I'm a pre-K teacher (students are 18 months - 3 years) looking to get some advice from parents of children with special needs, specifically ASD. How did you react when your child was diagnosed? Did anyone broach the topic with you before you were ready to face it? Were you ever in denial about your child's disability, and if so, how did you overcome that? How do you wish the topic had been brought to your attention?
I'm not a parent myself, but I'd like to think that if I were, I would be grateful for an early diagnosis so that I could give my child the best possible chances for future success. I don't see disabilities as something to be ashamed of, and I think that helping your children live happy, healthy lives is far more important than your own pride or protecting yourself from whatever ignorant people might say to you... But then, I had a middle class, suburban upbringing, and that is definitely not the case with my students or their parents. I don't have a reputation to protect; they do.
Many of my students are first or only children, and all of them come from very privileged backgrounds - it's an expensive international school in Asia. If they don't have grandparents helping out at home, then they have nannies. It gets worse: we have "VIPs", students whose family members are CEOs, government officials, or good friends with the boss. I've had two VIPs in my class in the two years I've worked here, and in both cases they were (I believe) SN children.
The VIP boy currently in my class shows clear signs of having some sort of developmental disorder. I'm not an expert and can't diagnose him, but he's 2 1/2 years old and has trouble understanding basic instructions (come here, sit down, etc.) with or without accompanying gestures. The language ability he has shown so far consists of babbling and repetition with no real understanding. There is very little eye contact. He treats his classmates as if they're toys - pushing and pulling them out of curiosity, pulling fistfuls of hair, palming at their faces even around the eyes. He cannot sit still for more than a few seconds; he squirms in place whenever seated. And because he runs around so much, sometimes while carrying toys, I'm afraid he will trip and hurt himself or others. In fact, he has come to school on multiple occasions with cuts and scrapes from this very same problem at home. Most recently, he came in with a welt on his forehead the size of a tennis ball!
I have written to the parents twice, in the communication books we have for sending home school notices, about their son's inability to sit down. Their response? "Oh, yes, he's like that at home, too." "We've found that he can sit still for up to 15 minutes when he's with his grandmother." "We think he will get better very soon!"
My co-teacher has spoken and written to the parents about their child's lack of social skills. Their response? "He plays like that with the neighborhood children too." "He just doesn't have enough experience with other kids his age." "Give him time."
How can we get through to them that their child's behavior is not perfectly normal for his age? That he's not just a late bloomer?
Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on special needs.
SN children
Bringing up the possibility of SN to parents in denial?
kmt180 · 12/12/2015 13:55
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