Mother's day blues

[Wackymama1]

Happy 💐 Mother's day. Feeling the blues today - Grown up sons moved away - haven't even had a sniff of a Happy mother's day text. Have prompted and hinted the last couple years but this year I'm torn between accepting they've forgotten or sending them a reminder of what day it is. Long for those memories when they'd make paper flowers and cards. Should I send them polite reminder? Thoughts please. Thanks

Yes. My partner hasn't messaged, rang or communicated with his mum at all today, neither has his brother, I'm slightly disappointed in both of them and hope that MIL gives them a disappointed attitude for the next week or so, however unfortunately I know this wouldn't be noticed by either of them. I hope your son's are better

its a nothing day, just invented by greeting card manufacturers to create pressure, guilt, expectations and waste - ignore it

@Nimbostratus100 that's unhelpful. It does mean something to some of us.

so enjoy it or ignore it, it is not worth all this tears and angst on MN every year.

If you are treated badly all year, then whatever happens today doesn't improve that. If you are treated well all year, then today is an optional extra.

It isn't going to mend anything bad or ruin anything good

Unhelpful. Also, it isn’t actually made up by greetings card companies. Mothering Sunday has long been an event in the Christian calendar & is important to some people.

I wouldn't bother hinting to them.

Do you have a partner who can let them know you're disappointed and give them the opportunity to fix it?

No wonder you are upset OP, I am a mum of sons too, I would be upset

Mothering Sunday in the Christian calendar refers to servants visiting their Mother Church, nothing to do with their birth mothers, this whole thing about making it about birth mothers is ENTIRELY a commercial invention.

Just see it for what it is- an invention by men in committee rooms to make money by inventing a reason to pressurise people into hopes and expectations and disappointment and waste.

It means nothing

Can't you send a text message with a lighthearted reminder?

The thing is, they probably don’t think today means much but if it means something to you it should mean something to them. For example my mum values greeting cards and soppy Facebook posts. I dislike both, but I do it anyway for her. They should know that their laziness (I assume it’s probably laziness) has the consequences of upsetting you

Telling someone it ‘means nothing’ doesn’t really help or change anything btw

@Nimbostratus100 it means nothing to you. It's important to the OP. Leave her alone if you have nothing helpful to contribute.

By the Victorian period it was for servants to visit their mothers, nothing to do with church or greetings cards. For example it's detailed in Lark Rise to Candleford.
Nothing like MN for people presenting garbage as "facts".

If it upsets you, you should say something .

Just ignore it, it means nothing, or enjoy it and stop moaning, it is really a nothing day, and all this angst over it every year is just a waste of energy

It doesn't mean nothing to the people to whom it matters.
It isn't up to others to tell people who find a day meaningful that it is meaningless.
These are subjective judgments not facts.

Way too late for a "polite remunder". I would be inclined to send a sarky "Thanks for the mother's day flowers, they're lovely". They're adults, no one can fail to realise Mothers Day was approaching. They are lazy and thoughtless (on this occasion at least).

Ah, happy mother's Day 💐!

Yes I think you should send them a text saying something like; I GAVE BIRTH TO YOU! WORSHIP ME AS THE MATRIARCHAL GODDESS THAT I AM OR SUFFER MY WRATH!

2nd vote for this text

Don't send a passive aggressive reminder. A joke like above or a polite one like "Hey, your lovely mum is waiting for her Mother's Day call "

What's the point in sending them a reminder? It's not important to them or they would already have remembered. It's a very commercial day, means nothing really. Causes a lot of stress. If they are good well rounded children who are considerate in other ways, I'd let it go.

Thankyou for ( most) of the messages. 🥰 Some have made me chuckle. 🤣 I decided to send them a message, with a simple "what day is it" with a humorous ( for them) response of "Sunday." Their 20 something brotherly humour was to message me late knowing I would think they had forgotten - when they actually remembered all along just wanted me to panic 😂 and cuss them under my breath. Boys.

P....ed off here as well, OP. I know DD doesn't do cards, and she's a student so hasn't got the money for a small prezzie. However, I've been at work all day with people buying presents for their DM, one lady telling me how lucky she is and what her family have done for her. In all fairness DH has tonsillitis, but I came home half an hour ago after being out of house since 7am to find myself rummaging around in freezer as there's no one to treat me or cook for me. I'm being a bit mean, but I've said it's fish and chips out of freezer (as that's what I fancy) but DH is going to struggle to eat with his throat.

We won't be seeing DD at Easter due to cost of travel and final year so doing her disseration, but half tempted not to send money for some Easter chocolate.

and you believe that?

Are they now on their way with cards and presents then?

Me too, OP & Madmog
Not so much as a text. OK, I know it shouldn’t matter but it still hurts.