I'm an HGV driver. AMA.

[DisgraceToTheYChromosome]

No, I don't eat Yorkies. Yes, my knuckles are hairy.

[Kezzie200]

Do you get fed up not being able to do 61mph and overtake the one in front of you.

Do you think it's more dangerous to have limiters than not.

[FootballsComingHome]

Why do you overtake other lorries on a hill thus blocking both lanes if a duel carriageway and causing congestion?

Do you drive with your knees whilst you eat your lunch?

[PatchworkElmer]

What’s the most dangerous driving you’ve ever seen?

[HirplesWithHaggis]

What's the story with hitch hikers these days? I travelled the length and breadth of the country, thumb out, as a teenager (um, forty years ago... ) and lorry drivers were brilliant for lifts, but I heard insurance these days rules that out. Does your company have a policy?

[PlantsOfPerspective]

Do you wee in plastic bottles and throw them out the window?

Is it true that you will not move over or adjust your speed to help someone who is bearing down a slip lane towards you?

[SausageTree]

Does it pay well, for the hours you do?

[Limpopobongo]

One of my pet annoyances is people joining a motorway . The highway code, which could be used to re-enforce the law, states that when joining a motorway adjust your speed to fit in with the traffic flow.

The onus then is clearly on the joining driver to fit in. Not a lot of people seem to appreciate this.

Do you think drivers think you are going to move over and why do they continually drive forward like lemmings to the point of near collision or being mashed by a HGV?

[ALongHardWinter]

Are you a man?

[Sanguin]

Are you driving now?

[ALongHardWinter]

I think the OP has disappeared!

[BarbaraofSevillle]

Do you drive the same lorry all the time or do you just get the next lorry available if you see what I mean?

Do you go overseas or just the mainland? I went on the overnight ferry from Liverpool to Dublin once and was very impressed with the lorry drivers manoeuvring up and down the ramps and into tight spots.

What sort of cargo do you move?

[PanPanPanPing]

For those of you who don't know who Disgrace is, he's been here for years. He's one of the good guys!

[DisgraceToTheYChromosome]

Sorry for absence. Male, don't wee in bottles, only move over for joining traffic if it's safe, I get the next vehicle available. Mainland work only, the job pays about £10-12 pH, no hitch hikers because the risks are too great. The load? Mostly light retail stock these days. In the past I moved cement both bulk and bagged, engines, grain, food, timber framed, paper reels (horrible stuff, you have sweep the trailer absolutely spotless or a single piece of grit ruins it), containers (bloody scary when the crane straddles you and you wonder if all the locks are off) and tobacco, the scariest of the lot.

The overtaking thing? Well, when your limiter is 0.5 mph quicker than the other guy, and you have NO margin on timing, you go for it.

[PlantsOfPerspective]

Disgrace, thanks!

Limp, of course it's the person who is joining the motorway who is ultimately responsible, but other people can help when it's safe to do so.

[maggienolia]

Would you like mini Disgrace to follow you into the profession?

[LornaMumsnet]

We're just moving this over to the very new and very sparkly AMA topic!

[MrsMoastyToasty]

Where's the best truck stop?
Do you often run out of driving hours? (My OH works in a warehouse for a major UK food retailer and late deliveries are the bane of his life )

[SnartyFartBlast]

What are truck stops like? I always wonder if they're different to the car service stations? Cheaper? Less naice?

[DisgraceToTheYChromosome]

maggienolia: Christ no! By the time he becomes old enough, most HGVs will be driverless anyway.

Truck stops are now pretty sparse. My favourites are the Stockyard J1 M18, Whitwood at Normanton, and the Hillside at Bury St. Edmunds. Filling meals for less than the car services. Certainly less naice because the smell of piss.

Don't often run out of hours, as my firm have reasonable planners. Spent a night in the snow during the blizzard, but I'd packed my gear and had a lovely time waking up in a warm cab and a fairly good breakfast from a filling station. Then I spent the morning waiting for for the plough.

[Spongblobsparepants]

This is going to sound really thick. The extra set of wheels on the truck that are held suspended above the road. Are they spares or do you put them down when the load is heavier than usual?

[BonnieF]

Hi ^Disgrace*,

Now that trucks have power steering, why do they need such enormous steering wheels? Why do they need to be bigger than a car or van’s wheel?

[DisgraceToTheYChromosome]

The extra set of wheels: there are several sorts. Mid axle on the tractor unit is for general work when the weight goes above a certain point. Trailing axle on tractor is more common in off road work like forestry. Forward trailer axle is for higher weights. Some container trailers have a central axle so the trailer can be split for double box work.

Big steering wheels are necessary because if the power steering fails, you'll need it! I've had steering pumps blow, and just getting straightened up is like a gym session.

[maggienolia]

Have you ever had a load stolen?

[FrankiesKnuckle]

Why do parked up lorries leave a rear door open?

[ilovepaperchase]

Do you get reduced pay if you arrive late? (Hope not!)

Are there any female HGV drivers? What's the percentage?

Would you drive anything else? Like a train, a tram?

Do you get a pension?

Is your car insurance cheaper because you're a frequent driver?

Best and worst parts of your job?