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What do you think of this? boy, girl and one bedroom

(37 Posts)
SparetheDetails Sun 31-Aug-08 19:03:21

DS1 has been seeing the same girl since he was 12, he's now 14 and they are as inseperable now as they were at the beginning. They're together all the time. She spends ALOT of time here, her parents don't seem to give a toss what she does.

Anyway we were recently talking about booking our next holiday, Florida in a villa and DS suddenly said "oh, please mum...can we take (we'll call her Katie)"?

I said "don't be daft, I can't afford to pay for another one for a start and her parents are hardly going to let her jet off to America with people they don't know!" so he said "no, I mean if they pay, they'll let her, I know they will, please can I ask?" hmm I honestly didn't think they'd agree so I said "ok, ask but don't hold your breath".

So he asked and they said yes shock he was so excited he actually started crying and she cried and I just didn't have the heart to say no. They're both very good kids, quiet, hard working, never in trouble...is it really such a bad idea?

Only trouble is, the villa is only 3 bedroomed. Meaning they'd have to share a room. He parents when I spoke to them actually said they don't mind this as they're sensible hmm in other words I think they were saying "as long as she doesn't come back pregnant we don't really care".

DH has suggested that we should let them share a room as they have earnt our trust so far but they're 14! they do act older but...please someone, someone inpartial talk some sense about this whole thing. I'm so confused about what to do for the best.

lunavix Sun 31-Aug-08 19:05:27

My instinct says no, too young...

however...If everyone else trusts them, maybe you should to? Have you had 'the' talk with ds? has anyone had it with 'katie'?

forevercleaning Sun 31-Aug-08 19:06:13

i wouldnt do it personally. Too much of a risk.

Can one of them not sleep on the sofa or somewhere else?

sleepycat Sun 31-Aug-08 19:06:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

brimfull Sun 31-Aug-08 19:06:56

blimey
rather you than me

I think 14 too young to be given carte blanche to do what they like in the bedroom,although they've probably either done it already or wouldn't dream of it type.

You know them best,is there n way she can sleep somewhere else?

Madlentileater Sun 31-Aug-08 19:07:18

3 rooms?
you and dh in one, who ds and katie in 2nd, who is in 3rd?

orangehead Sun 31-Aug-08 19:07:55

Id so no

orangehead Sun 31-Aug-08 19:08:13

Shpuld be say no

choufleur Sun 31-Aug-08 19:08:20

any i being dumb? if if's got three bedrooms why can't they have separate rooms? but NO i wouldn't let them share - way too young!

SparetheDetails Sun 31-Aug-08 19:09:38

I do trust them. I have two kids, both boys and DS1 has never given me any trouble at all. I'm not biased because he's mine (my younger one certainly makes up for it!) but you really couldn't ask for a better kid.

However, I trust them to be sensible. I don't trust them not to do anything. I think that would be stupid, they're 14. DH said he'd be suprised if nothing has happened between them already.

I have had the talk with DS, he was again very sensible about it. I try and treat "katie" like my own and treat her like an adult so in a way I've even touched on the subject with her too and she was also very sensible about it. No giggling or red faces...I just can't bring myself to "allow" them free reign at 14. Am I being a prude?

choufleur Sun 31-Aug-08 19:10:35

put the two boys together and let 'katie' have the other room.

posieflump Sun 31-Aug-08 19:10:48

2 boys in one bedroom and Katie in the other

choufleur Sun 31-Aug-08 19:10:53

and no you're not being a prude. they are 14!

Madlentileater Sun 31-Aug-08 19:10:59

why not put 2 ds together then?

SparetheDetails Sun 31-Aug-08 19:11:00

BIL in other room with DS2

brimfull Sun 31-Aug-08 19:11:15

obvious
give her her own room
let the boys share

Saturn74 Sun 31-Aug-08 19:11:32

Nope.
Not a chance.
I'm surprised by her parent's reaction.

brimfull Sun 31-Aug-08 19:11:43

ah
is there a couch

tissy Sun 31-Aug-08 19:12:07

yes to coming, no to sharing room

repeat, who is in the third room? another boy? the 2 boys share, another girl? the two girls share.

if there really isn't room, you either book a larger villa, or youngest child on mattress on floor in your room. Or, you say no to "Katie"

tissy Sun 31-Aug-08 19:12:47

x-posted

Hulababy Sun 31-Aug-08 19:13:29

2 boys in one room, the girl in the 3rd room.

sleepycat Sun 31-Aug-08 19:13:52

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tissy Sun 31-Aug-08 19:14:56

BIL, DS1 and DS2 all in same room, Katie has her own room. Would not make her share with any male (she's a teenager- she'll need privacy), or ds2 on lilo/ mattress on floor in your room. Florida villas are usually HUGE.

bamboostalks Sun 31-Aug-08 19:15:10

Definitely not, can't believe that you would even consider it, children need some boundaries. They are very young to be going out anyway and being in a "relatioship" from the age of 12 is far too much too young. I am amazed at her parents' attitude. It really does take all sorts.

RTKangaMummy Sun 31-Aug-08 19:17:13

each night take the matress off the single bed in 3rd room and put on florr in room with BIL and DS2

then put back again so the cleaning staff don't wonder why?

Or if self catering just leave it on floor

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