To think its ok to use the disabled toilet?

[darcymum]

I am able bodied but it does annoy me that disabled toilets are often locked while a long line snakes outside the other toilets. Why can't we use it? what do they think we are going to do?

I was at gay pride once with really long lines outside all the toilets, including disabled and when a disabled person arrived (even without visible disabilities) they just went straight to the front of the line, no problem. In fact quicker than having to find a staff member to open it for them.

I'm sure I'll be flamed for my ignorance but go ahead, I might learn something.

[SanctiMoanyArse]

agedknees personally that counts as disabled in mmy book for this usage

TBH I wish tehy were labelled special needs so the user didn;t have to adhere to some random definition of disabled

[StayingDavidTennantsGirl]

It's not only disabled people who need to 'go' urgently. I have irritable bowel syndrome, that is exacerbated by the antidepressants I take, so I can suddenly get the urge to go to the loo - windy pains, and knowing that I am about to have dreadful diarrhoea. Would I get tutted at for using the disabled loo in such an emergency?

[roundthebend4]

no to be honest I tend to go with anyone using a disbaled toilet as a genuine need.

Staying

have ds3 who is a wheelchair user but

See my post I have ds2 aged 13 with crohns who is nt etc so does not look disabled but when has to go really has to go and never many stalls in mens loos ,so do understand, so no tuts from me .

[5inthebed]

Peachy, Ikea don't have disabled toilets, they have additional needs toilets, which I think is a better way of wording it.

[darcymum]

I was waiting in line with ds (age 3 and able bodied) while he crapped his pants. Very frustrating, standing right in front of the locked disabled toilet and he's never done a solid log in his life.

This was a while ago now and the only time he did a poo right in front of a toilet we are not allowed to use (happened plenty of times though).

And no, I'm not comparing the needs of myself or my children to those of the disabled its just that if they are empty why not use them.

[darcymum]

This was a while ago now and the only time he did a poo right in front of a toilet we are not allowed to use (happened plenty of times though).

Sorry plenty of other times though

[SanctiMoanyArse]

I would agree 5inthe

I hate the idea that people with bad IBS feel tehy can't use them (I know something of it- DH ahd for a long time, and BIL just ahd a colostomy for ulcerative-colitis-gone-bad fitted, at age 30)

What I don't like is when we change for carnival, boys need loo (usually ds3 who can't be left unattended and is too big tot ake in ladies without a barrage of abuse (see every MN thread on ages where boys cannot enter female changing rooms for impossibility) and there is a big line of women in front of us who want teh bigger mirror (on the road we tend to change in supermarket toilets), or at Glastonbury Extravaganza a few eyars ago where ds1 was close tow etitng just as interval queue formed, DH took him to disabled and a security guard stood in his way and said 'I think you wanted to use the otehr queue didn't you'; DH explained ds1 has diagnosed ASD and urge incomtinenceand got the reply 'That's nice Sir, now other queue' (DH didn't)

They wouldn't even have security by the toilets if people played fair would they? (And no tehya re not there for drug detection- am trained as a Glasto security guard myself)

[SanctiMoanyArse]

darcy tehr eason why not is that many people who need them only get a minute or two's warning and therefore your son in there might be enough to cause them to wet.

BTW anyone with syndromes such as IBS can access the locked ones- you need to find somewhere selling radar keys, it costs but it costs for everyone to get one.

[GrimmaTheNome]

DH always used to use the disabled loo when he took DD out when she was of an age too old to take her in the gents but too young to be happy to go into the ladies alone.

I've occasionally taken her into one when she was at the need-to-go-NOW stage.

We've never come out to find anyone waiting, fortunately.

Obviously, everywhere should have in addition to 'disabled' loo some appropriate facilities for parent-and-child - daddies needing changing table or loo for daughters, loos big enough for buggies. But where there simply isn't room, using the disabled loo is often the only option available.

[mumbar]

oh sancti thats good to know and I'm glad people consider IBS as a disability. Im often outragedd annoyed when people say oh I've had a stressful day my ibs is playing up. Try having it really bad gp diagnosed. (whole other thread!!!)

I'll look up a radar key purchase. thanks x

[moonstorm]

But what about the disabled person having to wait while I change ds's nappy? Usually the only baby change facilities are in the disabled toilets in the places I go.

Genuine question as it takes much longer to change a nappy than for someone else to nip in quickly.

[darcymum]

Well as I said I don't want to compare a child crapping themselves to the needs of a disabled person but nobody did need it at the time.

I don't really want to get into small childrens toileting because that's not why I started the thread or what it's about.

I was talking about other people waiting in long lines bursting to go while a toilet is locked and empty. Although as I said in the op I absolutely agree that disabled people should have priority access to they really need exclusive access?

[SanctiMoanyArse]

Wrt to the nappy changing / disabled toilets then its really poor tat facillities are so mbadly plannwed but babay has equalm prioeity, surely? As it's not just a disabled loo

[2shoes]

yabu
but if you want you can have dd's radar key....and her disability

[CloudsAway]

I've also had problems with IBS and irritable bladder, but have heard so many comments about non-disabled people using those loos that I'm not sure I'd risk it. But the urgency can be a problem, as can the embarrassment - at least it's a little more private in the disabled loo.

Sometimes the non-disabled loos are up or down stairs, and it can be awkward for anyone with buggies, luggage etc. to get to them.

I don't think making all loos accessible is really a solution, though, as the extra room that it would take would cut down on the number of loos available in total, given that they can't just allocate more and more space in existing buildings to the loos. There are things they can do with the design of them that would help, though, even whilst maximising the number that they can fit in.

[IMoveTheStars]

A lot of these problems could be avoided if there were separate baby change facilities, and if those rooms had their own toilet.

[zeno]

To answer the OP, they keep disabled loos locked to prevent people from shagging/ doing drugs/getting changed etc in them and thereby rendering them unuseable or, more to the point, expensive to clean and maintain. As a handy side effect many disabled people are also unable to use them because, well, they're locked.

I know this because I have spent several years now trying to explain to businesses that they are not doing their disabled customers a service by having special facilities that are kept locked. Having a sign on the door saying "please find a member of staff" doesn't help if, like me, you have problems standing and walking.

As to the entirely separate question of whether to use a dissy loo if there's a big queue, if you can queue and can use a normal cubicle then do so. Simple really. Being disabled is hard, and having loos available easily makes it just that bit more possible to get out and about and have a life.

[darcymum]

Zeno, have you seen the above posts about getting a radar key?

[zeno]

Yes DarcyMum. I'm talking about ones locked with normal keys. Very few use radar keys in my experience - it's one of those things that's a good idea in theory but not much used in practice.

[undercovamutha]

My mum is disabled, and whilst she also cannot stand for more than a few minutes (she uses wheelchair or crutches), she mainly needs the disabled facilities as she has a 'toileting' problem that means she needs easy access to a sink, as well as plenty of space. I just don't know how she would manage if she had to use normal toilet cubicles.

I think it is terrible that often the only baby change is in the disabled toilet. However, I must admit to having used a disabled toilet when DD was only just nappy-free and DS was a newborn. Just panicked and couldn't think through the logistics of big pushchair, crying newborn, desperate toddler! Feel bad, but it seemed like the only option at the time .

[mumeeee]

I support a young girl with severe learning disabilities, She doesn't have any visible disabilities but she needs very careful handling as she's liale to have a melt down at anything that is off routine, If she need to go to the toilet she needs to go and gets very uptight if she's unable to find a toilet. So YABVU

[mumbar]

forget disabled loos, accessable loos they need medical needs loos with our own keys.

the difinition of disability is anyone with physical, metal, allergy, medical etc needs which can affect they're ability to carry out every day taks.

I can use disabled loo cos of bowel probs but the definition would actually imply ds can use it because he has allergies and myself for my dyslexia.

[StayingDavidTennantsGirl]

I don't attempt to equate IBS with cerebral palsy or similar disabilities, troublewithtalk - but I do fear that one day I will be standing in the queue for the Ladies, with liquid poo running down my legs because I haven't got to the loo in time.

For me, IBS means sudden onset of bloating, windy pain, and that feeling of sickness in my lower belly that means I am just about to suffer a major bout of diarrhoea. It isn't predictable, and once it hits, I can have very little time to get to the loo before it happens.

So far I have always made it - but one day, the loo is going to be that bit further away, and the queue that bit longer - and I am afraid if I am that desperate, I will go and use the disabled loo. Would you really rather I suffered torrential diarrhoea pretty much in public? Or shall I just stay home so I am always near to a loo?

[2shoes]

By troublewithtalk Thu 15-Jul-10 21:30:21
Well said 2shoes, I don't think you can really equate IBS with cerebal palsy and similar disabilities

when I posted I was talking about the people who can't be arsed to wait, not people who have health issues that make waiting painful and embarrassment, of course they should be able to use the nearest empty toilet