Following a diagnosis of under developed ovaries and womb at age 17, I was told I'd never conceive naturally. The consultant said "you're normal, don't worry about it" 
and told me to carry on with my life and consider egg donation (ED) when I was ready.
Fast forward 11 years, I received a known egg donation and gave birth to a healthy baby girl on the first round of IVF.
I honestly never thought I would be a mother.
My 'baby' is not a baby any more and is in year 3 of primary school 
I know ED is a sensitive topic for many and hadn't seen a AMA thread about it so happy to answer questions.
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I received egg donation, ask me anything
13 replies
EggDonationMiracle · 25/03/2019 20:03
OP posts:
Italiangreyhound ·
24/04/2019 23:48
EggDonationMiracle congratulations. How fabulous.
We have a birth dd, and then were told we could not get pregnant naturally. We have three rounds of IVF with donor eggs, two fresh and one frozen cycle. All failed. We adopted our little boy 5 years ago and all the failed treatment is a distant memory.
One of the few things I do remember is my amazing gratitude to the women who donated the eggs that became my treasured 'embies'.
Parenthood is an amazing journey. However, you get there, it's amazing.
EggDonationMiracle ·
30/03/2019 09:42
Did you consider adoption at all?
Of course we did. We considered every option available to us including not becoming parents at all and doing all the things you can do when you're not a parent. We looked into fostering too.
I can understand the feelings that people have eg. a desire to 'carry' a baby and actually, I didn't have those feelings when I was first diagnosed or during my 20's. I actually used to say I wouldn't have children or I would adopt.
However, as you get older you become more knowledgable of the subject of adoption and you also become more aware of your body and its capabilities (or in my case, its inability to do what it should bloody do!). I actually did get to the point, only when we'd committed to ED, that I wanted to "carry" a baby.
Adoption is (from what I have read and experiences of others in contact with those who have adopted or are adopted) bloody hard. There is no denying that adoption enables people to become parents, but it isn't the answer to all people becoming a parent.
I believe I would have been a very good parent to an adopted child however, I had doubts too, eg. my own selfishness of it being "too hard", knowledge of attachment, feelings of intrusion (the process and them interviewing your entire family), just to name but a few reasons, but the main reason for not adopting, was actually my DH, not me (he wanted his own biological child). However, I would have given it my all and would have been a 'mum' to that child if we had gone down that route. The difficulties that come with an adoptive child and DH's feelings, were the reasons for not adopting, not the 'carrying' of the child, IYSWIM.
Also do you think if it had been the other way around your partner would have accepted a child conceived by sperm donation?
Good question. He's not here so I can't answer for him at the minute but as above, I think I know the answer as we've discussed it. I believe he would have found it difficult; he would have felt he 'failed' as a man - the carrying of a baby is a woman's biology and the providing of a sperm is a mans. I dealt with my biological failure (I did feel a failure and still do) but for a man, that must be equally as difficult. When the carrying of the baby happens without the sperm of the man, the dynamics of the whole process changes. We have friends who had to consider this option and they chose not to for the same reasons as I've just given.
It is interesting and has many ethical facets to the situation.
Hope I've answered your questions
OP posts:
EggDonationMiracle ·
30/03/2019 09:27
Is your daughter anything like you?
She is exactly like me including the attitude!
It was one of my concerns that she may not be like me but it is surprising how much is 'nurture' rather than 'nature'. Her personality is very much DH and me. She tackles things like DH and is sensitive like me.
Any you haven't offended me at all. It was one of those "things" I worried about pre the decision to go with ED eg. what if she is nothing like me. I shouldn't have wasted energy worrying about it
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