieces, I never ever expect to spend that much but it seems to creep up.
I wrapped all DD1's gifts about a week ago and it seemed a tiny amount but she didn't know what she wanted so I've sat back and now she's spotted something I had the money with Tesco's 3 for 2 offer to buy it.

However I think the big difference is we had a Christmas last year where they got next to nothing and even buying a meal was a struggle but they still had a great time so the presents are a bonus not the main event.

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Conflugenglugen · 11/12/2010 20:27

£15 - £20 for both DS and DSS. I've realised it's the adults' guilt in the household that feels the need to push that amount higher. Both are under 7.

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HecTheHallsWithBoughsOfHolly · 11/12/2010 20:27

Yes, it's weird. I suppose some people who manage their money well do get a bit cross when people spend what they don't have on possessions their children don't need and then spent a year trying to pay it off and have no money for basic foods or lots of debts. You can understand why someone more careful might object to someone else being a bit silly like that.

Actually Xenia - I don't. Object to someone else spending their money in a way that seems foolish to me and which leaves them in debt? What part of that affects me?

I would object to someone spending all their money on christmas and then holding me up at gunpoint and demanding I pay their mortgage. I would object to someone ordering thousands of pounds worth of stuff and sending me the bill...

Me object to how someone else chooses to spend their money and any debt they get into? Really?

I think not.

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Conflugenglugen · 11/12/2010 20:28

The kids are under. Not the adults. Grin

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Conflugenglugen · 11/12/2010 20:28

Under 7. FFS! Blush

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deaddei · 11/12/2010 20:34

I am spending £250 on each child ((2 dcs)
They get one other present from my brother-;that,s all.
I only buy for dh as well.
We can afford it-don,t have debt.
I don,t buy excessive crap Xmas food .

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KangarooCaught · 11/12/2010 20:37

A senible amount in relation to income.

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FunkySnowSkeleton · 11/12/2010 20:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

matildarosepink · 11/12/2010 20:51

I'm not really that interested in how much money people spend, but am interested to hear the variance of opinions on whether they give their DCs everything they want - or not!

I never have a set budget, but usually know when enough's enough. Not everything's brand new, and it's usually a mixture of requested things and things they need (though always try to make these nice!) I do enjoy shopping round for things, getting the best price, etc so I can squeeze as much as possible from what we've got.

My DCs don't watch that much commercial telly (preens) and so don't really have much craving for the latest 'things'. (Yes, folks, am an example to you all! Smile) All joking aside, I find that really helps. Who knows whether that'll still be working later on? Anyway -

I did an interesting experiment once with the eldest at about the age of 4 or 5. Got so fed up with her asking for absolutely everything in the shop, I decided to say yes to it all. (Fingers crossed that the credit card would go through). She started off by asking politely for this and that, and eventually became more crazed by the second, throwing 'just anything' in the basket. Eventually had the most massive tantrum ever when she couldn't fit anymore in the basket, tried to find another one, went red in the face, etc. Had to be carried out. (Note here: prior to that day, hadn't always said no - I've always thought about reasonable things, and about 30-40% of the time said yes.)Roald Dahl wasn't too far off the mark with the character Veruca Salt.

To this day (nearly 9), we both remember it well. She absolutely freaked when there weren't any boundaries. So from that it became clear that it isn't healthy FOR HER to have everything she wants immediately. And when she's had to save her pocket money for some hugely important thing, which she does now and again, she finds out how much work there can be in acquiring things. Just how much 'stuff' is enough?

I think only you can know if it'll make your child some kind of ungrateful, selfish brat if they get everything on their list every time. I don't think it's up to others to judge..

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Mishy1234 · 11/12/2010 20:53

About £200 between the 2 DC. The main present is a toy box which is for both of them. Not very exciting I know, but they are 6 months and nearly 3, so probably the last time I'll get away with it and they do need somewhere to store all their stuff. The older one is getting another 2 presents amounting to about £50 and the baby is getting 1 present which was about £10.

Other than that I'm making a pirate costume for DS1 (to go with a pirate dinosaurs book he's getting in his stocking) and a bag to store his pyjamas and his choice of bedtime story in (he loves his little rituals atm!).

Any money they get goes into their savings accounts.

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BarbieLovesKen · 11/12/2010 20:54

I've done Christmas shop for dc today actually.

Spent ?190 on 5 year old dd and ?27 on 10 month old ds.

Very odd how nasty some people have got over how much some spend. Sad.

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myleftcrutch · 11/12/2010 20:54

I've spent about £100 on my two year old and about £70 on the baby.

Had no intention of spending that much on either but the toddler is into so much stuff these days that I kept seeing stuff I'd like to get her. Got more stuff for the baby mainly out of guilt at her sister getting more!

Next year will be tight as I'm being made redundant in the spring so making the most of being able to afford it while we can Smile

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BarbieLovesKen · 11/12/2010 20:56

Oh and meant to say, my very lucky dc will receive alot from family.

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nancydrewrockinaroundxmastree · 11/12/2010 21:38

matilda in an interesting variation on your experiment my DC (4 & 5) are sometimes taken to Toys R Us and told they can pick any one thing that they want.

The care and attention that goes into picking their toy amazes me. They both start by picking something up and saying "please can I have this" I reply yes and then the say "Oh I'm going to have a think".

They also self regulate - if one of them picks up something (physically) big the other will say "oh no that is too much" (they are at the age where they equate big with expensive) and they chose something else.

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mummytowillow · 11/12/2010 21:44

Well its up them really, however, I've spent £85 on my 3 year old, she has about 10 presents which I think is plenty?

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loopylo · 11/12/2010 21:48

DD will be 4 months old so spent 14 pounds-she has all she needs in life-milk, cuddles, clean bum...

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