Did your adopted DC get priority admission at an oversubscribed primary school - Any problems?

[RedPT]

Hi, looking at primary schools for adopted dd and the school that I think would be best for her is a small oversubscribed church school. Admissions criteria are 1 looked after or adopted children, 2 siblings, 3 attendance at specified local churches, 4 Distance (but all places are always taken before 4). We would get in on 1 but not the the other criteria. Has anybody been in this postion? Did other parents resent your dcs admission, perhaps thinking you had 'taken' a siblings or church attendees place?

[Glenshee]

You are absolutely overthinking it. People who already got into the school no longer care about admissions process.

You are not bending the rules or manipulating anything in any way, so how could it be your fault that you get a place?

In our school (also oversubscribed) a looked-after child was accepted even though the class was full, and an extra teacher assistant was appointed for the academic year for this very slightly larger-than-normal class. The teacher assistant wasn't a 1-on-1 help for the child in question (he didn't need it), but was brought in purely because of the size of the class. So all in all everyone benefited from the situation, and the child in care certainly didn't take anybody else's place!

[Arohaitis]

my LA publishes admissions details each year in the application booklet, I hope if you phone the LA office they will give you the figures you need for last year which may help you to work some of it out

failing that you could maybe ask the head to see what she says (although answers might need to be taken with a huge pinch of salt)

[Arohaitis]

Glen was it on appeal?

you could say he/she did since when the first person leaves presumably the first on list wont get in whereas they would have done previously.

Where I am some schools don't have enough sibling places so yes if you suddenly pop up and take a place the parents of that child will care, and they will tell their friends, and the people in year Reception who have an eldest starting will get worried that the same thing will happen to them but if you are in a land of school places a plenty then they will maybe care less.

Hence all my comments abut how oversubscribed it is and who misses out, although again where I am it is RC schools that are usually the most fought over

[TeenAndTween]

The other way to approach this, is to be happy to be open that your DD is adopted. If people are aware of this, it will stop any mutterings as it will be clear which criteria you qualify under.

I am not aware of either of my DD's having had any negative reaction to people knowing they are adopted. They have had questions, and we have given them the tools to answer, but not negativity. It will also help you to be open and friendly with other parents if you do not feel you are holding something back / lying to them.

We don't shout it from the rooftops, but mention if revelant. However we also don't give details of reasons why; if asked I give general reasons why children need to be adopted.

[Devora]

I think there are so many variables here, so many people's minds and motivations you cannot know or control, that it's almost not worth thinking about.

People might be curious about it. They might not. They might resent you for it. They might not. If they're worth anything at all, they will have no problem with it whatsoever. I can't believe that the parents in my child's class (in an oversubscribed school) would gossip about this. But that doesn't mean it can't happen.

But I think that anticipating people behaving badly is probably NOT the way to go in this case. You will drive yourself crazy. Personally, I am open about everything - about being an adopter, about being a lesbian, about being in an interracial family - and have had amazingly few problems.

[Wolfiefan]

My DC goes to a similar school. Hoping DD will get in next year. If your DD got a place instead of mine I wouldn't think twice. It is the procedure. The rules are there for a reason. Do the best thing for your child and good luck.

[Idespair]

Take the place, it is your dd's right. If you have any nonsense from other parents I'd inform the head teacher and let the school handle it.