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anyone fancy going grey next year?

(431 Posts)
notactuallyme Thu 20-Dec-12 18:55:36

so, i've been toying with this idea for ages (am nearly forty) but always end up dying it. i thnk i'm going to go for it - anyone want a support thread for intermittent updates?

TheFarSide Sun 23-Dec-12 01:23:41

grin @ "managed transition".

Here's to a stripey New Year wine.

FellatioNelson Sun 23-Dec-12 05:16:45

That's what I need - a managed transition, from solid all over medium-dark brown, to what is now my natural colour - almost completely grey/white across the front, and half and half towards the back.

I don't want to spend the rest of my life a slave to really expensive blonde highlights though, no matter how fabulous they look. I'd happily be go as nature intended if I could guarantee beautiful, silky silver/white streaks, but I suspect I'd look more like a ravaged old brillo pad. sad

notactuallyme Sun 23-Dec-12 07:40:21

Haha, just read some of the decriptions of what we might look like - little bit harsh on ourselves aren't we!
I had a look round the supermarket yesterday - block colour, obviously dyed - reminded me not to do this, grey hair, not cut well - must avoid this, and some really sharp greying bobs and pixie cuts which sort of inspired me to keep going (on very much older ladies, but still).
I think red lipstick will be my friend, and pony tails or updos for a while!

yuleheart Sun 23-Dec-12 08:40:42

Now I'm really dithering - I don't want to lose my long curly hair but have sons wedding in approx 18 months.

3b1g Sun 23-Dec-12 08:44:29

In 18 months you could grow out 9 inches or so. Then wear your hair up for the wedding.

MissBoPeep Sun 23-Dec-12 08:48:16

You can get away with grey if you are young and have great bone structure and a good cut- usually short.

But if you are middle aged it looks awful IMO.

I am 50-ish and women my age I know who have gone grey ( along with giving up entirely on the fashion and make up fronts) look in their 60s or older. It can be terribly ageing unless you are attractive anyway and fashionable. Sorry if this offends but it's how I see it.

PeppermintonCandyCane Sun 23-Dec-12 09:04:50

It's totally worth persevering, but IME you need to work with a good hairdresser to achieve a painless transition.

Because I went grey so early, I got tied into having a cut and colour every six weeks to maintain my natural brunette. In discussion with my hairdresser, she started adding highlights and gradually lightening the brown base down to dark blonde, to avoid the 'badger stripe'. In summer 2011, my hair bleached badly in the sun/sea water and we seized the opportunity to drop the base colour altogether, and go properly blonde, by adding ash highlights to tone down the brassy yellow tones, and complement the emerging greys. So a year on, I still have regular appointments, and have a sharp-ish bob that's multi-toned ash and grey on top, and cut high at the back to reveal the darker natural brown/grey underneath.

I defy anyone to say I look like a granny from the back at least.

FellatioNelson Sun 23-Dec-12 10:34:38

I think you are right BoPeep. Although I don't think it's an age thing necessarily, it's a style and bone structure thing. I see some incredibly elegant older ladies with very classic, simple, sharp bobs or gamine crops in white/grey and they look fabulous. But I agree, most women of a certain age just look lumpen and featureless and dowdy, so grey hair just adds to an already quite depressing look. sad

TheFarSide Sun 23-Dec-12 11:16:20

I agree with Fellatio - I don't necessarily think that it's the grey hair that makes women look "awful" BoPeep. If someone really looks that bad, chances are it's because they've given up generally.

With age, skin fades and hair fades, and in theory our changing natural hair should suit our changing natural skin tones. I think we are just used to seeing dyed hair in older women and therefore associate grey with age.

Anyway, I need this thread to stay Positive About Grey grin

EuroShagmore Sun 23-Dec-12 11:19:37

I like the idea in theory but my hair with a smattering of grey just looks really scruffy. I'm greying v slowly - got my first one at 18, 18 years on I still just have a few. I'd like to go grey proudly but mine is more "unkempt bag lady" than "blue steel" unfortunately, so I always give in an dye it.

butterfliesinmytummy Sun 23-Dec-12 11:21:49

I am 4 months into pepperminton's plan. Found an award winning colorist with excellent credentials who has advised me to lighten my dark brunette base colour every 8-10 weeks to minimize the badger stripe, then add in highlights in the new year.

I am tempted to go straight to grey but am not yet 40 and although white on top, have salt and pepper underneath..... I have a pretty modern jaw length cut but fine hair so have been advised not to colour strip .... Also I spend 10 hours a week in swimming pools so don't really want to dry out my hair more than necessary.

Let 2013 be the year of the silver blonde grin

TheFarSide Sun 23-Dec-12 11:29:01

Lots of attractive grey women on here, but a few who look more like me "normal":-

knittedslippersx3 Sun 23-Dec-12 11:29:23

So, is it better to lighten your hair rather than leaving it to go grey on it's own? I have very dark brown eyes and eyebrows, I would look weird with lighter coloured hair.

ninah Sun 23-Dec-12 11:32:21

I have a few silver hairs along my parting, I pull them out when I see them, apart from that I am dark haired
I dunno what grey would look like on me, I quite like the colour of the ones I get but the texture is foul

DistantShip Sun 23-Dec-12 11:34:56

Hand holding needed please blush

Transition day 1 is tomorrow!! Yip Xmas Eve at noon the change begins.

My jaw line layered bob - which is currently mid-brown with a 1" skunk stripe of roots - will be transformed into a shorter pixie style, then the colourist will take over.

She took samples chunks of my hair yesterday to experiment with different processes to see what will work best on the remaining dyed ends.

There was lots of waffle about products and how I am
80% grey, that I pretty much ignored.

DH really supportive; although I think that may be because in his own misguided way, he thinks that I will spend less at the hairdresser in 2013. Ha ha!

DistantShip Sun 23-Dec-12 11:39:23

Thanks for the link TFSide - silver, hematite and anthracite are my new words to describe me.



notactuallyme Sun 23-Dec-12 11:40:46

I don't think grey hair is dowdy bopeep but maybe the majority of women who go grey started off not that 'fashion forward' iyswim? Ie gone grey having never really bothered with makeup etc. I am positive about it - I will be free of the whole stupid clinging on to youth and spending 4 hours in the bathroom with the henna. I hope!

yuleheart Sun 23-Dec-12 16:29:19

I would very much aspire to this:

or this:

or this

and now I'm off to make a 'grey hair' board on pinterest (why didn't I think of that before?)

soupmaker Sun 23-Dec-12 16:53:19

Yule, mine is like the middle one you posted, with even more white stripes at the front and side. I just wash and go in the mornings. But I invest in really decent hair cuts by a stylist I trust. It's not cheap but much better than dying it!

I am lucky as my hair colour suits my skin tone and although I don't wear make up very often, I like to think I'm relatively fashionable at 42.

I agree that to carry of grey you need a decent cut and to not be shopping in the 'classics' section of M&S.

FirstPersonPlural Mon 24-Dec-12 04:12:55

I came back to this thread because I luff you all my stupid BIL made me feel self conscious about my grey this evening...cue funny look at me and "Didn't you used to dye your hair, First? Why ever did you stop?"

Ok, so I'm 33 weeks pregnant with DC1 and a hormonal mess about to turn 39. I'm completely paranoid about what DistantShip mentioned...looking like my child's grandparent at the school gate! sad

I really wish grey hair was reflected more positively in the general media. We just don't see enough of it on people younger than 60, do we?

yuleheart Mon 24-Dec-12 08:50:30

soupmaker I'm envious. that looks lovely!

I've shown the pics to DH this morning and he definately doesn't want me to have my hair cut so I'm going to ring the lovely Cheryl at Saks (who has been the only one EVER to do good things with my hair) after christmas, and hopefully go down this route:

yuleheart Mon 24-Dec-12 08:50:53

oops, didn't tick the link box!

notactuallyme Mon 24-Dec-12 09:28:13

Distantship - good luck!
The grey hair in the media thing is just another part of 'youth' being prized. Hence women ending looking like puffer fish caught in a wind tunnel.
I love the links.
I am going to try to up my grooming, and stay grey!

DistantShip Mon 24-Dec-12 18:41:43

Thanks to Marie at the salon, I am now much less brown, with ash highlights to blend in my rootline and the old brown dye. The bob has gone and I now have a Michelle Williams style crop with longer 'sideburns' and a short choppy fringe.

I do like it, but it will take a few weeks to get used to different look.

Happiy to report that I dont look remotely like my granny wink however I do look even more like my mother

laughinglikeadrain Mon 24-Dec-12 18:43:40

I've just gone from a 18in lenght to a 4 inch lenght jsut so that i could cut all the coulour out!

Its still got some colour in but now it looks like its been dip dyed rather than my roots.

i was pleased to discover that i'mnaturally 50 shades of grey!

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