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De-frumping myself as I approach 40... I really need opinions/advice on SHOES!!

24 replies

SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 19:46

I was never frumpy, always veered more towards the glam in me younger days Grin but since DD came along 3 years ago, I have really lost my mojo on the style front.

It's got a bit better these last 6 months as I am making an effort to pop on minimal makeup and have eg swapped my godawful parka for a smart raincoat etc.

BUT... I still struggle because no matter what I try to do with my clothes, I keep ruining the look by not getting my shoes 'right'.

It's a spring-summer problem, really, hence why I am posting now. In winter I wear black biker boots which have the benefit of being practical (which I really need as I am SAHM) and look stylish (at least, imho)

Spring hits and boom, I have no idea what to do.

I would like to get through spring channelling a kind of Audrey Hepburn vibe in skinny black or navy ankle-grazers and fitted shirts (when I need to be smarter) or polo tops/interesting T-shirts when casual.

But what the blooming heck do I do for shoes? Trainers (which have the beenfit of being able to wear with little socks, because ALL OTHER SHOES rub my feet when I wear them without socks and have to walk long distances) will look godawful with my ankle-grazers and fitted tops.

Ballet pumps (which also have the problem of rubbing my feet) are crap for support and eventually give me back ache.

I can't do heels for day, obv, though I would do a nice quite high heel with ankle-grazers for an evening out etc.

So if I'm consigned to trainers (because I can wear them with trainer socks) all bloody spring/summer long, what on earth can I wear on the top half that isn't going to look frumpy and boring (jeans and a T-shirt. With a hoodie or cardi to keep off the chill. Every bloody day.)

Is there any shoe option I haven't considered?

Sigh. It's going to have to be ballet pumps, blister plasters and a back-ache, isn't it, if I want to feel more like my old self?!

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MadSprocker · 09/04/2016 19:53

What size shoes are you? Narrow or wide feet?

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SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 19:57

Narrow. And massive. (Size 8)

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mrsvilliers · 09/04/2016 19:59

OP am in similar situation. Am thinking boat shoes

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MadSprocker · 09/04/2016 20:02

I have these in silver and black and find them comfy, and I have really narrow feet. They come up really small. I have them in size four, and usually size six.

De-frumping myself as I approach 40... I really need opinions/advice on SHOES!!
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MadSprocker · 09/04/2016 20:04

It's bad enough having narrow size 6's!

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deathb4decaf · 09/04/2016 20:04

How do you feel about moccasins? I've got some from fat face (couple of years ago) that are like walking on clouds! I can see them fitting in with the Audrey Hepburn style ankle grazer and shirt combo's you mention. Maybe not supportive enough though. Mine are similar looking to these- www.fatface.com/shoes/bow-moccasins/invt/912330#ff_colour=Tan

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SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 20:06

Oh Mad wow I love those!! Worry that they would rub though... I seem to have the kind of weirdly knobbly feet and ankles that shoes love to dig into and make me bleed...

Might still try those though as I love them and they are precisely the sort of look I would go for.

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SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 20:08

Decaf... love those. Absolutely ideal. Think they'd def go with the Audrey ish look, is that right...? (Lost a lot of confidence in my styling abilities!!)

FYI am not saying I look anything like Audrey myself but I am slim-ish and tall so simple, structured styles work best on me.

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everythingsgoingsouth · 09/04/2016 20:11

shikshin.com/tag/block-heel-ballet-flats/

this style may be more comfortable than proper flat ballet pumps, I prefer them anyway :)

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SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 20:13

I love those ballet flats! Do they ship to the uk? Maybe being dozy but can only see them in dollars and on a US site...

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deathb4decaf · 09/04/2016 20:19

SomeDay I think they could definitely look Audrey ish! The fat face site has a few nice pairs, I'm liking the navy loafer type ones too. Have you been on Pinterest for styling ideas? I'd go there and type in moccasins, loafers, see what comes up!

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sleepwhenidie · 09/04/2016 20:31

Trainers could look very cool with cropped trousers and a smart shirt, it's a great look imo and definitely the opposite of frumpy. Have to be the right trainers though - something fairly plain, not built up and gym like. Will try and find some pics...,

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SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 20:35

Sleep... This is the sort of styling help I need!!

I have a new ish pair of plain cream Converse-type but not Converse... Just a plain plimsoll I guess. Jigsaw ones I think. They have no laces, just eyelets if that makes sense.

Would they work?

Worried i will end up looking a bit bottom-heavy (I have a hefty bum!) but I guess I just need to try it out and see...

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TheSpottedZebra · 09/04/2016 20:38

What about plimsolls, like superga or similar?
Or a loafer, or brogue for you Audrey vibe?

And also, have you considered the wonders of comfy insoles to make things easier to wear? Not ballet pumps though - they're crap for your feet.

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sleepwhenidie · 09/04/2016 20:40
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sleepwhenidie · 09/04/2016 20:40

I've pinned quite a few, see what you think Smile

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SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 20:41

SpottedZebra... Ah yes had forgotten good old SuperGa. My plimsolls I mentioned above are v like SuperGa ones actually...

I used to have a nice pair of tan loafers that I wore to death... Literally the only summer show I had ever had that didn't rub!!! They might have been Russell and Bromley ones actually so maybe it proves you gets what you pays for... Budget won't stretch to that these days unfortunately but a loafer would be ideal if it doesn't rub.

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SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 20:44

Oh god sleepwhenidle, they all look INCREDIBLE!!!

I would love to channel that look.

I worry that I am not skinny enough (size 12) and that I would somehow get the proportions wrong...

But I am inspired and am going to give it a bloody good try!!

Thank you so much.

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RunRabbitRunRabbit · 09/04/2016 20:45

Converse and other non bulky trainers can look great with the outfits you describe. I know. I wear them with such outfits a lot and am a knobbly footed size 8 too.

Jeans and t-shirts can look frumpy or super cool. Depends entirely on the jeans, T-shirt and how they fit you.

Accessories are important with simple outfits. The belt, bag and jewellery should be good too.

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sleepwhenidie · 09/04/2016 20:50

Welcome Smile! Keep the bottom half nice and skinny/slim fit and it's hard to go wrong tbh, you can go fitted (eg blazer) on top or loose fitting knits, especially over a shirt are in at the moment too, no need to be size 6 for those!

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MadSprocker · 09/04/2016 20:52

They really don't cut around the ankle. I have the narrowest, shallowest with a high instep problem feet ever, and they don't cut into mine! See if they are in a local shop.

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SomeDayMyPrinceMightCome · 09/04/2016 20:58

Thanks so much everyone. My first time on this board and what fab advice!! Thank you! Will post pics at a later date if I'm brave enough...Wink

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8FencingWire · 09/04/2016 20:59

I wear these in the summer. I also have a similar pair to this one

They are made for walking. For miles.

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SleepyRoo · 10/04/2016 10:43

Vans-style slip ons. V Celine

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