to think the following should NOT happen in a job interview?

[ZivaDavid]

I'm not a newcomer or a lurker (), I am more or less a daily poster, just NCed for the purposes of this post.

I had a job interview yesterday and the main interviewer gave me the creeps a bit. When he collected me from the reception area to take me to where the interview was taking place, he put his hand on my back and guided me through the corridors. It made me a bit uncomfortable that he was touching me (it wasn't a long corridor, and I was quite capable of following or being directed, he kept his hand on me almost the whole way), but it wasn't that alone that made me a bit at the whole thing.

In the interview, comments were made about children and working mothers (can't remember the exact wording, but it was enough to make any mother or expectant mother flinch, as if they were discriminatory without saying it explicitely if that makes sense). I think I must have been visibly perturbed, as the woman on the interview panel quickly changed the subject.

The rest of the interview went as standard, but the guy with the hand just called me for a follow up chat (didn't know they did this, is that standard?) and was just....weird. He made more comments about how I looked yesterday (saying I looked nice and my perfume was nice etc) than how the interview went. Then he said something like "I really hope to be speaking to you soon", which emphasis on the 'really'. It felt 'off'. Maybe he was just trying to be friendly, but it seemed flirty. You know how you always think you don't know where the line is between things (in this case, friendly vs flirty) but you know when it's been crossed? That's what this felt like.

Am I being too sensitive? Would I be mad to take this job, even if it was offered to me? If you think I'm being a twat, feel free to tell me!

[wineandroses]

I went for a job interview where the male interviewer spent most of the time telling me how attractive I was> this was some years ago and i was young and foolish however I still felt very uncomfortable. I thought about this long and hard (it was my first real chance at a good job) and spoke to my parents about why I felt uneasy (and it wasnt really about me it was more about the vulnerable people in debt and how some manager thought an attractive 20 year old would be sympathatic enough - bollocks I would just be cheap and possibly shag-able). I didnt take the job and have always been pleased that I held out for the non-racist non-sexist bollocks (as in - I work in banking so oxymorons abound).

[Sherbert37]

Sounds like an old school manager who has not moved with the times. This sort of questioning is just not allowed these days.

Personally, I would not want to work somewhere I felt uncomfortable all the time and where women are put in their place, so to speak.

[tribpot]

My red light monitor is going like this: in manner of a fire engine.

I interviewed at 28 weeks' pregnant. I was basically a bus. And I tried repeatedly to let them know I would be turning up like this but the agency - quite correctly - refused to let them know. I got the job, btw. Did 4 weeks before I buggered off on maternity leave, still there to this day.

Questions and comments in interview: wrong. Follow-on stuff: disgraceful. Not standard. Not legal.

I would express concerns to HR in the first instance.

[Pixel]

I once went for an interview like this that all seemed a bit creepy (and I really wasn't clued-up about these things at the time) and was offered the job but it didn't feel right and I turned it down. I later found out that my friend had also been offered the job (we were both being made redundant from the same company) and had turned it down for the same reason! I was so glad I hadn't accepted the job and also to have confirmation that I wasn't being paranoid.

[badfairy]

Comments about children and working mothers in an interview are completely unacceptable, as is asking someone there age or whether they are married or not and for the HR personnel not to have prevented such questions being asked concerns me from the outset, it shows that this company do not take issues of equality seriously and I would be worried about how I would be treated further down the line if I did choose to work for them.

As to Mr Creep, well I think if you go with your gut you already know the answer to that one

[ZivaDavid]

Sorry for not coming back earlier!

I have thought about it (and am going to sleep on it as well) but I'm fairly certain I will not take this job. Obviously I don't know if they even want to offer it to me, but if I'm feeling like this already, I don't think I would be comfortable actually working there. Still thinking on the issue of reporting him and how to do it.

NumptyBum - nothing wrong with being a newcomer or a lurker (I've been both at some point or another), but just wanted to point out I was a namechanger. And as much as I would like to be an NCIS agent, I'm not one of those either!

[NumptyBum]

Whats wrong with being a newcomer or a lurker?

[TondelayoSchwarzkopf]

and

[TondelayoSchwarzkopf]

Not correct mamatomany. Sex discrimination is relevant from advertisement stage as beyond. And making comments about perfume / children would constitute that.

Yes. Don't make a fuss about sexism and inappropriate behaviour from managers - you might be out of a job. Better to be quiet and not make a fuss.

[mamatomany]

Reporting etc etc will get you nowhere, until you've worked for the company for 12 months these things have no teeth in my experience and there is no legal aid for such cases. You just won't get the job.
Far better to accept the job if you want it, grit your teeth for a year, document everything from this day forth and then hit him like a tons of bricks.

[onceamai]

If you haven't been offered the job yet, you probably haven't got it. Put it down to experience and move on. If you are asked questions about pg, family at next interview, say that you thought such questions weren't allowed under the Equalities Act (2010), weren't allowed under the Sex Discriminatin Act either. Don't raise this with HR - they might be very friendly with him and they might move to a company you do want to work for in the future.

[Kitty81]

www.safeworkers.co.uk/job-interview-questions-should-not-be-asked.html

This pretty much sums it up imo

[pamelat]

ps) at the age of 18 (and I looked a very young 18) I was told in an interview (for a bank)

"You are very lovely and we hope we can work something out with you* Errmmm, lovely?!

[pamelat]

I would also take the job and report any susequent problems to HR, preferably outside of probationary period

You may join and the in house gossip be that he is just a creep who is like it with everyone, I could live with that, or if you cant, report him.

Why should it be you, and not him, out of a job because of his behaviour?

[dollius]

Yes, but it's not normal to comment on your appearance and the smell of your perfume!
Also it is not on to discuss your marital status and parenthood.
Unfortunately, it is par for the course. In all three job interviews I have had since having children, I have been quizzed about what my husband does for a living and whether I will manage the childcare ok.
It's bloody annoying, but it hasn't hindered me as I have got the two jobs I actually wanted.

[GoldenHaze]

I don't know what to make about his behaviour, but I've had a couple of follow-up phone calls after interviews, so I think this is normal.

[CrazyPlateLady]

I would always trust my instincts and I would run a mile and report him in the mean time.

When I was 17 I had an interview for a weekend job in a shop (that I got). The manager interviewed me, spent the whole time looking me up and down and I got the job there and then. I had a suit on and he told me to wear that until I got my uniform as I looked nice. Other people who had own clothes on looked nothing like what I was wearing, I was soooo over dressed for the shop.

He was a sleeze. He was married with children, reportedly had an affair with another girl but he made it very clear he liked me. At the xmas party he walked straight over as soon as I walked in the room and was sleezing around me all night. He was gross.

It was common knowledge that he was like this but nothing was ever done, even though he was 1 of 3 managers and there was another boss too.

[Kitty81]

I'm not certain 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure no interviewer is legally allowed to mention your martial or parental status, either present or intended, in a job interview, and if he made ANY comments of this nature he would almost certainly be leaving himself vulnerable to a sex discrimination complaint from you. Commenting in any way on your appearance, gender or perfume fgs is also completely and utterly inappropriate. The large restaurant chain I used to work for went so far as to not have mr/mrs on application forms, and only required an initial and no forenames and no dob/age to protect against people claiming not to have been given interviews on grounds of any kind of discrimination. Any half professional company would have in place a strict set of questions/ procedures for job interviews which are based on your professional ability to fulfill the person spec and NOTHING ELSE.

IMO, he was totally out of order and you should complain, in writing, to the hr dept at the company and agency, and keep a copy, if that is, you're not planning to take the job. For example, if you are a mother, or at any point planning to become one, and were made to feel that for this reason you would not be welcome at the company for this reason by his comments, you are being discriminated against on grounds of gender (working mums specifically criticized) and also age (if you are of "childbearing age" you could argue he was trying to put you off the job and would not have made such comments to a 17 year old or a woman of, say, 55). He is not only being inappropriate, but these actions are in breach of the law, IMO.

Yanbu. 100%

[PinkieMinx]

If I wanted the job I would take it and deal with creepo as and when. I would say 'please don't touch me' LOUDLY in front of someone if he put his hand on me and make diary notes of comments. I would address concerns to a senior manager (probably after probation period) if he did not take the hint.

Having said that I personally wouldn't want to work somewher I felt uncomfortable so i wouldn't want job anyway.

[Unrulysun]

You are protected in law from sexual harrassment and so what you should do is take the job and deal with issues as and when they arise. Not everybody wishes to be a test case in law however, so you need to make that decision yourself. Saying yes to the job doesn't imply that it's ok to treat you in this way though and I'm surprised to see people saying that it does.

[DuelingFanjo]

What kinds of comments did he make about working mums and in what context. Are you one/going to be one?

you can ask to see what notes were taken in the interview by the way, so I have been told.

Personally I would maybe wait and then call the woman who interviewed you and mention that the guy called you but hadn't said when you should expect to hear from them and so could she clarify.

[Piffpaffpoff]

Run a mile! Trust your gut instinct every time - I took a job despite having grave concerns about the interviewer who was the line manager. It all went totally pear shaped and I so wished I had had the confidence to trust my instinct. There will be other jobs, but the day to day grind of working with someone you will come to loathe is just not worth the misery.

[classydiva]

I got to how your perfume smelt nice in your OP then thought this guy is a predator.

Report him to their Human Resources department or personnel. Please don't take a job there, sounds horrendous.

Far too familiar.

[AnnieLobeseder]

I think you should make a report before you hear if you're offered the job, if you don't think you want it anyway. Otherwise, if you don't get the job, they might think your complaint is just sour grapes.

It's a bit trickier if you do want the job, though.

Tough situation!

[TondelayoSchwarzkopf]

I don't think it's necessarily a choice between reporting him and the job. I think you should contact the HR people, say how much you liked interview, want to work for company etc etc but mention your concerns about the process. Eg. I didn't think it was usual for the interviewer to raise employees marital / children status, to physically touch them and to telephone them privately?